Playgroups are No Place for Children

Christmas Arrives Unexpectedly, Surprising Families Everywhere

Written on December 20, 2011 by Jennifer in Quirky Me, Randomness

I’ve seen at least a million status updates or tweets referring to the shock that Christmas is THIS SUNDAY! OH EM GEE!

It’s amazing that a holiday that for centuries has been on December 25th, can completely floor us with it’s arrival. If there wasn’t so much to do to prepare for this one twenty-four hour period, maybe we would feel better prepared for it’s arrival?

The good news is that I am 100% done with shopping. (Imagine that I’m doing the Arsenio Hall arm pump thingy accompanied by some hooting.) However, I’m not done wrapping, meal planning, or cleaning. I was kinda sorta hoping for your help, kind reader, with the meal planning part.

We have already had one Christmas with Tate’s side of the family where we served turkey AND we had turkey at Thanksgiving AND I’m plain sick of turkey. One of our Christmas guests doesn’t eat ham. I’m completely baffled about what I should make for our Christmas dinner! My husband suggested venison. I suggested he stop talking nonsense.

Do you have any good ideas for what I could serve? Please and THANK YOU.

(photo source)

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If you’re one of those people who’s already done with cookingcleaningshoppingwrapping and are looking for some most excellent reads, here are a few to keep you busy. No, no…YOU’RE welcome.

Answering the door, scantily clad, for the delivery man was at least better than Ella answering the door without me around.

We discussed eggnog here a few years back, but it’s a very, VERY important subject, yes? My son had some very pointed words to say about eggnog.

I was interviewed at Care.com regarding my thoughts on New Year’s resolutions. I think your early resolution could be to click RIGHT HERE.

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The moral of the story is this: Don’t seek comfort with Taco Bell

Written on December 14, 2011 by Jennifer in Huh?, Quirky Me

If I showed you my calendar you might weep. Everyday there’s a party or someone *ahem the SCHOOL* needs something for a party. There are presents to be wrapped, toilets to be scrubbed, and crafts to be completed. Don’t forget the crafts!

So this calendar o’ mine, I have very carefully coordinated each and every activity, party, and craft into every spare minute that I have. It would all be going swimmingly if it weren’t for the unexpected birthday party invitation my son received for a party on a TUESDAY night (ALL CAPS because it’s SCHOOLNIGHTOUTRAGE). My son, he was so excited about this birthday party.

“It’s at Chuck E. Cheese, Mom! I can’t wait!” he said. His giddiness equally matched my irritation.

Tuesday night I was supposed to go out with my book club and discuss books. And by “discuss books,” I really mean, stuff myself silly with chips, guacamole, and enchiladas while sipping a margarita. Topped with a TUESDAY SCHOOLNIGHTOUTRAGE birthday party, I was feeling a little sorry for myself. I mean, I’d already carefully coordinated my schedule just for the promise of Mexican food and libations. I’d turned down other parties so that I could go to this one.

Whine. Pout. Stomp. Frumple Face.

I didn’t get a chance to eat dinner before taking Carson to the party. It just wasn’t scheduled on the calendar, so by the time the party was over (8:00 on a SCHOOLNIGHTOUTRAGE), I was starving. Since my Mexican food bonanza had been cancelled, I decided that the only this that could soothe my sad, sad heart was a quick trip through the drive through at Taco Bell.

This is when a good friend sitting in the passenger seat could have really helped a girl out because a six-year-old in the backseat only serves to egg you on. A good friend would have talked me out of a trip to Taco Bell, but my son thought it was a GREAT idea.

“You LOVE tacos, Mom,” he reminded me. Indeed, that is true. I love tacos, but I really love tacos that come from places that don’t serve food out of a drive through window.

At home I devoured my Taco Bell order, dejected. I even managed to meet my goal of “stuffing myself silly,” but it didn’t take away the fact that instead of having fun at a much needed night away with friends, I spent an evening at Chuck E. Cheese with 20 kabillion very excited children. Instead of feeling better about the whole situation, I just felt gross AND sad.

The moral of the story is this: Don’t seek comfort with Taco Bell. I hope you’ll find this tip very helpful in your times of need this busy holiday season.

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Mario and Sonic and Carson and Ella at the London 2012 Olympic Games

Written on December 13, 2011 by Jennifer in Little Monkeys, playing along

We received SEGA’s family friendly game, Mario & Sonic at the London 2012 Olympic Games (affiliate link) as part of a family game night package that also included popcorn, nuts, and candy for free. I received no other compensation. All opinions are my own…and my children’s own.

