There is a sinister force at work here in my home. Of this, I’m certain, because there is CLEARLY no other explanation. I still just can’t wrap my brain around what happened.
Sunday morning started out as a regular morning, nothing seemed immediately amiss. The first thing I noticed were the bits of food on the seat of the high chair. Then I saw schmeers of food all over every nook and cranny of the high chair. And then I saw corn and crackers and dried up cheese surrounding the floor around the high chair.
“How EVER could this mess have gotten there??” I thought to myself.
I was utterly confused. Here’s the thing…Saturday afternoon I left the children with Tate so that I could go see Sex and the City*, get a pedicure, and go out to dinner with some friends. Oh how wonderful it was to be responsibility free for an entire afternoon AND evening, especially since I’ve been a little overwhelmed lately. I felt comfortable leaving for SUCH a long time, knowing how well Tate would care for the children AND the house.
As I’m standing there looking at the VERY DIRTY high chair, I try to think about how on Earth this could have happened! This whole situation was so mind boggling! Surely, SURELY! Tate saw this enormous mess when he retrieved Ella from her high chair the night before. I mean, who in their right mind wouldn’t clean up such an GLARINGLY OBVIOUS mess? Certainly NOT Tate! Of course, he’d clean it up! DUH! There HAD to be some other explanation.
So how could the high chair be that dirty? **taps fingers on the counter**
With a furrowed brow and my head cocked to one side, I wondered ALOUD, “Hmmm. I WONDER why this high chair is SO DIRTY?? I KNOW Tate wouldn’t have left SUCH a filthy mess. Did a pack of ravenous toddlers run through our house last night while we were sleeping, leaving a trail of peanut butter and schmutz? HOW could this have happened? HMMMM? I’m SO bewildered.”
Apparently the sinister force at work in home leaving messes in high chairs also possessed Tate. He wasn’t able to help me brainstorm this VERY SERIOUS problem, but instead just gave me the evil eye.
*Please go see Sex and the City! I want to talk about it! I’ll wait right here for you to get back.
Shamelessly Sassy
June 3, 2008 at 12:32 am
About Sex & The City. I saw it. At a movie theatre with a bar. And I am prepared to discuss it. Holla!
Shamelessly Sassy’s last blog post..Once Bitten, Twice Fly.
Tonya
June 3, 2008 at 12:50 am
oh my, I saw it on Friday night with the girls. Loved it, loved it, loved it.
Tonya’s last blog post..ANONYMOUS MOM
Kelley
June 3, 2008 at 1:17 am
Same thing here with the mysterious messes. I came home from belly dancing last night to what looked like a warzone. Boo was holding a stick as well, so I thought he was fighting off the mess making Ninja.
MPS, as always, was oblivious to the mess.
And Dont. You. Dare. talk about SATC!!! I won’t get to see it till next week! I will let you know when I will allow discussion on the topic *snigger*
Kelley’s last blog post..Tiny hands
Rachael
June 3, 2008 at 1:55 am
Are you sure you weren’t at my house when you found the mysterious dirty high chair? Because you just described my life…
I went and saw SATC approximately five hours ago. If you want to know what I think, I just posted about it on my blog & you can comment freely there b/c my post has a spoiler alert at the top.
Rachael’s last blog post..Movie Monday: Indiana Jones, Speed Racer & Carrie Bradshaw
Trish
June 3, 2008 at 2:25 am
Men are oblivious to the mess babies and toddlers leave in their wake … I didn’t do it I don’t clean it.
Trish’s last blog post..Eating Safe
flickrlovr
June 3, 2008 at 5:30 am
Men seem to have what I like to call “selective eyesight.” And, more often than not, “selective hearing” goes right along with that. But to cut Tate some slack, maybe a pack of sugar highed, Mommy-less alien toddlers DID somehow break in and ravage through your house.
Ya never know.
