playgroupsarenoplaceforchildren

My cousin Ann is getting married in a few weeks. I’ve been perusing her numerous gift registries and have found the same gifts on each one. When asked why she has so many repeats, she replied that she did this so that her guests would have ample places to shop and she didn’t want random gifts. Oh Ann, darling, there’s really nothing you can do to stop the horror of random gifts. It reminds me of a wedding just five years ago….

My coworkers hosted a shower for myself and a second grade teacher, Miss R,that was also to be married that summer. Seeing as I’m “just” the speech teacher, I wasn’t on the same friendship level as Miss R was with the other teachers. It was obvious that the gifts that were purchased for me were because they felt obligated. It was totally embarrassing to open my gifts next to Miss R’s gifts. Here’s a sample a the “gifts” I received.

1. XL negligee. I was heavier then, but by no stretch of the imagination have I ever been XL. Mystery was solved when I returned the XL negligee. I was given $1 in exchange.

2. Set of dishes. Fine enough gift, except that I’d registered for 2 OTHER sets of dishes. Four coworkers went in together to get this for me. Gee, when returned, I got $10 in exchange ($2.50/person), how thoughtful!

3. Dollywood teacup, complete with candle. Hmmm, at the time of the shower (April), Dollywood had been closed all winter and didn’t open until May.

Before I get booed and hissed at for seeming snobby, let me say that I do realize it’s the thought that counts. With that said, obviously they didn’t think very much of me. How embarrassing!

On a sidenote, my most favorite wedding gift I received was not on my registry. It was a set of three Sorrento bowls that I absolutely LOVE. So Ann, not all random gifts turn out badly! Of course, it’ll be hard to get gifts worse than mine!