I have a question to ask about your husbands. Before I do, though, let me just be clear…I’m not saying that men are dumb idiots, ewww, yuck, blech MEN! No. I’m simply asking a question.
Let me set up the scenario. Husband can’t find something and calls to you to help him find it. “Honey! I can’t find the ointment/peanut butter/towels/shoes/whatever.”
You call back, “Honey! It’s right there on the shelf/in the drawer/on the floor/where ever!”
Somehow the Husband cannot find the item. You are beckoned to come find it for him. You are irritated because you KNOW that the item is RIGHT THERE. You huff and puff and roll your eyes on your way to find this item for him.
And voila! There it is. It truly is RIGHT THERE. Husband would have found it if he had looked behind, over, beside….. Instead of putting any effort into the search, he asked for your help. Instead of being grateful, he’s irritated that it wasn’t in plain view, and that he’d have to actually LOOK.
This male pattern blindness, as I like to call it, also occurs in the kitchen. Let’s say that the Husband offers to clean up after dinner, but cleaning up only entails putting dirty dishes in the washer. It does not include wiping the counters, sweeping the floor, or hand-washing any items not suitable for the dishwasher. When the “over sight” is mentioned, the Husband claims not to have “seen” the smeary counters, crumby floor, or giant high chair tray in the sink.
Does this happen to all husbands or just the one I’m married to named Tate?
Wait, your husband puts the dishes in the dishwasher when he cleans up after dinner?!?!? What is THAT about?!?! I’m convinced that my husband only realizes that the sink is full when he runs out of spoons and ice cream bowls.
Alison’s last blog post..I COMPLETELY forgot!
OMG! My single largest pet peeve in the freaking world. I have given up even asking my husband to “clean” the kitchen. It only makes me furious and ready to throw the crock pot that he refused to wash at his large, and apparently blind, head.
It’s all men, I’m afraid.
Becky J.’s last blog post..Spring Cleaning Checklist
Oh yes – mine suffers from this condition as well… If you ever find a cure, let me know!
Deb – Mom of 3 Girls’s last blog post..Missing: One plastic Easter egg, light blue with candy inside…
ah deer one…this is inherent in the male species…the apple don’t fall far!!!
Mine too! I got so irritated the other night because I was on my way home form work and he called to ask me to pick up a can of something I KNEW was in the cupboard. I insisted it was there, he insisted it wasn’t. So I stopped, in the rain, and got it. It was there, just like you and I knew it was.
heather’s last blog post..flashbacks
No. DH does it too. I will LOOK around, but not move anything or look behind anything…to me it is the equivalent of only sweeping the center of the floor and not the edges…and get this…Babyhead does it too. I think it is the Y gene…
Sandy’s last blog post..Oh, one more pregnancy thing for today…
oops…
I meant HE will look…not I…
sorry, I have a cold and my brain isn’t working correctly.
Sandy’s last blog post..Oh, one more pregnancy thing for today…
It’s gotta be a male thing…it’s already happening with my 2 oldest boys with the male pattern blindness. There’s no hope for the 3rd boy either. Thank you so much for giving a name to the condition. The more you know….
Jean’s last blog post..Where Do I Sign Up For Mother Of The Year?
Men can’t find things because women move them and forget to tell men that they moved them.
~Jef
Edge’s last blog post..What’s on Jef’s Cell Phone and On Jef’s Mind 03-24-2008
Sorry, but I just had to include a link to my blog post from a few months ago. I discussed this same exact issue. No way, you are definitely NOT the only one.
http://ourpieceoftheworld.blogspot.com/2008/02/my-husband-my-biggest-kid.html
Irene’s last blog post..Learning Photography
Sorry if this repeats, but my comment didn’t show up!
Anyway, I blogged about this same exact issue a few months ago!
http://ourpieceoftheworld.blogspot.com/2008/02/my-husband-my-biggest-kid.html
Irene’s last blog post..Learning Photography
Oh my GOD. My girls have even picked up the name I gave this phenomenon. It’s called a “Marky Look”, after their father. It involves slightly glancing around, and then giving up, instead of moving things a bit, just as you said. It. is. infuriating.
And I don’t even bother asking him to clean up after dinner, because it just creates more work for me later by having to scrub crusted-on food off of dishes and pans. He doesn’t even rinse dishes or put them in the dishwasher, just stacks them in BOTH sides of the sink!
What IS it with men? And why do I continue to love him so much?
all things bd’s last blog post..It Worked! Almost.