Left to their own devices, my children, especially Carson, would love nothing more than to spend all day, every day playing Wii. I’ve had to set limits on Wii play, they’re only allowed to play on the weekends and only for two hours.

Both kids love all things Mario. We are well stocked with Mario games, their favorites being Mario Sports Mix and Mario Kart. These games can easily be played by young kids, unlike several games in our library that cause nothing but screaming fits because they are so complicated. I’d seen Mario & Sonic at the London 2012 Olympic Games advertised and had considered it for a Christmas gift for them, so I was VERY excited that I was contacted to review the game with the kids. When it came in the mail I just couldn’t wait until Christmas to give it to them.

Luckily Carson, age six, and Ella, age four, both easily picked up on how to play Mario & Sonic at the London 2012 Olympic Games. Ella actually loses interest pretty quickly in playing Wii, but she loves to watch her brother battle it out as one of the characters in discus, swimming, volleyball, track, and gymnastics.

Carson loves the new-to-him characters like Sonic and Vector the Crocodile. His favorite game to play is the 4 x 100 meter relay, with Sonic, Silver, Shadow, and Knuckles.

“Watch this cool trick, Mom,” he’ll say as one of the Sonic characters performs some cool stunt that puts them in the lead.

This game is apparently not just for kids. After Carson and Ella were carefully tucked in bed, I caught my husband picking up the Wii remote to play a little Mario & Sonic. I keep catching him as Sonic on the parallel bars in the gymnastics game.

This game is available for Wii right now! Which? Is perfect for Christmas! It will be available for the Nintendo 3DS in February.

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I Think Pearl Jam Can Sum Up My Feelings About Albert Pujols

Written on December 11, 2011 by Jennifer in Uncategorized

The sun came up this morning. I almost expected it to never rise again after Friday, but there it is every morning, blinding my already puffy eyes. Yesterday at the grocery store, the people around me seemed nonchalant, if not downright happy, and all I wanted to do was scream at them, “HOW CAN YOU ALL JUST GO ON LIKE NOTHING HAPPENED! Can’t you see that I’m dying on the inside?!”

But I live in Tennessee, so I guess to most people around me, nothing significant has happened. They don’t know that I, and the millions of others in Cardinals Nation, have lost the love of our lives.

On Friday, we learned that Albert Pujols, arguably the greatest baseball player of my generation, was leaving us for the equivalent of a tall blonde with perky boobs and, oh right, $254 million. Goodbye St. Louis, hello sunny and warm LA. As much as I’m relieved that he didn’t leave us for the Chicago Cubs, maybe it would hurt less if he were leaving us for someone hideously ugly. Like Siberia. Yes I know there isn’t a baseball team in Siberia, THAT ISN’T THE POINT, OKAY?!

It just really hurts, you know? To think you know someone and to find out that they aren’t who you thought they were…this is going to take some time to get over. I thought that we would be together forever, building our life and creating memories and winning more World Series together. I thought that one day we’d build him a statue to stand near the one we built for Stan the Man Musial. And now for it all to just end? WE LOVED HIM and now we know that he just didn’t love us the same way. He’s just like the rest of them, chasing money.

Really, I should have seen the signs, but I couldn’t allow myself to ever imagine that our relationship would end. When discussion of our relationship was put on hold in the spring, that’s when I should have known. Now I’m learning that he didn’t treat us with as much respect as we wanted and deserved. Maybe he’s not as deserving as the pedestal where we as Cardinals Nation placed him, but my heart doesn’t understand this yet.

So for today, I want to wallow in my own misery of Albert Pujols leaving us. Please excuse me while I put on some PJs, grab a pint of Ben & Jerry’s, and listen to Pearl Jam’s Black on repeat.

“I know someday you’ll have a beautiful life,
I know you’ll be a sun in somebody else’s sky, but why
Why, why can’t it be, can’t it be mine”

Why? Only 254 million reasons why.

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The best babysitter award that I really didn’t want to hand out

Written on December 5, 2011 by Jennifer in Little Monkeys

So, if you read my last post, you may have learned that I’m a bit…neurotic. Maybe I tend to overthink things a bit. I just…I, well, I wish that maybe I would have written that post, pressed “Save Draft,” then re-read it later and rolled my eyes at myself. It’s not that I am not worried about over indulging my children on Christmas, I AM, but I think that perhaps I was a bit melodramatic about it and blaming poor ol’ Santa. I think what it’s really all about is that my house is a mess and frankly, I’m already tired thinking about putting away all their new toys.

