Comments on: Let’s Play a Game! Incredibly Helpful or Nagging and Maniacal?

By: Dawn @ Coming to a Nursery Near You

Dawn @ Coming to a Nursery Near You — Sat, 17 Nov 2007 13:03:00 +0000

lol Ok, I may have to go with the Queen on this too. TOO much “suggestion” leads to that certain husband feeling rather… ummmmmimmmmasculated lol

But still - I KNOW exactly what you mean in this purely hypothetical situation.

By: Julie @ the calm before the stork

Julie @ the calm before the stork — Sat, 17 Nov 2007 02:52:00 +0000

I loooooo-ho-ho-oooove this list.

All the commenters have covered the angles. I have no experience yet so the fact that my first thought was -- Brilliant, give him the list! -- probably shows my status.

I like the idea of letting him work it out himself, especially if you install a few nanny-cams for posterity. Kidding.

That one who said he'll figure out something you never thought of is probably right.

Short comment longer... I once gave a friend some relationship advice, long before I'd had a relationship longer than a few months (!!! -- that's how advice is sometimes). I told her to stop giving her husband instructions or advice, unless asked, for one week.

During that same week, she had to also repeat this mantra to herself: (name of husband) is beautiful (noh) is perfect.

If she had problems with either task, she was to make a list of her fears (i.e.: what he needed to be told, why he wasn't perfect) and call me to read it.

Within a few days, the couple was having sex again -- four days in a row -- (a rarity post baby-number-two), he'd taken out the garbage without nagging, and he'd made a plan for his job search (you can imagine how she'd been trying to "help" with that).

Now that I have my own husband to instruct and nag, I find it hard to remember and follow this little solution I gave her, but I like to remember how happy it made them, and share it with others from time to time...

By: VDog

VDog — Thu, 15 Nov 2007 04:18:00 +0000

Men don’t like to be “helped.”

They just like to complain to you later about (WAAAHHHHH) how *dificult* it was to (WAHHHHH) take care of the kids while you were gone.

I loved your list.

By: Amy Barry

Amy Barry — Wed, 14 Nov 2007 19:21:00 +0000

Mine would have come back at me with an equal number of helpful hints about the things he’s figured out work or don’t. He would listen to those hints only *after* experiencing them for himself. As in ‘don’t fix it until *after* it’s broke’. So yours might have a greater appreciation of the list *after* trying it his way for a day (heehee!)

By: winslow1204

winslow1204 — Wed, 14 Nov 2007 17:57:00 +0000

I love your list! That is something I would do.. only my hubby would laugh at me for doing it:)

By: Sandy

Sandy — Wed, 14 Nov 2007 17:03:00 +0000

Very Helpful BUT…you have to understand that, like children, Men have to learn the hard way. You can write it down and stress how this will keep down the workload/messload, but in the end they have to find out for themselves. And when they complain that their way didn’t work to well (i.e. the spot on the couch, banana everywhere, etc). , just smile and say that there was, in fact, a reason for your madness when you gave him the list.

By: nell

nell — Wed, 14 Nov 2007 14:32:00 +0000

See, I think this would be very helpful, if I was a babysitter, for example, these are thing I’d like to know. But this morning after I asked Steve if he’d packed Til’s snack, and packed her a spoon for lunch, and he was giving me that look, I told him about this post and he just laughed and laughed…

By: SabrinaT

SabrinaT — Wed, 14 Nov 2007 11:02:00 +0000

I make a list. Write everything down. I would leave the bowls and spoons needed out on the counter. All 3 of the boys clothes are laid out. Along with the shoes for the day. I have an emergency bag packed, with first aid kit. Just in case. I go way overboard and I know it. Popeye knows and accepts my crazyness. SO, no I think you are doing what any loving wife and mother would do….

By: Christina

Christina — Wed, 14 Nov 2007 03:42:00 +0000

I knew I liked you for a reason - you’re just like me!

Here’s the honest truth: you can’t win. If you don’t make the list, he’ll do things in the less-efficient way, causing more work for later. If you do make the list, he’ll resent it and try to prove you wrong by doing things differently, causing more work for later.

Just be prepared for a mess to clean up when you get home.

By: Mrs. Fussy Fussypants

Mrs. Fussy Fussypants — Wed, 14 Nov 2007 03:12:00 +0000

Bwa-ha-ha-ha! That was me about 2 or 3 kids ago. Brilliant.

Seriously,hilarious.

You know I’m preggers with the
5th boy,right?WhenHubs “babysits” it is something out of ‘Animal House’. If I come home and the house is still in reasonably good shape, I can’t complain.
I just put extra lotion on the babies bottom and hope he checks often.
I’m just happy to get a break!