Yesterday when I wrote the post about my very bad day, I admit that I wanted you to comment and make me feel better. (You did, by the way. Thank you.)
I wanted validation.
In fact, many of the posts I write, I seek validation. The sense of community I feel when I read your comments is one of the reasons I try to write everyday.
When I first discovered blogs, I remember sitting at my computer with my mouth open in stunned expression, reading the truth about motherhood. I wasn’t alone! I wasn’t the only one who felt like this! Other people’s babies cried, too! You have no idea what you’re doing either! Validation!
My favorite posts to read are still those that leave me in awe. Those posts, so eloquently written, that describe a facet of my life that I still relish in realizing I’m not alone in feeling. I think that nobody, except another mother, can truly grasp and reconcile those difficult range of feelings we experience everyday…intense love, followed by flashes of white hot anger, followed by doubling over guilt, the floundering…
Sarah at Semi-Desperate Housewife wrote a post that so perfectly described all of these feelings.
Pendulum. This post truly made me feel validated for the ups and downs we all experience in our sometimes blind journey through motherhood. For that, I awarded her the Perfect Post Award.
Go read it. And wish her congratulations on her Perfect Post.
More perfect posts at Petroville and Suburban Turmoil.
Alison
April 1, 2008 at 6:48 am
I’m so glad we were able to make you feel better and validate you! I think sometimes, that’s all we’re looking for with a post and when we get it, we feel so much better!!
I enjoy knowing that there are so many other bloggers and moms out there who are sharing in my experiences and I can turn to them for advice and validation!
Plus, it’s nice to know that my husband isn’t always the only sometimes “winner” out there!
Alison’s last blog post..Night Terrors
rachel
April 1, 2008 at 6:52 am
Yes! Yes! Yes! Exactly.
Community, love all that good stuff. This is spot on, I still sit and read blogs in total holy cow awe and love it.
Hope today is a brilliant one for you darlin’.
rachel’s last blog post..The Manic Mom Dash: Or Naked in Target
Sadie
April 1, 2008 at 7:17 am
Community is a good solid reason for blogging! I think it’s what we all look for (well, besides the attention, of course
).
I hope today is much better for you than yesterday. We all have those horrible awful days…and we’re justified in them…but it always feels good to get out of them!!!
Sadie’s last blog post..I’ll count my blessings instead of sheep…
Sarah @ Ordinary Days
April 1, 2008 at 7:43 am
Amen! But for the longest time when I first started reading blogs, all I could find were the perfect moms who spent every waking moment bettering and enhancing the lives of their children. I felt so much better when I found the blogs that were more about honesty than bragging.
Sarah @ Ordinary Days’s last blog post..Why I Am Up At 4:45 AM
Sister Honey Bunch
April 1, 2008 at 8:31 am
I really appreciate the honesty I read here and on other blogs. It makes me feel less like a freak. If that’s possible!
Sister Honey Bunch’s last blog post..Sometimes you need a little “Come to Jesus”
Sandy
April 1, 2008 at 8:42 am
I totally understand Jen. I too write sometimes to look for validation. It seems that every where you turn people think you you should be the happy mom who enjoys it 110% of the time no matter what…and if you don’t you are frowned upon. It is nice to read that other mom’s aren’t always happy in one way or another so you don’t feel so alone. It is especially nice when you are a new mom and everyone around you makes you feel like shit because of your feelings… I have a page on my blog especially for vents about motherhood! So other people can leave their stories and people can read knowing they aren’t alone.
We are here for you!!!
Sandy’s last blog post..“I’m Still a Kid”
Jess
April 1, 2008 at 8:42 am
Same Same. Sometimes I struggle to be completely honest because I still worry about the judgement. But then remind myself that I can’t remember ever reading a post that was bitingly truthful where I felt even an ounce of reproval.
Jess’s last blog post..Some things that I just don’t understand
andi
April 1, 2008 at 9:07 am
Beautifully said. And what a great choice for perfect post!
andi’s last blog post..The origins of the bruise and a bonus anecdote
Mommy Daisy
Twitter: mommydaisy
April 1, 2008 at 9:33 am
You’re so right, I think we all seek this. I think it’s harder to find in real life, though. We are more open on the internet for whatever reason. But I love my community of mommy bloggers.
Sarah (Semi-Desperate Housewife) is one of my faovrites. I think she’s a great writer, and you’re right in that post was perfect. I’m lucky to know Sarah IRL and she’s a great person. She’s the one who inspired me to start blogging, even if I’m not nearly as good of a write as she is. I’m OK with that. I’ll sit back and enjoy my new friends anyway.
Mommy Daisy’s last blog post..Tips of the trade
tommie
April 1, 2008 at 9:50 am
i think that is what keeps bringing me back to blogging.: knowing that I am not the only one doing this!
Happy Tuesday….is the visitor finally gone?
tommie’s last blog post..Manic and Muffin Monday…..lemon ricotta muffins
Rhea
April 1, 2008 at 10:46 am
I agree that blogs have a wonderful purpose in uniting people through their thoughts, feelings and experiences. It’s such a creative and emotional outlet for those of us blogging, validation for those of us reading. I enjoy the funny posts, but the real meat is when someone shares intimate feelings that wake us up. Thanks!
Rhea’s last blog post..The Mystery Photo – Answer
CourtneyRyan
April 1, 2008 at 10:46 am
Glad that we could help. Hope today is better.
CourtneyRyan’s last blog post..Alabama Update.
amanda
April 1, 2008 at 10:48 am
thanks for sharing – it really is a perfect post!!
and thanks for always helping me find validation!
amanda’s last blog post..tag – i’m it again
justmylife
April 1, 2008 at 11:11 am
Having older kids, I see exactly what I went through. I wish I would have had blogging when my kids were small. I constantly felt like I was a bad mom, now I see that I was and am a normal mom. With all the ups and downs and mood swings. I’m glad there is a community to lean on when I am feeling really incompetent!
justmylife’s last blog post..100+post!
Queen of Shake Shake
April 1, 2008 at 11:33 am
I always do what Le Binky Bitch tells me to do. Off to read!
Queen of Shake Shake’s last blog post..Howdy Neighbor!
Devan
April 1, 2008 at 11:44 am
oooh yes, I loved that post. Good pick!
Devan’s last blog post..Baby post!
Jerseygirl89
April 1, 2008 at 7:51 pm
Oh, I know exactly what you mean about the validation and the joy I felt when I found out that I wasn’t “the only one”. And good pick!
Jerseygirl89’s last blog post..I’m Sorry
GHD
April 1, 2008 at 9:26 pm
Reading blogs like yours and many others is like a giant gratifying exhale. It such a comfort, so please write, write, write…
You never know whose heart you’re going to touch or whose day you’re going to improve with your heartfelt and honest words.
GHD’s last blog post..Keep It Your To Yourself
Rachel
April 1, 2008 at 11:50 pm
Oh how I understand!!! I truely truely do! And my dear internet friend this is why I hardly remeber to blog…I have 1, count them 1 reader, Lame.
Rachel’s last blog post..Little old me
This Post Brought to You By the Makers of Poise Pads | Playgroups are No Place For Children
April 2, 2008 at 5:07 am
[...] Validation [...]
MizFit
April 2, 2008 at 12:15 pm
like therapy blogging is ALL ABOUT being normalized for me as well.
M.
MizFit’s last blog post..Viewer Mail.
HRH
April 5, 2008 at 11:32 am
Yeah for the mommyblogging network that gets us through a rough time (daily).
HRH’s last blog post..Open oven, Insert Holly’s head…