Wasn’t SATC great?!? How about that shower scene? I kept thinking, naw, they won’t really show *OH* yeah, I suppose they just did. Just a little flash. Dante, Dante, Dante. His scenes sure added the Sex to SATC this time around, eh?
flickrlovr’s last blog post..Carrie Bradshaw Does Not Disappoint
alicia
June 3, 2008 at 5:44 am
Yeah, that happens quite a bit at my house. Mine are all out of high chairs, which only means they are free to smear their messes all over my house. Love it. As he obliviously plays Xbox.
alicia’s last blog post..Prince Caspian Movie and Parallels to Life.
Toni
June 3, 2008 at 6:23 am
I wish I could blame the mess that is my high schiar on my husband. Sigh
Toni’s last blog post..Romance ISN’T dead
Toni
June 3, 2008 at 6:25 am
High chair, I mean. Typing with the help of a 17 month old is not always successful.
Toni’s last blog post..Romance ISN’T dead
Cathy
June 3, 2008 at 6:37 am
Men do not clean high chairs. I hate when Mike “finishes up in the kitchen” after dinner, because that just means I have to go back in there and finish up again – or just be pissed in the morning at all the messes left behind.
Men.
Didn’t see the movie yet – trying to figure out when!!
Cathy’s last blog post..Liam 151
laurie
June 3, 2008 at 6:38 am
Leaving your kids with your (my) husband is like leaving them with a crappy babysitter who you would fire upon your return. If you got off with just a crusty high chair, sister, Tate is a dreamboat. If I left for an afternoon and evening my house would look like a pack of orangutans had redecorated it. Go hug Tate.
Mom24
June 3, 2008 at 6:54 am
I am SO JEALOUS! It would be worth coming home to a dirty high chair (although seeing as our youngest is 5, there would be some ’splainin to do), to have the evening out you had. I have no friends who watch, therefore no one to go with. *sob*
Mom24’s last blog post..100 Things
Hallie
June 3, 2008 at 7:48 am
SATC was awesome! You talk about it all you want!!
Contest over at my blog if you want to think about something other than dirty highchairs!
Hallie
http://wonderfulworldofweiners.blogspot.com/
Hallie’s last blog post..BLOG ENTRY #300!!! TIME FOR A CONTEST!!!
Kristin
Twitter: KJ_is_GFree
June 3, 2008 at 8:06 am
Sing it sista! My hubby expects a gold medal when I ask him to feed the kids. He NEVER cleans up after a meal. Feeding them is enough work, he says. Duh.
Kristin’s last blog post..Warms My Mommy Heart
Mandy
June 3, 2008 at 8:16 am
Men are blind and deaf.
How in the world do they function without us? I’m convinved that my husband has at minimum a helper dog, perhaps a monkey when he’s away for the week.
Oh wait. He’s staying with my MOM who does EVERYTHING for him, and when he comes home, he expects the same from me. Ummmm, not so much.
Mandy’s last blog post..Making a list – checking it twice
Connie
Twitter: connieaw
June 3, 2008 at 8:28 am
I agree with the crappy sitter comment!
A crappy sitter that plays Guitar Hero when I am gone! Which is what will happen tonight when I sneak away to see Sex and The City!
I am so excited!!!!!
Connie’s last blog post..Fun with Water!
Mary
June 3, 2008 at 9:24 am
I always wonder the same thing. I’ve asked how it could have happened only to hear how he “did his BEST.” How is it his best when he didnotdoit AT ALL!
I’m seeing the movie on Wednesday night- can’t wait!
Madness
June 3, 2008 at 9:38 am
I cant wait to see Sex in the City! WOOHOO!
Madness’s last blog post..Not Fighting this Fight didnt mean Go For It…but whatever..Go For It
Katia
June 3, 2008 at 9:58 am
I think my husband has some special glasses that filter out the dirt/messes. It’s amazing, really, because he also has the ability to walk OVER clean, folded laundry that I put on the stairs to go up…
Katia’s last blog post..my kickboard is wearing a thong
Marti
June 3, 2008 at 10:00 am
Oh you didn’t know? Men don’t watch kids AND clean up after them. I mean Geesh that is just TOO much for them.
I wonder how we do it. Hmmmmmm.
Val
June 3, 2008 at 10:12 am
Hey, has Tate been to my house?
