Comments on: Learning compassion in the church of Chick-Fil-A http://playgroupsarenoplaceforchildren.com/2009/06/24/learning-compassion-in-the-church-of-chick-fil-a/ Wed, 23 May 2012 06:22:26 +0000 hourly 1 http://wordpress.org/?v=3.3.1 By: Stacie Haight Connerty http://playgroupsarenoplaceforchildren.com/2009/06/24/learning-compassion-in-the-church-of-chick-fil-a/comment-page-2/#comment-28266 Stacie Haight Connerty Tue, 30 Jun 2009 20:00:00 +0000 http://playgroupsarenoplaceforchildren.com/?p=1406#comment-28266 Wow! That is a tough one. I am not sure what I would have done either. I think that I would have felt the same way at first, too. I do want my children to learn how to interact with everyone and to learn compassion. Thanks for a great post. .-= Stacie Haight Connerty´s last blog ..<a href="http://feedproxy.google.com/~r/thedivinemissmommy/TfFt/~3/uPwsjDWzvpY/" rel="nofollow">Wordless Wednesday - Angel Imposter</a> =-. Wow! That is a tough one. I am not sure what I would have done either. I think that I would have felt the same way at first, too.

I do want my children to learn how to interact with everyone and to learn compassion.

Thanks for a great post.
.-= Stacie Haight Connerty´s last blog ..Wordless Wednesday – Angel Imposter =-.

]]> By: laura @ peacoat http://playgroupsarenoplaceforchildren.com/2009/06/24/learning-compassion-in-the-church-of-chick-fil-a/comment-page-2/#comment-28250 laura @ peacoat Mon, 29 Jun 2009 15:43:27 +0000 http://playgroupsarenoplaceforchildren.com/?p=1406#comment-28250 it's probably just my own raging pregnancy hormones, but this made me tear up a little. great post. .-= laura @ peacoat´s last blog ..<a href="http://www.peacoatpapers.com/2009/06/am-i-killing-the-baby.html" rel="nofollow">am i killing the baby?</a> =-. it’s probably just my own raging pregnancy hormones, but this made me tear up a little.

great post.
.-= laura @ peacoat´s last blog ..am i killing the baby? =-.

]]> By: Secret Agent Mama http://playgroupsarenoplaceforchildren.com/2009/06/24/learning-compassion-in-the-church-of-chick-fil-a/comment-page-2/#comment-28245 Secret Agent Mama Mon, 29 Jun 2009 13:41:19 +0000 http://playgroupsarenoplaceforchildren.com/?p=1406#comment-28245 Remembering compassion starts with realizations like this. Great post, Jennifer. .-= Secret Agent Mama´s last blog ..<a href="http://feedproxy.google.com/~r/SecretAgentMama/~3/-F3uL7hjX4Y/" rel="nofollow">Weekly Winners LXXXIII</a> =-. Remembering compassion starts with realizations like this.

Great post, Jennifer.
.-= Secret Agent Mama´s last blog ..Weekly Winners LXXXIII =-.

]]> By: kate http://playgroupsarenoplaceforchildren.com/2009/06/24/learning-compassion-in-the-church-of-chick-fil-a/comment-page-2/#comment-28244 kate Mon, 29 Jun 2009 05:07:02 +0000 http://playgroupsarenoplaceforchildren.com/?p=1406#comment-28244 Lynn, for a few years, starting when my son was 3, I babysat a boy, Andy, with Autism and at first I thought it would be very hard for my son to understand and to be able to behave accordingly. I found that I was not giving my boy enough credit. He was more than able to understand the difference (without treating Andy like there was sonething 'wrong' with him when he acted in a way that was unexpected) and fully capable and willing to accomodate Andy's needs (for example, Andy was very agitated by loud noises and, after I explained that to my 3 year old, he was always very conscious of the volume of his play). I think that kids take their cues from us, the parents. If they see us gawking or gossiping or the dirty looks for the 'bad' kid with the 'bad' mom (and kids don't miss a thing) then we are teaching them that it's okay for them to be like that when they see someone who may be having a bad day, or may be different, or need some help. As far as specifically answering your child's questions about autism (or anything else), I would suggest researching it either together or on your own and then talk about it together. Here's a link to get you started: http://stevens_mom.tripod.com/id44.html Lynn, for a few years, starting when my son was 3, I babysat a boy, Andy, with Autism and at first I thought it would be very hard for my son to understand and to be able to behave accordingly. I found that I was not giving my boy enough credit. He was more than able to understand the difference (without treating Andy like there was sonething ‘wrong’ with him when he acted in a way that was unexpected) and fully capable and willing to accomodate Andy’s needs (for example, Andy was very agitated by loud noises and, after I explained that to my 3 year old, he was always very conscious of the volume of his play).
I think that kids take their cues from us, the parents. If they see us gawking or gossiping or the dirty looks for the ‘bad’ kid with the ‘bad’ mom (and kids don’t miss a thing) then we are teaching them that it’s okay for them to be like that when they see someone who may be having a bad day, or may be different, or need some help.

