Thanks to Neil from Citizen of the Month for this week’s Haiku Friday theme…Write like the opposite sex. Mine is full of cliches and stereotypes! Enjoy!
E.S.P.N. time
Sit back, relax, *SEX*, drink beer
Is my wife talking?
Damn! “Pick up my socks!”
All she does *SEX* is nag me
I’ll just ignore her
*SEX* I’m sure hungry
Maybe if I whine enough
Wife will bring me snacks
I work HARD all day
Can’t the kids play somewhere else?
I sure am horny
Look at Wife folding
*SEX* laundry. I should grope her!
What?! What did I do?!
Oh great. Now she’s pissed.
Can’t I get some affection?
She used to be fun.
*SEX* Women’s soccer!
They should take their clothes off *SEX*
Why’s Wife mad again?????
To play along for Haiku Friday, follow these steps:
1. Write your own haiku on your blog. You can do one or many, all following a theme or just random. What’s a haiku, you ask? Click here.
2. Sign the Mister Linky below with your name and the link to your haiku post (the specific post URL, not your generic blog URL). We will delete your link if it doesn’t go to a haiku. If you need help with this, contact Christina or myself. REMEMBER…ONLY sign Mr. Linky if you have a HAIKU POST.
3. Pick up a Haiku Friday button to display on the post or in your sidebar by clicking the button above.
Maggie's Mind
May 30, 2008 at 12:11 am
That’s hilarious! So true.
Mine’s all serious and not from the man point of view, but these are awesome
Maggie’s Mind’s last blog post..Haiku Friday 5/30/08
Jen
May 30, 2008 at 12:50 am
LMBO!! That’s funny!
Jen’s last blog post..Smile. Say Thank You. Move On.
Jill
May 30, 2008 at 1:03 am
Hey… you know WAY too much about my husband…
Jill’s last blog post..I Broke The Promise To My Tush…
tulipmom
May 30, 2008 at 1:26 am
Right on!
And they start so young ….. earlier this evening I found SB lying on the couch watching “Junkyard Wars” and playing with himself. G-d help me!
tulipmom’s last blog post..Here’s What I Know Now
Sarcastic Mom
Twitter: SarcasticMomLC
May 30, 2008 at 1:40 am
LMAOOOOOOOOO
I<3You.
(I didn’t theme it, but I had something important to write about!)
Sarcastic Mom’s last blog post..I’m a wuss-bag.
dysfunctional mom
May 30, 2008 at 2:31 am
There was nowhere near enough *SEX* in that haiku for it to be realistic!
But I’m still ROFLMAO!!
dysfunctional mom’s last blog post..Wordless Wednesday ~ I love this one…
Angie
May 30, 2008 at 5:10 am
OMG! No truer words have ever been spoken. Fantastic!
Angie’s last blog post..Ham
MizFit
May 30, 2008 at 5:26 am
dang it.
I got nothing but to echo everyone elses TOO PERFECT sentiments.
oh well.
there you go.
MizFit’s last blog post..Link Love and a Friday FREEBIE!
~JJ!
May 30, 2008 at 5:31 am
Oh that’s too funny.
I need themes…I need to add her to my reader….
~JJ!’s last blog post..Sigh ‘ku
~JJ!
May 30, 2008 at 5:31 am
Oops…Neil is a him I assume? I thought it said Nell.
Sorry.
~JJ!’s last blog post..Sigh ‘ku
Mandy
May 30, 2008 at 5:41 am
Brilliant! Brilliant! Brilliant!
You hit the nail on the head with that one.
Mandy’s last blog post..Haiku Friday – Tools rock
Mom24
May 30, 2008 at 5:57 am
Soooo funny! I just did not feel up to this challenge. You captured it really well though. Kudos.
Mom24’s last blog post..Summertime and the living is…
wright
May 30, 2008 at 6:12 am
Too funny! Only my hubby doesn’t watch ESPN, he watches the tech channel. Ugh too boring for me!
wright’s last blog post..Haiku Friday – Missing Her
Cathy
May 30, 2008 at 6:19 am
That’s great.
