You Can Call Me Al

Most Darling Internetz,

Those of you with un-nickname-able names are lucky. With a name like Jennifer, I have a plethora of nicknames of which to choose. Perhaps “plethora” is a bit of an exaggeration, but there are at least two nicknames that I’ve been called.

When I was a baby, I was called Jennifer. Sometime during my childhood, Jennifer was reduced to Jenny. Most everyone I know from my childhood, all the way up through college and a few years beyond knows me as Jenny.

My parents call me Jenny. My husband calls me Jenny.

A few years ago, I decided that I’d prefer to be called Jennifer. This wasn’t a decision that I announced like, “hey people who’ve called me Jenny for over 20 years! Yes, you! Call me Jennifer now, mkay?” Nothing like that, I just started introducing myself to new people as Jennifer. Whenever Tate introduces me to new people, he does so as Jenny. This has caused some hard to explain moments.

At Carson’s recent birthday party, my people-who-call-me-Jennifer friends were brought together with my people-who-call-me-Jenny friends. Each was surprised to hear me called by the other name. “But I thought you hated Jenny?” (I do kinda.) “I didn’t know you preferred to be called Jennifer?” (Yep) While I’d prefer to just go by Jennifer, it would be odd to hear my childhood friends or my parents to start calling me Jennifer at this point. This seems to make people feel weird, though, when they find out about my double name possibilities.

To further complicate manners, there are people who call me Jen. The funny thing about this is if complete strangers automatically ASSume they can just shorten my name and call me Jen, it irritates me to no end. I don’t feel this way if a friend up and decides to call me Jen, even if they’ve never asked.

A final thought on names…since Ella has become a thumb sucker, can I keep the “Binky Bitch” moniker? Is that breaking some sort of sacred Internet rule if I’m continued to be called by a name that no longer accurately describes me?

Your (hot as hell) friend,
Jen
Jenny
Jennifer
Binky Bitch

67 Responses to You Can Call Me Al
  1. Amy
    November 17, 2007 | 3:30 am

    I love all your names, Jen, Jenny, and Jennifer. My sister is Jennifer (mostly Jenny, once in a while Jen) and I always wished my parents had named her Amy and me Jennifer.
    When she was born (she’s younger) I couldn’t say Jennifer. I called her Feffer. Heh, good thing that didn’t stick huh?

  2. T.
    November 17, 2007 | 3:38 am

    I understand – I grew up as a Teri Lynn. When I went to University I became Teri (b/c I liked it better). My family calls me Teri Lynn, people from my home town call me Teri Lynn and most other people call me Teri. However, my husband’s family calls me Theresa (our wedding invite came out as that – they think that’s what I like).

    So Jenny I get it.

  3. Christina
    November 17, 2007 | 3:39 am

    Aw hell, I just realized I called you Jen when I e-mailed you last time. Sorry ’bout that.

    I don’t like my name shortened at all. My immediate family gets away with calling me Chris, because they always have, but I don’t even let my husband call me that. (He tried once at a family gathering, since everyone else was calling me that. He quickly learned that was NOT OK.)

    And anyone who calls me Chrissy gets hurt.

  4. d e v a n
    November 17, 2007 | 3:40 am

    Ah, I can see how that would be confusing…
    I mostly just get called devan, because that is a hard name to shorten.
    However, my parents call me Dev a lot, which I like but cannot – even after 10 years! – get my husband to call me.

  5. Veggie Mama
    November 17, 2007 | 3:43 am

    I prefer to go by Mandie, even though my step dad and his family all call me Amanda (irritated me to no end as a child).

    However, I’ve developed kind of a “professional” moniker and a “casual” one. Friends call me Mandie. Co-workers (when I work) call me Amanda. It just sounds better on the Resume.

    Just don’t call me Mindy. And try to spell Mandie right, Mmmkay? :D

  6. Trenches of Mommyhood
    November 17, 2007 | 3:44 am

    I’m jealous of (all) your nicknames. Sarah is hard to shorten!

  7. tommie
    November 17, 2007 | 3:47 am

    I have a “Jenny” SIL, I wonder if she really likes to be called that now!

    I have a thumbsucker, too…But you can be called the BB if you want to!