As far as specifically answering your child’s questions about autism (or anything else), I would suggest researching it either together or on your own and then talk about it together. Here’s a link to get you started:
http://stevens_mom.tripod.com/id44.html

]]> By: Lynn http://playgroupsarenoplaceforchildren.com/2009/06/24/learning-compassion-in-the-church-of-chick-fil-a/comment-page-2/#comment-28243 Lynn Mon, 29 Jun 2009 04:33:05 +0000 http://playgroupsarenoplaceforchildren.com/?p=1406#comment-28243 I am curious if you or any readers have any words of wisdom on how to explain "David's" behavior to your children in a way the would understand. My son has an autistic boy in his Sunday School class and I am not sure how to explain it to him. I am curious if you or any readers have any words of wisdom on how to explain “David’s” behavior to your children in a way the would understand. My son has an autistic boy in his Sunday School class and I am not sure how to explain it to him.

]]> By: WhyMommy http://playgroupsarenoplaceforchildren.com/2009/06/24/learning-compassion-in-the-church-of-chick-fil-a/comment-page-2/#comment-28240 WhyMommy Sun, 28 Jun 2009 18:56:49 +0000 http://playgroupsarenoplaceforchildren.com/?p=1406#comment-28240 Chills. You're right. Absolutely right. I hope things went better for her the rest of the day. Chills. You’re right. Absolutely right.

I hope things went better for her the rest of the day.

]]> By: Mother Chaos http://playgroupsarenoplaceforchildren.com/2009/06/24/learning-compassion-in-the-church-of-chick-fil-a/comment-page-2/#comment-28235 Mother Chaos Sun, 28 Jun 2009 04:26:46 +0000 http://playgroupsarenoplaceforchildren.com/?p=1406#comment-28235 My youngest is mildly autistic - he's almost five, but socially/behaviorally, more like two. I've SO been 'that' mom. It's a horrible, horrible feeling, too. All eyes on you, all eyes accusing you of being a rotten parent, the shifty sideways glances saying, "MY child would never do that!" Seriously - thanks for the compassion. It helps to think that maybe a FEW of the witnesses to my shame and frustration might later realize I'm carrying something a little heavier than mere brattiness on my shoulders. :) .-= Mother Chaos´s last blog ..<a href="http://www.denofchaos.com/2009/06/mommy-v-buydoobah-smackdown.html" rel="nofollow">Mommy v. Buydoobah: The Smackdown</a> =-. My youngest is mildly autistic – he’s almost five, but socially/behaviorally, more like two. I’ve SO been ‘that’ mom. It’s a horrible, horrible feeling, too. All eyes on you, all eyes accusing you of being a rotten parent, the shifty sideways glances saying, “MY child would never do that!”

Seriously – thanks for the compassion. It helps to think that maybe a FEW of the witnesses to my shame and frustration might later realize I’m carrying something a little heavier than mere brattiness on my shoulders. :)
.-= Mother Chaos´s last blog ..Mommy v. Buydoobah: The Smackdown =-.

]]> By: kate http://playgroupsarenoplaceforchildren.com/2009/06/24/learning-compassion-in-the-church-of-chick-fil-a/comment-page-2/#comment-28225 kate Sat, 27 Jun 2009 05:20:59 +0000 http://playgroupsarenoplaceforchildren.com/?p=1406#comment-28225 This makes me so sad. I used to babysit a little boy who had autism, and I remember things like this happening (the catty moms, i mean) once in a while. It used to make me so angry because once you knew him, you knew that he wouldn't hurt anyone. There was nothing "wrong with him", what was wrong was the way everyone would react to him and his differences. What was wrong was the way his parents were alienated by others who would rather gossip and judge instead of reaching out. It's no wonder the Mom in your story was so tired looking- tired of dealing with b.s. from the Moms who treat her like she's a bad Mom or like she's parenting her kid 'wrong' based on her child being different. What a sad and lonely way to go through the day. This makes me so sad. I used to babysit a little boy who had autism, and I remember things like this happening (the catty moms, i mean) once in a while. It used to make me so angry because once you knew him, you knew that he wouldn’t hurt anyone. There was nothing “wrong with him”, what was wrong was the way everyone would react to him and his differences. What was wrong was the way his parents were alienated by others who would rather gossip and judge instead of reaching out. It’s no wonder the Mom in your story was so tired looking- tired of dealing with b.s. from the Moms who treat her like she’s a bad Mom or like she’s parenting her kid ‘wrong’ based on her child being different.
What a sad and lonely way to go through the day.

]]> By: Amy http://playgroupsarenoplaceforchildren.com/2009/06/24/learning-compassion-in-the-church-of-chick-fil-a/comment-page-1/#comment-28191 Amy Fri, 26 Jun 2009 15:29:32 +0000 http://playgroupsarenoplaceforchildren.com/?p=1406#comment-28191 Snarky Mom, your son sounds similar to mine. Mine is 5, with the body of a 7 year old but the maturity of a 3 year old (immature 4 on a good day. lol). Snarky Mom, your son sounds similar to mine. Mine is 5, with the body of a 7 year old but the maturity of a 3 year old (immature 4 on a good day. lol).

]]> By: patois http://playgroupsarenoplaceforchildren.com/2009/06/24/learning-compassion-in-the-church-of-chick-fil-a/comment-page-1/#comment-28186 patois Fri, 26 Jun 2009 14:51:16 +0000 http://playgroupsarenoplaceforchildren.com/?p=1406#comment-28186 Having had a different kid -- although not one so "obviously" different -- I nearly cried reading this. .-= patois´s last blog ..<a href="http://www.wheeallthewayhome.com/2009/06/baby-comeback.html" rel="nofollow">Baby, Comeback!</a> =-. Having had a different kid — although not one so “obviously” different — I nearly cried reading this.
.-= patois´s last blog ..Baby, Comeback! =-.

]]>