I’m hoping nobody gets offended by mine.
Cathy’s last blog post..Quinn Quotes
Anne
Twitter: AnneBtweets
May 30, 2008 at 6:19 am
Yep, that sounds about right!
Anne’s last blog post..Haiku Friday: Sex and a Man’Ku
Anglophile Football Fanatic
May 30, 2008 at 6:40 am
Since mine’s got no libido, I couldn’t write the sex part, but most of what you have, I mentioned. Is this a universal thing?
Also, can you delete my first Mr Linky? It was late, and I apparently can’t type my own site.
Anglophile Football Fanatic’s last blog post..Man Ku
Karen MEG
May 30, 2008 at 6:50 am
That was great!!! Love the *subliminal* sex LOL!
Karen MEG’s last blog post..“No Baby” Story – Part I and a Fashion Friday coda
Kelley
May 30, 2008 at 6:59 am
*snort* replace ESPN with some geeky computer thingy and you have my husband…
Kelley’s last blog post..Duuuude! Point that thing outside.
DesignHER Momma
Twitter: designhermomma
May 30, 2008 at 7:00 am
oh too funny….and just a little too true.
Toni
May 30, 2008 at 7:07 am
My husband is more of a sci-fi channel guy but the groping is spot on, sistah!
Toni’s last blog post..Retrospective
Jennifer
Twitter: playgroupie
May 30, 2008 at 7:09 am
This post isn’t based on Tate! Nooooo! He’s NOTHING like this.
*ahem*
In addition to ESPN, you could add History Channel, the Military Channel, and Outdoor Life Network.
*head explodes*
Christina
May 30, 2008 at 7:44 am
Hahaha! this is TOO FUNNY!
Christina’s last blog post..The night shift
Lisa
May 30, 2008 at 7:45 am
Oh my! How true LOL
janelle
May 30, 2008 at 7:50 am
omg, i’m so lmao!!!! you’re hilarious!!!!
janelle’s last blog post..Haiku Friday
AndreAnna
May 30, 2008 at 7:52 am
You crack me up!
Molly Golightly
May 30, 2008 at 8:00 am
Too funny!
Molly Golightly’s last blog post..Haiku Friday: Severe Thunderstorm Edition
Sue
May 30, 2008 at 8:02 am
LMAO- that is a hilarious haiku. And so sadly true. Because I am a meme/tag retard, I can’t participate, but…watchin’ from the sidelines as usual.
Sue’s last blog post..Rachel Ray is a Terrorist
MommyCosm
Twitter: mommycosm
May 30, 2008 at 8:05 am
OK, I haven’t put my haiku yet, but this is SOOOOO funny…mainly because it is TRUE, TRUE, TRUE.
MommyCosm’s last blog post..Can’t Wait to get LOST
phyllis
May 30, 2008 at 8:09 am
that is too funny.
phyllis’s last blog post..And thus begins Numbers…
Madness
May 30, 2008 at 8:51 am
Somehow.. 5 years after the birth of our 5th baby..after I turned 30.. MY *sex* drive went through the roof and off the charts.. its insane. No *IM* the one thinking … sex sex sex.. nuts. *giggle* i said nuts. Thank Goodness my tubes are tied or we’d have 10 kids by now.
Madness’s last blog post..~*~MadStory Time~*~
Marylin
May 30, 2008 at 9:04 am
Hehehe That was great
Marylin’s last blog post..Pondering is a bad thing to do…
Devan
May 30, 2008 at 9:17 am
Omg. That is hilarious! *sex* You are too funnY!
Devan’s last blog post..12 days old
Sarah
May 30, 2008 at 9:27 am
YEah, I forgot about the whole theme thing…I had something else take over my brain this morning *lol*
But yours is hilarious! I’m sure that’s how most men’s minds work…my husband certainly uses the “if I whine enough maybe she’ll make me a snack” thought process!!