Thanks for your supportive comments. And by supportive comments I mean, I could hear you sighing and shaking your head at me, but then gently smiling and telling me what I needed to hear. You guys, we would so totally be friends in real life.

Okay, so let’s move on and pretend that I’m a totally normal, well adjusted human being that doesn’t project her feelings on unsuspecting bearded men wearing red suits!

Saturday night was my husband’s annual work Christmas party. Since our babysitter was totally SELFISH and decided to go away to college (RUDE!), I had to find someone new to stay with Carson and Ella.

Let me back up a bit and tell you that both of my children had been sick, Carson especially so, but on Saturday they both seemed FINE. Perfectly fine! Healthy, even. Carson seemed to be over his “puke in bed every night” illness, so I wasn’t worried about leaving him with a babysitter. OH THE FORESHADOWING.

When the new babysitter arrived, Tate asked her about what she was studying in school. Turns out that our new babysitter is training to be a paramedic, which fortunately (or perhaps unfortunately) came in quite handy while she was on duty.

It was the pile of Carson’s sheets, his PJs, and Lou Bear by the laundry room that we found as soon as we got home that was the first clue.

I expected to find pure chaos when I found the babysitter and Carson. If I had ever had to deal with puke as a babysitter, I would have freaked the freak out! The babysitter, looking calm yet concerned, was just toweling off a freshly bathed and very pale Carson when I found them. Apparently my poor little guy had puked in his bed and had some other “issues” of the bottom. Super Paramedic Babysitter had already cleaned him AND his room up.

I apologized profusely to her for having left her with a sick kid and having to deal with vomit, etc. She seemed completely unfazed. “It’s just body fluids,” she said. “And it easier to deal with when it’s from a cute kid.”

“Just body fluids” that don’t belong to your own child, cute or not, are still BODY FLUIDS of the disgusting kind.

I felt like I should pay her double, no quadruple, and then offer to send her on an all expense paid trip to Jamaica or something.

And on top of all that, she’d cleaned up the kitchen after dinner. She wins at babysitting.

I’m not sure if I can ever call her again to babysit after all this. I mean, can I?

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I’m not so sure about Santa

Written on November 30, 2011 by Jennifer in Little Monkeys, Quirky Me, Religimcal Thoughts

I grew up believing in Santa Claus. Hook, line, and sinker, I believed in all of it. From the elves and the North Pole, the milk and cookies left out on Christmas Eve, to the note he left for me to find in the morning, and of course all of the presents, he was THE single biggest part of Christmas for me. The part about it being Jesus’ birthday was kind of an afterthought.

Then I grew older and learned the truth. No, he didn’t exist, but I still cherished the magical feeling the belief in Santa brought to all those Christmases. I can’t imagine my childhood without Santa! It’s a tradition I never considered NOT carrying on with my kids.

I’ll admit that I’m not really feeling Christmas this year. Santa and all his cohorts with their gifts are making me feel overwhelmed. I look around my children’s playroom (and their bedrooms, and my living room, and under the couches, and in closets, and under my feet) and can see clearly that they have too much STUFF. They’re completely spoiled.

They have no idea what it is to want for anything, let alone that other people struggle to have even the most basic of their needs met. My kids will not only wake up in a warm bed Christmas morning and have a filling breakfast while wearing brand new PJs, they’ll also have a ridiculous number of gifts to open from Tate and I, from grandparents, aunts and uncles, and because he’s a part of our tradition, there will be gifts from Santa. We are so incredibly blessed that this is the case, that we can provide their basic needs and much, MUCH more. But the part of this that isn’t sitting well with me is that they EXPECT these gifts and in their innocent, age-appropriate way, they feel ENTITLED to these gifts.

Santa really is just a metaphor for “On Christmas, we get TOO MANY PRESENTS,” to the extent that Christmas seems like it’s just about gifts and that’s it. And WE DID THIS, my husband and I. We are the ones who have allowed Christmas to get out of control and haven’t showed them that Christmas is about giving and the celebration of Jesus’ birth. I get that Carson and Ella are just little kids and we have just wanted to fill them with magic and wonder, but I feel we’ve done a huge disservice to them by showering them with more STUFF and by perpetuating the myth of Santa. Last year in an effort to put a limit on MORE! STUFF!, my husband and I decided that Santa would only be bringing one gift, he and I would give them two more for a total of three. The thought process behind this idea was that Jesus got three gifts, so that’s what they would get, too.