Sex in the City? Is that some kind of joke? I was all set to see that Saturday night and husband had to go and have surgery just to screw with me!
Now I have to wait.
I am so sad
Val’s last blog post..Nanny Anyone?
abunslife
June 3, 2008 at 10:21 am
I saw it! You can come talk about on my site….I just gave a generic review so as not to ruin it for anyone that hadn’t seen it!
abunslife’s last blog post..Opening Night of SATC a few days late.
anymommy
June 3, 2008 at 10:29 am
I saw it on Saturday night! Loved it.
We have three strap on booster seats with trays in this house that could feed us for a week if we were trapped in our house by a natural disaster.
anymommy’s last blog post..Three Hour Chinese Sugar Torture Test
Impoverished Preppy
June 3, 2008 at 10:30 am
I was under the impression that husbands watching children for extended period involved at least two and possibly all of the following: restaurant/drive thru/pizza, DVDs, cable tv, baby sitters. Nope, sponge is NOT on the list.
Information courtesy of my husband.
Impoverished Preppy’s last blog post..When You RSVP…
Mama DB
June 3, 2008 at 10:30 am
going to see it this weekend! Can you wait that long? Should I stay far, far away from one of my favorite bloggers for almost a week???
Mama DB’s last blog post..Life Lesson
Jen
June 3, 2008 at 10:34 am
I spoke of the movie in yesterday’s post! FAB U LOUS!
Jen’s last blog post..Public Service Announcement
Sus
June 3, 2008 at 11:29 am
you’re hilarious, your sweet and wonderful husband needs to clean the bathroom too for penance, and i am going to see sex and the city just SO i can talk about it with you.
Sus’s last blog post..Friends with Dogs
Lauren
June 3, 2008 at 12:02 pm
I’m pretty sure it was me. I HATE cleaning the high chair and floor fifty million times/day.
Shelly
Twitter: shelly_overlook
June 3, 2008 at 1:25 pm
I saw SATC last night and was not disappointed.
Shelly’s last blog post..Switch
Devan
June 3, 2008 at 1:26 pm
My husband is physically incapable of cleaning up high chairs or booster seats. At least, this is the conclusion I’ve come to after 3 years of him NEVER doing it!
I hope the movie was great – I would love to see it!
Devan’s last blog post..The postpartum body
CourtneyRyan
June 3, 2008 at 1:36 pm
I have no intention of seeing Sex in the City (no offense, just wasn’t ever into it… you should all see it and enjoy it to the Nth degree!)
You know, I think it was obviously the aliens to came and made the highchair messy. Either that or someone snuck in to steal the family jewels, got distracted and made a snack. Then they sat in the highchair to eat it and made the mess. Yeah that!
CourtneyRyan’s last blog post..Letters to Subway, Karen, and the Gay Men I know…
SherE1
June 3, 2008 at 2:51 pm
I’m not seeing the movie until Friday (boo!) I’m trying to avoid all the spoilers online! =)
My husband never, EVER cleans up the high chair or surrounding areas after the baby eats. Never. I guess he thinks the high chair fairies will take care of it for him!
SherE1’s last blog post..Breakfast at Morning Star’s
Anglophile Football Fanatic
June 3, 2008 at 2:57 pm
I’m so glad mine isn’t the only one who leaves all the dishes caked with ketchup and goo for me to clean when I get home. Yay for Tate. Sonofabitch
Anglophile Football Fanatic’s last blog post..Unloading the Boxes
April
June 3, 2008 at 3:09 pm
You ought to know by now that men don’t see things like that very well. My husband will ask me where something is, I can tell him and he will tell me that he just looked and it wasn’t there. I can go to where I told him it was and boom it appeared!
April’s last blog post..OOPS!
Manager Mom
June 3, 2008 at 3:58 pm
Mmmm… I love Peanut Butter and Schmutz sandwiches…
Manager Mom’s last blog post..Little Shop Of Horrors
Rosie
June 3, 2008 at 4:23 pm
The opposite of that? Cleaning the kitchen, putting the dishes in the dishwasher, then leaving the dishwasher OPEN with the trays pulled out as if to say, LOOK WIFE! I HAVE TAKEN IT UPON MYSELF TO LOAD THE DISHWASHER!! KNEEL BEFORE ZOD.
