Tate and I have been going through a rough patch lately, the kind where the fact that we simply breathe in the same room as one another is more than enough to send smoke steaming out of our ears and invisible daggers to be shot from our eyes.
I certainly don’t keep score, NO! NOT ME! Why, I would NEVER EVER count the number of times he’s been late coming home from work, or the number of weapons he’s bought in the past year, or the child-free time he’s had, away from the children, away from responsibilities, away from THE CHILDREN (oops, sorry for the redundancy there), or the socks that, OH MY GOD THE DAMN SOCKS, he’s left lying in the middle of the floor. That would be really immature.
I’m obviously the better spouse in this relationship. *snort*
One of the things that has been bugging me lately is that Tate starts these routines with the kids that I end up having to uphold because I always hate being the bad guy I want to be the cool parent, too I can’t stand the crying from the children. One of the things he’s started is that every night as we go downstairs for bath time, Tate offers to carry Carson on his shoulders. Poor Ella stands at the top of the stairs, heartbroken and wailing. “I wanna ride! I wan *SOB* na *SOB* ride *SOB*!” Tate will call to me, “Ella wants to ride on your shoulders, Mommy!”
Nevermind, I’m just trying to finish cleaning up the dinner dishes or cleaning up SOMEBODY’S socks or *gasp* trying to steal a moment alone. My hand, well my shoulders really, have been forced. I can’t just let her cry like that! She’s immediately scooped up and placed on my shoulders so that her wee little heart can be mended.
Carson, my beloved, beloved Carson, evened things out for me the other night. Occasionally when Carson gets really excited, he hates to take a break to use the potty. Sometimes he has a little accident before getting to the toilet. The other night, atop Tate’s shoulders, Carson had one of those little accidents and peed on Tate’s neck.
Man I love that kid!
(Doesn’t Carson look like he saying the f-word?!)
BWAHAHAHAHAHA!!!
I love it!
.-= Amo´s last blog ..Last Week in Pictures =-.
I love it! My husband always makes rules too and expects me to follow them since I’m the one home eleventy bazillion hours a day with them. I finally told him if he wants to make up stupid rules then he needs to stay home to enforce them.
.-= Kristin´s last blog ..V-A-C-A-T-I-O-N in the summertime =-.
Aw, sorry you guys are going through a rough patch. Those are no fun at all :-/
Love that Carsons helping you keep the score even though. LOL!
.-= MommyNamedApril´s last blog ..Woot Woot! =-.
hahaha!
.-= Devan´s last blog ..A few months ago =-.
ah. the rough patch. i love when little things happen to even it out a little.
my husband got peed on the other day too. when he inquired if it ever happens to me … i quietly shook my head.
he tends to make up rules and then leave on a weeklong trip as soon as they need to be enforced. argh.
.-= jen´s last blog ..home. =-.
Ah! Sweet revenge. Thanks for the laugh.
.-= Formerly Gracie ´s last blog ..Scenes from a Fabulous Fourth of July =-.
I so needed this today. Thank you, thank you, thank you.
That is hilarious! Tate totally deserved it, I’m sure!
Karma is a bitch, and she totally sides with The Wife 99.9% of the time. LOVE IT!
.-= Burgh Baby´s last blog ..The Sands of Time Make an Appearance at Gap =-.
I very much resent the time my husband has to himself. He owns his own business and has tremendous flexibility during the weekdays – hours and even whole days where he can do whatever he wants. For me work starts when I get up and ends when the kids are in bed (after 9:30 right now) and then it’s too late and I’m too tired to do anything.
When I get home and the house is a wreck and he comes in at 8:30 from biking in the countryside while I’ve been working all day and breaking up the kids arguments all evening, I nearly can’t stand it. He wonders why I don’t exercise. This makes me INSANE. When would I?
.-= amy2boys´s last blog ..Mediterranean Ravioli =-.
I hear you on the socks. How hard is it to pick up socks? Or a towel or soda can or shirt or… The list could go on.