But that doesn’t include the truckloads of gifts that will arrive from extended family. Which? I don’t want to deprive our family from the joy of giving either.

Then there’s this whole idea of Santa. I’m mean, I simply can’t imagine Christmas without Santa, but I also feel like the whole idea of Santa is like an out of control car that we can’t jump off of. It’s too late now to take Santa out of Christmas, and really, that’s not what I want at all. In my heart, though, I feel really conflicted. I’m trying to get my children to love and believe in Jesus, but here in a few years they’ll find out that Santa isn’t real, but oh, that other guy, Jesus? The one you can’t see either? Well, HE is real. Yes, I know I lied about Santa, but I’m not lying about Jesus. You should just trust me on this. Really??

I’m struggling with how to make Christmas magical for my children without giving up Santa, but also stressing the Jesus part. (Or even if I were not Christian, I’d still want it to be more than just about STUFF, you know?) What does the middle ground look like where Santa visits and Jesus is front and center and the kids get a few gifts and they APPRECIATE each one? How do we jump off the runaway car?

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Back when

Written on November 28, 2011 by Jennifer in blogging, Pictures, Quirky Me

I never kept a diary, except maybe a few angsty lines as a middle schooler who’d just made out with a boy for the first time. Five years ago this month, I opened up a Blogger account and began to write the stories of my life. My first post, since deleted, was about my 20 week ultrasound to find out the sex of the baby I was carrying, who is now a sassy four year old sister to a six year old brother.

Tentatively I started to speak, out loud for the first time, about motherhood and it’s challenges. I know now that there’s a fine balance between saying what needs to be said and saying too much, though I’m still learning to walk that tightrope.

My blog was my very own personal space, here’s what I said about it in February 2007,

“Nobody is leaving their dirty socks on my blog. Nobody is pointing and grunting at my blog and demanding a bite of it. My blog doesn’t have a leaky…diaper. There is NO LAUNDRY or dog hair in my blog. My blog has never told me ‘no’. “

I still treasure and feel very protective of this space, five years later. It is still one place that is mine, all 845 posts.

When this blog began:

1. I lived in Alabama.

2. I’d never heard of Facebook because it was only for those young, whippersnapper college kids, but I did have a Myspace account, complete with flashy graphics and autoplay music.

3. I looked sort of like this, just less pregnant:

4. This blog was a secret.

5. I felt very lonely and isolated.

6. I’d gained more than just pregnancy weight.

7. I cussed like a sailor.

8. I never exercised because I thought I didn’t have time. (I really didn’t have time, though.)

9. I was in a playgroup, which is indeed why this blog got the name I gave it.

10. I’d never heard of Google Reader, spent my days commenting on at least twenty blogs a day, and felt a real sense of community online.

11. I didn’t have a paying job.

Since this blog began:

1. I’ve moved twice (to Indiana, then to Tennessee) and lived in five different houses and/or apartments.

2. I’ve started accounts on Facebook, Twitter, and about 32 million other sites that in hopes of making my blog super popular. (Technorati, BlogLuxe, TopBlogSites, Cre8buzz, Plurk, NING groups, Alltop, StumbleUpon…)

3. I look sort of look like this, except most of the time I’m less stylish and my children are squalling:

4. This blog isn’t a secret. I still wish it was a secret some days.

5. I don’t feel lonely or isolated anymore. Well, usually. We all feel lonely sometimes, right? My life is pretty great and I feel incredibly blessed. Motherhood isn’t easy, but the kids are older now and we’re not bound by a nap schedule and they don’t completely drain me of life every single minute of the day.

6. I gained even more weight then lost most of it.

7. I don’t cuss like a sailor on the blog and I try not to cuss now except when the situation warrants it. There are many situations that warrant a good swear word, though.

8. I ran a 10K on Thanksgiving day in 1:01. I am getting ready to start training to run a half marathon. I’m making the time even though I don’t really have time to do the training.

9. I’m not in a playgroup, but yet! The blog name remains the same. It’s too late to change it now.

10. I adore my Google Reader, though I’m ticked they took away the Share function. I rarely comment on blogs anymore, but I want to do better because I miss that community feeling. I mean, the community is there, but I feel like I’m on the outskirts looking in.

11. I have jobs! Real jobs! And it’s all because five years ago this month, I opened a Blogger account and started writing.

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