  8. Bananas
    November 17, 2007 | 4:26 am

    oh how I can go ON about my name. I WISH it was Jennifer. My parents chose to christen me with Jenny, which leaves me perpetually nick-named. Believe me, I would much prefer Jennifer… more adult, more sophisticated… but it shall not be so.

  9. desperate housewife
    November 17, 2007 | 4:30 am

    I have both a sister and a sister-in-law named Jennifer. One hates Jenny, and has been Jenn or Jennifer all her life. The other went by Jeni until she was twenty-five, when she announced to one and all that it was now “Jen” and acted put out whenever we forgot. She has now settled on “Jennifer.” Whatevah!
    That said, I can totally understand how annoying it would be to have a name that complete strangers can take liberties with.

  10. Smiling Mom
    November 17, 2007 | 4:35 am

    Suck it.-instead of Binkie Bitch. :-)

    My brother had so many Jennifers in his class that they were named; JenA, JennS etc. all through their elementary years.

  11. Nora Bee
    November 17, 2007 | 4:43 am

    Hello! I sometimes wish I had a good nickname, never really had one in my life. What can you do with Nora? But there’s always something. I did get called Laura until I was about 13 by most people at school because, like, whoever heard of a name like Nora?

  12. Bethany
    November 17, 2007 | 4:49 am

    I can totally relate to the whole “people shortening your name and ASSuming it’s OK” I get Beth A.L.O.T. And I hate it. Like HATE IT. But I say don’t do away w/ Binky Bitch…. I like it! (that totally counts for something, right?) LOL

  13. Phoenix
    November 17, 2007 | 6:02 am

    Um yes you can keep your bloggy name. Dude, seriously I stole mine form my car. Anyway, I have the same problem as you. Well with my real name. I have a few nicknames, but only one I like. The other, I want to hit people who say it. Unfortunetly, I have one friend who uses it and I don’t mind it, but only out of her mouth. And only, cause I’ve known her forever.

    I think it’s a universal problem, really. My mom was so sure she was giving me something that wouldn’t end up in a nickname. She has spent the last 20 years trying to get people to call her Tricia, instead of Patty, which she went by as kid and hated even then.

    I’ll tell you what, I’ll always call you Jennifer or Binky Bitch, okay?

  14. tulipmom
    November 17, 2007 | 6:07 am

    Over the years my family and close friends have called me Nat, a nickname I’ve always liked. I’m less enthralled when people who don’t know me that well ASSume they can shorten my name to Nat. You’ve got to EARN that, people!!

    I do have a few relatives who’ve called me “Nats” ever since I was a little girl, and I never liked that. Too buggy.

    D. calls me Nat. He only uses Natalie when he’s really annoyed.

  15. Mrs. Flinger
    November 17, 2007 | 7:05 am

    Is it wrong that I want family to call me Missus Flinger? When they call me Les? Leslie? Ahsley? Yea. That one? The grandmother who’s known me since I was 14. Never gets the name right.

    I never EVER assume a nickname until I’m replied to with it or told it. “Hey, Leslie, it’s Jen.” Then I know. Otherwise, always assume it’s the name you’re given. “Jennifer, Hot-Ass-Binky-Bitch.” It’s all good.

  16. Veronica
    November 17, 2007 | 7:42 am

    My name gets shortened to so many different things!

    Von, Vonnie, Ron, Ronni etc.

    I agree, I only like my close friends to call me Ronni.

    If Nathan or Mum call me Veronica, I know I am in trouble :)

  17. Henny Penny
    November 17, 2007 | 9:28 am

    I’ve been thru the whole Jenny, Jen, Jennifer thang until I could stand it no longer. In high school I roomed with another Jennifer. In college I lived with 3 Jennifers. In law school I could sit at an entire lunch table populated by Jennifers. So I dropped my first name and only use it when I have to. My parents, grandparents, aunts and uncles still call me Jenny – but everyone else uses my highly unusual middle name.

  18. Heather, Queen of Shake-Shake
    November 17, 2007 | 11:03 am

    Give up Binky Bitch?

    What kind of smack talk is THAT?

    Hey, I don’t care if Ella is a thumb sucker now, (which is the most adorable thing EVAH. Well, short of my own kids. But my heart melts every time I see her doing it!) you earned that title Binky Bitch.

    Come on, Presidents are still called Mr. President out of respect, even after their term is up.

