ATTENTION THOSE OF YOU WHO GOOGLED “p0RN”. GO AWAY. THIS IS ABOUT VACUUM CLEANERS, NO SMUT HERE.
GO AWAY.
Welcome to another addition of happy homemaking with Jennifer. I swear, you guys, that I do actually think of more than dishwashing, laundry, toilet paper…and today vacuums.
Let’s talk about Dysons, shall we?
Here’s the thing.
I covet a Dyson, yet as you recall I’m cheap and I want to be absolutely sure that I won’t be wasting my money. Reading through page after page of reviews on the Dyson, I’m definitely not sold.
Several reviews read something like this:
“I’ve owned my Dyson for two days and haven’t stopped vacuuming! It’s given me multiple orgasms!”
Or
“Dyson and I are meant for each other! We just met an hour ago, but OMG that vacuum can SUCK.”
Then come the more experienced Dyson owners, and their reviews aren’t as (after)glowing:
“I’ve had my Dyson for a year and the initial passion has died out. Now he’s heavy, drinks like a fish, and stays out all night gambling.”
Or
“My Dyson’s attachments just aren’t long enough to please me.”
So obviously I need your help. I want to hear from those you who have Dysons. I don’t want to hear from you if you’ve had your Dyson for less than 6 months and are still basking in all it’s glory. (Well OF COURSE I want to hear from you and receive your life sustaining comments!) I really want to hear from those of you whose relationship with their Dyson has moved passed the initial hot passion stage and into the long-term commitment stage.
Is the excitement still there? What are the pros and cons? Is it truly like vacuum p0rn or does the passion fizzle with time?
So go ahead, convince me that a Dyson is worth the money and that I’ll mess myself every time I use it because it’s just that good.
Also I’d be interested in hearing about any other vacuum cleaners that make your heart race and face flush, you know, in case this Dyson thing doesn’t work out for me.