.-= Crystal´s last blog ..Weekly Winners Vol. 2: Damn Tourist Edition =-.
Oh my gosh — I could have written that frustrations list myself! I’m sure most of us moms could identify with many of them, but I also get the WEAPONS one. What is up with men and their weapons. My husband and a couple of his friends are all about the weapons, shooting ranges, parts for the weapons, etc. It drives me a little crazy, but I know that he could have worse hobbies. I would just love the be able to call up and say I’m going to spend a few hours enjoying MY new hobby…… He would die (or call my mom to watch the kids).
Wow, I hate those rough spots, and I’ve certainly been there…again and again.
My youngest two are 6 and 8, too bad. Otherwise I think I’d pay one of them to have one of those accidents. Oh well, at least I can chuckle just thinking about it.
.-= Mom24@4evermom´s last blog ..Update… =-.
You both need to do nice things for each other. Works every time. Neither of you need to be so critical. Is it worth it if one of you dies?
Honestly, both of you need to work together and think more of each other. Marriage only works when we aren’t selfish.
.-= Knot´s last blog ..I need to hear from you =-.
i have an idea:
STOCKADE.
MORE.
WEAPONS.
Could work.
Worth a try!
.-= marymac´s last blog ..Red White and Boobs =-.
HA! I saw it coming about a sentence before you said it. I think you win that one.
I tend to fall in the same category as Nate at times. I’m just so used to wife taking care of Tyler when I’m at work, that I just “allow” it to continue when I get home. Luckily, I try to be as observant to that as possible and give wife her breaks. She’ll say I have room for improvement still, and I’ll say that I’ve improved 100-fold. To-may-to, to-mah-to
.-= Joe @ IrrationalDad´s last blog ..The Face of Crazy =-.
Rough patch? me too.
I’m betting part of yours has to do with the fact that you’re leaving next weekend for blogher. Lots of huffing and puffing coming from the man of the house? Or am I wrong. Not that it matters…
Rough patches just suck.
.-= Cathy´s last blog ..Happy Monday! =-.
Revenge is sweet!
My husband breathes too, and it drives me crazy.
.-= Stimey´s last blog ..CSCA*: Week 3—"Ology" Week =-.
Priceless!
.-= Mrs. Schmitty´s last blog ..Not Always What It’s Cracked Up To Be =-.
I’m sorry for your rough patch. I think you need a pair of earplugs, so when your daughter starts crying you can just shrug and tell your husband, “she’s all yours”. Maybe if he had to walk up and down the stairs twice, he’d stop. Although, the peeing on the head was good too. ; )
.-= Fairly Odd Mother´s last blog ..It Could Have Been Worse: he could’ve said this to me. =-.
Sweet revenge! Yeah. My husband, who is out fishing right this very minute, is on my nerve, too. Last week on vacation, I got exactly 42 minutes to myself ALL WEEK. (As you can see, I also do not keep score.) My mother in law even noticed and was like “So when do you get a break?” Gr.
.-= Jen L.´s last blog ..18 months =-.
Just want to say that I am so sorry you are going through this with your husband. I have been there too. A lot. Try watching fireproof together, reevaluate, reprioritize, discuss where you are and where you are going. It can only help! Good luck.
.-= mandy´s last blog ..been a while…I know =-.
Carson may have earned himself a little sumpin’ special for coming to Mom’s rescue.
Hope you two can work things out.
.-= Tara R.´s last blog ..We are not alone =-.
Ha ha ha ha ha!!!! N
You are SO hilarious. So right too. What is UP with men and socks!? It BUGS THE CRAP out of me when I have to pick up his frickin tightey whiteys off the bathroom floor after he’s had a shower/bath, and can’t simply place them in the laundry basket. IT’s like a direct assault on me – as if each time he does it, I picture him doing it with an air of “yeah, let’s keep that beeyatch busy just a little bit more” back at the ranch I realise that he’s just a dumb man that can’t follow the simplest of instructions. GRRRRRR. Maybe we should all become lesbians. ha ha ha ha ha.