My husband has an acute form of this condition. It makes it impossible for him to find mustard, keys, credit cards or any single article of clothing that he is hunting for.
I’ve searched for a treatment – if you happen to find one please let me know.
Cass’s last blog post..What I read and what I said
Sadly, this is a better description of me rather than my husband. :S
Loralee’s last blog post..Sideblog: Wanna hear me sing in front of an orchestra in a purdy (albeit ’snug-fitting’) dress?
Husband’s named Brad also have this problem and show all of the listed symptoms.
Sarah’s last blog post..“Rosanna, He’s Alive!”
I live with four of them. It’s a characteristic found only on the Y gene.
As I often say, “if it’s BEHIND the orange juice, it doesn’t exist.”
MammaLoves’s last blog post..How He Became Our Son, Part I
Btdt, got the tshirt for it! It really IS a man thing :/
Suburban Oblivion’s last blog post..What is Your “One Word”?
Your husband has different issues than mine. Mine doesn’t understand taking dishes to the kitchen, much less putting them IN the dishwasher.
My husband doesn’t understand how to hang up his own clothing.
My husband has male pattern slobbness, I think. Is there a cute?
Rhea’s last blog post..It’s Alive! Easter barf and a bride.
Oh yeah, it’s a male thing. Sometimes I can even find whatever C is looking for without him even telling me what he’s looking for. I’ll see him poking around and knowing that it’s faster for me to get up and find whatever than it will be for me to clean up the mess he’ll make looking for it, I just get up and give it to him.
We had a long stand off in the kitchen when I was pregnant and the smell of anything stronger than water made me hurl. He does the dishes, but yes… he doesn’t wipe anything down and for some reason he never puts the silverware away, ever. It’s the easiest part to empty, but he’ll just leave them in there and load dirty ones in and wash them all again.
Coming from a household where my father was the one who was in charge all the cooking and cleaning stuff, living with C was hard to get used to. When my dad visits he’s scrubs my kitchen, I don’t know how my mom got so lucky.
K’s last blog post..Making Orange
My husband does this daily. It makes me want to poke him in the eye!
Amanda’s last blog post..Lottery Tickets From My Gay Aunt Flo
Your husband gets off the sofa and looks for things? All by himself? He doesn’t just lay there and yell until the thing appears in his hand? Wow…how about that.
Shania’s last blog post..I feel so luurved!
Oh thank GOD, I thought I had the only blind hubby!
Jen’s last blog post..Conversations Overheard in our Car
Oh, The Man ALWAYS does that. He won’t even look he’ll just be like hey where’s this and I’m like did you even look for it? No.
RubiaLala’s last blog post..I Am Awesome
Hubby’s favorite thing to do is to drop his coat somewhere weird, like the floor or the living room couch. Then, when he needs it again, he can’t find it because he can’t possibly be expected to remember where he left it! So I suggested putting it on the coat hook, so that it would be there the next time he wanted it. And he looked at me like I was crazy. He’s actually good at finding stuff that’s in the same place every day, but since I’ve yet to train him to put his own things in the same place every day (unlike the children), I still have to help him find things almost daily.
And no, I’m not the least bit annoyed.
Jerseygirl89′s last blog post..The Ex-Files
Yep. They all have it. Drives me crazy. Even worse, mine leaves stuff all over the house and the floor and gets mad when I put it away because he can’t find anything. I told him if he wants to know where his stuff is then he can put it away himself.
Someone Being Me’s last blog post..Easter
Oh my fracking goodness. Have you met my man? Seriously? It drives me crazy when, once in a blue moon, he offers to ‘do the dishes’ after dinner. And he does. only. the. dishes. and puffs up his chest with pride. Seriously?? What about the food that still needs to be put away? What about the sauce still spread on the counters???!!!
OK, I’ve calmed down… So to answer your question, yes. It happens.
Smiling Mom’s last blog post..A Family Necklace
“Male Pattern Blindness”
THANK GOD this horrid affliction at last has a name! I’ve been searching the internet for information on the debilitating disease for 7 years with no result. My poor husband has a horrible case of the disease, it’s truly crippling his ability to be home alone for any length of time ~ tell me, do they provide seeing eye dogs for assitance for the patients?
I mean, it would have to be a girl dog obviously.