Sarah’s last blog post..Hai-Ku’d You Get Some Common Sense
the planet of janet
Twitter: planetofjanet
May 30, 2008 at 9:34 am
right freakin’ on, dude.
let’s have a beer.
the planet of janet’s last blog post..Haiku Friday: the opposite sex — loved and lost — edition
AMomTwoBoys
May 30, 2008 at 9:56 am
Bwah ha ha ha ha. Do you know my husband somehow?
AMomTwoBoys’s last blog post..Surprise!
rachel
May 30, 2008 at 10:26 am
Dude, that was hysterical.
I drew a huge blank so I didn’t go thematic this week. Maybe next time.
Fabulous!! Can’t wait to read more!!
rachel’s last blog post..Bebe and The Brain Cancel
RubiaLala
May 30, 2008 at 11:07 am
Ha, I LOVE it! You did an excellent job.
RubiaLala’s last blog post..One Time You Broke My Rib
canape
May 30, 2008 at 11:29 am
Oooo, there are themes now. I missed that. Been gone waaaaaay too long.
canape’s last blog post..Haiku Baby Blues
justmylife
May 30, 2008 at 11:46 am
I don’t think you had sex in there enough. I believe every other word in thought with my husband is SEX!
justmylife’s last blog post..A little more of the weekend.
Kathryn
May 30, 2008 at 12:09 pm
HAHAHA!!!! This is perfect! This could have been written by my hubby!
Kathryn’s last blog post..Schmoozing
Becki
May 30, 2008 at 12:10 pm
Too funny!!
Becki’s last blog post..Another Contest!
CourtneyRyan369
May 30, 2008 at 12:11 pm
Oh gosh! Too funny. I played – sort of…
Thanks for the break in cleaning!
CourtneyRyan369’s last blog post..write like a guy?
HipMarye
May 30, 2008 at 12:22 pm
OMG , I about peed in my pants!
HipMarye’s last blog post..Valley of Fire
Jerseygirl89
May 30, 2008 at 12:25 pm
That was too funny. I missed the theme, though I did write about a guy, does that count?
Jerseygirl89’s last blog post..Haiku Friday – Sometimes The Only Word Is, “Douchebag”
amy
Twitter: amy2boys
May 30, 2008 at 1:14 pm
Best Haiku EVER!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!
amy’s last blog post..It Will Always Be Over, And Yet It Will Never End
flickrlovr
May 30, 2008 at 1:37 pm
K, so I almost peed my pants from laughing. Yeah, I laughed. Out loud. I don’t quite know where my creativity went, but it’s on vacation for the day (erm, year), so I guess I won’t even try to attempt Haiku Friday this week. Or will I? I don’t know. Not enough sleep to make coherent poems.
flickrlovr’s last blog post..GGV: Mission Aborted
SherE1
May 30, 2008 at 1:45 pm
HIlarious! Especially the groping while you’re trying to do laundry. Um, hello? Not feeling sexy at the moment – please take your hands off! Mine likes to “bother” me as I’m brushing my teeth – what the….?? =)
SherE1’s last blog post..Where my party, pa’ party party pa’ party people at?
storyteller
May 30, 2008 at 2:41 pm
Entertaining ‘Ku!
Good to laugh a bit as I
leave a link to my
forty-third Haiku
much later than I usual.
Life’s just too busy ;–)
Seriously … I’m off to write #44 now for my other blog. Just call me crazy, but it’s Friday right! So what if it’s 12:37pm already and I’m way behind on EVERYTHING At least it’s just me, Molly, and Ms. Kitty … and no ‘groping’ to contend with.
Hugs and blessings,
storyteller’s last blog post..HF#43, OSI Week 13, 40PC – Later than usual because I’m multi-tasking today with Reflections, Perspectives & Priorities — Tennis Anyone?
Mama Mia!
May 30, 2008 at 2:49 pm
I think I just peed myself a little! Freakin’ hilarious!!
Mama Mia!’s last blog post..Haiku Friday: Soooo LOST!
Queen of Shake Shake
May 30, 2008 at 5:40 pm
This is so true!
Queen of Shake Shake’s last blog post..Apparently I’m Not Brag-Worthy