This is my new favorite post of all time. Thank you.
Rough patch? Well, I guess we all go through them. Just make sure that, in getting through it, you BOTH make the necessary compromises. If one or the other winds up thinking that they’re giving more than the other, to make things work, then resentment builds and that is never, ever, a good thing.
.-= lceel´s last blog ..A little STUFF =-.
the best.
the absolute best.
oh. and did i say … the best????
.-= the planet of janet´s last blog ..Too kool for skool =-.
Hehe…love the justice there.
And I hate when we get out of sync…hope you find your stride together again soon.
.-= Michelle Smiles´s last blog ..Momma’s girl vs Daddy’s girl =-.
I’ve been reading (ok, stalking) your blog for quite some time. I loved today’s entry. I love it that you and your husband aren’t perfect and that your kids aren’t perfect – and that you tell people that in your blog.
My husband and I are going throug a terrible time right now and I haven’t said anything about it on my blogs. I think I would need to start a third blog to write all the shit that’s been going on with us!!
Anyway, thanks for being an honest, REAL person!
.-= April´s last blog ..Not So "DARING" After All =-.
You’re evil – and I love it!
Seriously, though. You need some alone time – and then you need a weekend alone with your husband. Try to reconnect before the resentment builds too much. Been there, will probably be there again sometime in the future, but right now? Being on the same page makes life SO much more enjoyable.
.-= Ashlie- Mommycosm´s last blog ..8 years =-.
Just a quick note about my marriage….
I truly appreciate all the concern and advice. Tate and I go through these patches, like MOST couples. Maybe there are couples out there that truly can stay connected all the time, but I think those marriages are few and far between and consist of two people who have very laid back personalities.
I agree that we should be nice to each other and that we should reprioritize and all that other marriage “advice.” We will, we’ll get away, we’ll watch the move Fireproof, we’ll make an effort towards putting the other person first. It will get better. But I also know that it will also go through another rough patch in the future. THAT is marriage, it’s the ups and downs, it’s the sickness and health.
April, Thank you! I write these posts so I’ll get comments like this and know that we’re not the only ones who go through tough times and have kids that pee on our necks. Glad you commented today!
John Deere Mom, You are welcome!
Ness, That really isn’t all that bad of an idea!
Fairly Odd Mother, Earplugs, huh?! Hadn’t thought of that. I’ll have Tate bring some home from work so that he can be a part of his own demise!
Stimey, Men and their damn breathing. Sheesh.
Cathy, It’s certainly a point of contention. Loooooong story behind it. This is definitely an area that I’m beyond trying to compromise!
Beth, You are welcome!
Ugh. Clue-Less. Next time, in your best fairytale voice, say “Daddy is so big and strong, I bet he can carry both of you AT ONCE!!!
.-= juliet´s last blog ..The Madoff Follies =-.
I think most couples have a rough time when their kids are little (whether they admit it publicly or not). Hang in there.
Revenge is sweet!
.-= Leighann´s last blog ..Overheard: Growing Up Too Quickly Edition =-.
Too funny! I would never be lucky enough for my kids to do something like that to my hubby!
Holy hells bells! I’m sorry Tate but that is the funniest thing ever.
.-= rachel-asouthernfairytale´s last blog ..Almost Pasta Carbonara =-.
I hate those patches. Ditto about going through them. Damn, I wish my kids were still old enough to give me such a pleasure as your boy did.
.-= patois´s last blog ..The Stranger: Haiku =-.
LOL Gotta love mom kid revenge..
.-= Kimberly´s last blog ..MckLinky Weekly Blog Hop #2 – Favorite Photo =-.
*snort*giggle*snort*
That is the most fantastical payback that I have heard of in a long time.
.-= Mad Woman´s last blog ..I’ve got a lovely bunch of coconuts =-.
FANTASTIC.
.-= Heather´s last blog ..Reminded. =-.