LMAO
Bellamomma’s last blog post..For all the talk of Britney’s “star spot” AKA I love Sara Chalke
Um. I’d go with ALL HUSBANDS. Some friends were over tonight and after dinner the men spent the rest of the evening pouring over MLB’s spring whatever training whatever. As soon as they left, I went upstairs to nurse the baby and put him to bed. I came back down (at 9:45) and my husband was feeding my daughter on the sofa. I went upstairs to take out my contacts. I came back downstairs (at 9:53) and my husband was sitting on the sofa with my daughter watching baseball. I try to get online to read some good quality writing at Playgroups are no place for Children, a bit of me time much deserved at 10pm, I feel, and my daughter wants to type. I get mad. My husband doesn’t understand. They go upstairs. About 10 minutes ago at 10:41pm my daughter comes downstairs looking for her blanket. She is still fully dressed. Daddy is feigning sleep upstairs. He doesn’t understand why I’m mad. The blanket is on the floor in the bathroom, about 2 steps from where my husband has refused to get out of bed to look for it.
Thanks for giving the disorder a name. Now maybe we can medicate it.
Sus’s last blog post..Before and After
My husband does suffer from this condition, but it now appears that my mother is also developing it too…as well as my oldest daughter. Does this mean that I do too much for them? Or that they are taking advantage of me being “Julie the Cruise Director”?
Scarlet O’Kara’s last blog post..Beautiful Day At The Park…
oh yes…
i think it’s rather common…
one time i overheard a coworker telling her husband (over the phone…yes…he actually called her at work to find out where IT was) “just touch EVERYTHING.”
i found it hilarious at the time, but have learned that IT WORKS….try it!
jen’s last blog post..yipee!
Oh yes, mine is in the club also. Just this weekend –
Hubbie — Have you seen my macro lens?
Me — It is in the kitchen on the counter.
Hubbie — I looked there and it’s not there.
Me — It is there, I can see it right now.
Hubbie goes in and finds it astonished.
I simply can not comprehend this — I don’t know what he sees when he looks, but I do know it is definitely not what I see!
Yertle’s last blog post..Monday Motivator
Every boyfriend, my brother AND my dad seem to have it. Some of them also have what we call “Selective Deafness”.
Argh – guys.
Can’t live with them
and it’s illegal to shoot them.
Mostly.
CourtneyRyan369′s last blog post..I <3 Peeps…
We have granite counter tops so spills really blend in. It’s a nightmare, I don’t think I have ever seen my hubby wipe down the counter. Ever. They are all the same. Glad to know I am not alone.
Denise’s last blog post..Super Dad!?!
I think that is ALL men. I hate when that happens. You know just how to pick ‘em Jennifer.
Anglophile Football Fanatic’s last blog post..The BiTcH is BaCk!
I don’t have too much trouble with it around the house, but the kitchen thing. Totally. And why do they not understand that not rinsing dishes that will be sitting in the dishwasher overnight means that they will have to be scrubbed – by hand (and you know who’s gonna do that) – after they go through the dishwasher because the food is dried on? Ugh!
Krista’s last blog post..Mama Got a KitchenAid!
Yah, I do love the menfolk, but sometimes I think they got borned with an extra layer of (situational/conditional) blindfold over their eyeballs. Earballs, sometimes, too. Depends.
Maggie’s last blog post..Milestone(s)
actually my husband doesn’t have that disease … but my daughter??????? omigod. you could die from it.
janet’s last blog post..Lawsie, Miss Scarlett, I don’t know NOTHIN’ ’bout birthin’ no babies!!
omg, these comments are killing me! But I have to confess, I am equally bad at finding things as my husband is, not because I don’t actually look, but because I’m such a slob, whatever I’m looking for is buried under piles of my stuff!
My husband also does his fair share of dishes, and we don’t have a dishwasher, so everything has to be washed by hand. But now that I think about it, he doesn’t wipe down the countertops, or de-gunk the inside of the microwave, or open those little trapdoors on the toaster and shake out the crumbs, or sweep the kitchen floor, or MOP the floor, etc.
Shit, my husband has male pattern kitchen blindness!
Elizabeth’s last blog post..Into the Wild-A truly tragic story, but an incredible film
These may be the funniest comments ever!
We were at my in-laws one day and my MIL asked my FIL to go in the pantry and get some hand made jelly they got as a gift. So he goes in there and looks around for like 4 minutes, and he keeps asking, where is it? Finally my husband goes in to help and the two of them are in there for about 10 minutes refusing help. Finally I go in there and find it in about 20 seconds – and I haven’t seen it before! Proof that men are indeed blind. And in this case it wasn’t for a lack of trying.