Agh.
Rosie’s last blog post..Tell me, did you enjoy your MRI?
Carrie
June 3, 2008 at 5:07 pm
Will be in Indy and Fort Wayne (and Logansport) forth of July week. We’re thinking of going to the Zoo in Indy. So, how WAS it? The Fort Wayne one kicks butt, by the way! Anyway, if you haven’t yet, go to the Children’s Museum in Indy–it’s fantastic! Another couple mil on gas and parking, but it’s a lot of fun….
Carrie’s last blog post..Happy Anniversary!
Mrs. Who
June 3, 2008 at 5:24 pm
1. I’m glad some other people thought it was “Sex IN the city” because I thought that was the name of the show for ages. Makes perfect sense, really.
2. I went on opening night with some girlfriends (is there any other way to see that movie?) and LOVED it. Loved everything about it, including the way the audience was so totally INTO the movie. When was the last time an audience clapped at a movie? And the intake of breath when Steve said he had slept with someone else?? The entire theatre was shocked.
Maggie
June 3, 2008 at 6:26 pm
You are hilarious!
I haven’t seen the TV show Sex and the City, so I don’t know that I would get much out of the movie. I know, I know – don’t hate me. But feel free to discuss, you won’t be ruining anything for me!
Oh – and I have a Nikon – and I totally think someone should give you a DSLR – have they not seen your cute kiddos? Seriously!
Maggie’s last blog post..No Way!
Jenni
June 3, 2008 at 7:32 pm
Wait a minute. We’re supposed to clean under the high chairs? Why don’t I know these things??
Jenni’s last blog post..Warning: Stereotypical Mom Blog Post
Alison
June 3, 2008 at 7:42 pm
I saw it! And my high chair is ALWAYS dirty!!
Alison’s last blog post..Scared Shitless: Worries about Seeing the Gastroenterologist
Sarah
June 3, 2008 at 7:56 pm
*giggle* Sarcasm is such a wonderful weapon, isn’t it?
Yeah, I never have that problem with the neat freak that is my hubby…nope. I’m the messy one around here.
Sarah’s last blog post..The Budding Photographers Work
Swistle
June 3, 2008 at 8:28 pm
At times like this, Paul will say, “I have NO IDEA! Wait—what’s that over there????” (*sound of him wetting a washcloth and wiping high chair*) “Oh, I guess it’s nothing.”
Swistle’s last blog post..Pay it Forward Follow-up
Lizz @ Yes, and So is My Heart
June 3, 2008 at 9:19 pm
That was hilarious!
Our high chair looks squeaky clean on the outside, but please just DON’T peak under the cover. It is disgusting. To think that I actually used to wash it monthly.
Lizz @ Yes, and So is My Heart’s last blog post..Just a Day
Bellamomma
June 3, 2008 at 10:54 pm
SATC ROCKED!!!!
(Please explain the Anthony / Stanford part to me ~ I mean WTH?!? When / How / WHY?)
I want to blog about it SO badly ~ but I don’t want to ruin it for anyone AAAAUGH!
Bellamomma’s last blog post..As June begins the wedding stress gets higher
Christina
June 3, 2008 at 10:57 pm
That same evil force finds its way here occasionally, too. So strange…
Haven’t seen SATC yet, but want to. Maybe this weekend?
Christina’s last blog post..Breakdown in the Children’s Clothing Aisle
Sabrina
June 5, 2008 at 10:09 am
I wish I could hire someone to come in and clean my high chair. Unfortunately, I can only blame myself for allowing the mess to, uh, fester. Somehow I evaded the entire SATC franchise. Could be because we don’t have cable. Yay for nice cable man.
Sabrina’s last blog post..Happy Birthday, Baby Blog!
my minivan is faster than yours
June 12, 2008 at 12:55 pm
See it twice. Let’s get the talk on!
my minivan is faster than yourss last blog post..A Personal Note of Gratitude