I can’t stand when my husband asks me where something is before he even looks.
And the cleaning of the kitchen – why don’t they wipe down the counters – that drives me crazy! I might as well do it myself, right? Ugh.
Cathy’s last blog post..Over Nine Months Ago
I posted a comment last night, but it’s not there anymore! Boo hoo!
Ok, so I blah blah(ed) about my husband being the same (blah blah some more).
I have to admit, though, that what pisses me off even MORE is the fact that though I am uber organized, I am the one who -in a moment of haste, because we NEED whatever it is that I’m looking for – CAN’T find said thing, because it’s not where it SHOULD be…..file cabinet, desk, hutch….nope. But, when hubby decides that he needs something, he can dig through a pile of crap randomly stuffed in the closet, and come out with said thing in mere seconds??? What’s up with THAT?!?!
Mandy’s last blog post..Easter – It’s a good thing
I’ve taught my husband to “look like a woman would.” It took 10 years, but it worked.
Karen Sugarpants’s last blog post..Shiny Happy People Holding Hands
Male Pattern Blindness…oh my GAWD.
He’s got it. He looks for things, then asks me where it is, and when I tell him, refuses to believe me, so asks “What’s your second answer?”
He also seems to think the phrase “Can you clean up from dinner?” means that one should only pack up the leftovers and stack the dishes in the sink. We don’t have a dishwasher. (In fact, when we did, do you think the dirty plates ended up in there??)
Di’s last blog post..More things I love…
I thought I responded to this, but must have been in my sleep. See, now I am dreaming about YOUR blog. What is wrong with me? Oh, to topic:
Male pattern blindness is widespread at my house only out-trumped by male pattern helplessness. My husband who I am now throwing under the bus fakes lack of skill and PURPOSELY does easy things wrong so I will tell him to stop and get out. I catch him at it all the time. UGH. I need a wife.
HRH’s last blog post..Building a better girltrap…
According to recent research, MPB is a symptom of both Toomuchjunkfooditis and Chronic Remote Thumb (CRT). Scientists are still searching for a cure.
MollyDoll’s last blog post..Fleeting thoughts of blogicide
My husband never “sees” the mess and always proclaims I just don’t see it. I don’t really believe it of course lol
OMG..My sis and I were discussing this last night. Her hubby suffers from this affliction. So does my son. And our father. And our other bro-in-law. Strangely, not her daughter or our mother or our other sister…and of course not us!
Indygirl’s last blog post..Reality Check
My husband does this too (the “I can’t find the thing that’s right here, right in front of me, or if I just moved this small piece of paper, I would see the thing I’m looking for” thing). But there are two other things about him:
1. He squirrels things away. Meaning, he puts things randomly away in closets and drawers and bookcases, never putting the same thing in the same place, so when one day I’m thinking, “hmm…where is that cook book I just bought?” and so I go where I left it (kitchen table), and can’t find it, I know to either ask him or call him at work and ask him. I don’t even bother trying to find it because it’s never put away in a logical place (the book case I keep all my cook books). He likes the semblance of neat and tidy, when, in fact, we are soooo not.
2. He cleans the kitchen: floor, counters, puts dishes away. And this drives me freaking nuts. Why? Because in the time it takes him to do this, something he feels the need to do, I could have fought world hungry and beaten it, written 10 novels and taught our kid calculus. In otherwords, he takes flipping forever to get it done!!! Same thing with cleaning the bathrooms, which now I won’t let him do since he takes all day to do it.
Janine’s last blog post..This is what I love about corporate america.
OMG I nearly spit my tea out reading the last paragraph! I could have written this entire post because I think we must be married to the same man! ha!
Seriously, what is it with them? Just this morning he was looking for his hair wax. It never leaves that bathroom. He simply glanced. Didn’t see it and called to me. I simpley yelled back “move the hand towel.” WOW……..there’s the hair wax!
And the kitchen thing……….he only does the dishes. Not the counters. Not the cooking utensils. It makes me crazy!
Sorry for the long comment…….have a great day
Mary’s last blog post..Happy Easter!
On the positive side, as the only female in the house, Xmas time is easy for me. I don’t have to hide everyone’s presents. I can leave them in the middle of the floor and boys just step over them cluelessly on their way to fart or play ball.
Anne Glamore’s last blog post..Treasure From The Internets