    I say keep it just the way Mr. President keeps it…you damn sure earned my respect going through all of that!

  19. Cathy
    November 17, 2007 | 12:10 pm

    My nephew, Ethan, started kindergarten this year and is learning about names and nicknames. Since he didn’t have a nickname going into this he decided his nickname would be Nick. We’ve tried to convince him to let us call him “E”, but he insists on Nick. Go figure.
    I also have the problem of some people calling me Catherine and others Cathy…and my best friend calls me Bob.
    My boys? Quinn can’t be shortened, so maybe one day he’ll decide I should call him Nick. And Liam is already short for William. No chance in hell I’ll call him Billy, someone tried once and heard a mouthful from me. If he decides one day to be Will instead of Liam I could live with that.
    My other nephew James has always been called James and nothing else. When he was 5 (11 years ago!) my sister and I took him to see Santa.
    Santa: What’s your name?
    James: James.
    Santa: Okay Jimmy, what would you like for Christmas?
    James: No. My name is James. (as he climbed off Santa’s lap)
    Nice one Santa.

  20. AndreAnna
    November 17, 2007 | 12:24 pm

    With a name like AndreAnna, there’s not much to shorten it to that doesn’t make me sound like a large dead wrestler. So, people just suck it up and say all four syllables. Or, I get AA a lot in emails and such, which I’ve even started using. Just easier!

  21. AndreAnna
    November 17, 2007 | 12:27 pm

    OH, my daugher is Charlotte, and her father and I call her Charlotte, but his side of the family calls her “Charlie girl” and my side calls her “Bucket” which derived from Charlie Bucket from Willy Wonka.

    My nephew is Colin and I used to call him “Monkeydoodles” when he was a baby and now that he’s four, it was shortened to Doodles, but he prefers if I call him “Dude”

    I guess we have a weird family, but that is nothing new.

  22. beta mom
    November 17, 2007 | 12:35 pm

    I agree with Heather – keep Binky Bitch! If we have to keep these freakin’ stretch marks all of our lives, then we should at least be able to keep the awesome nicknames as well.

  23. electronic motor scooters
    November 17, 2007 | 12:37 pm

    gud article..made interesting reading.!!

  24. kara
    November 17, 2007 | 1:01 pm

    you crack me up.

    I’m happy as long as people call me Kara instead of Kari. yes it happens ALL THE TIME. Especially when dh introduces me.

  25. nell
    November 17, 2007 | 1:26 pm

    I get Nellie sometimes from really rude people who somehow have no idea that it’s just wrong. Also people often call me Neil if they’re reading my name, it even happened as I crossed the stage at my college graduation. Good times.

  26. nell
    November 17, 2007 | 1:27 pm

    Oh, and I think you can be the Binky Bitch for as long as you feel you want to – it’s like your Native American name, bestowed upon you during a particular time in your life. I see no need to get rid of it.

  27. Annie
    November 17, 2007 | 1:28 pm

    This made me laugh – because I can so relate to it!

    My baby shower was the first time that my US friends and Irish friends here were together – one bunch call me Annie the other bunch call me by my given name ‘Anne-Louise’ – it was weird for both groups – but I just left them to get over it lol! When I meet someone new, I always introduce myself as Anne-Louise – but hubs and family always call me Annie – so that’s why that name has ‘got out’ over here. I’ve grown up with both names, and respond to both of them equally. Of course some days I hear nothing but ‘MOM MEH’

  28. the dragonfly
    November 17, 2007 | 1:44 pm

    My name has no nicknames, and I always hated that. *sigh*

    My son’s name has two nicknames associated with it; one very common and the other (the one we call him) rather rare. I wonder what will happen when he goes to school?

  29. Emily R
    November 17, 2007 | 1:47 pm

    That drives me up a wall — if you don’t know someone well, you have no business shortening her name.

    I saw on your sidebar that you are the nation’s foremost expert on children pooping in bodies of water. That may only be because I am temporarily relocated to London, where I am the foremost expert on said activity…

    Emily (not Em)

  30. Sandy-"Worm"
    November 17, 2007 | 2:14 pm

    It could be worse. My nickname is Sandy…so it isn’t bad…BUT…my family always called me worm and still do. My grandfather used to call me a wiggle worm when I was a baby and the “worm” part stuck. To this day if I see family that I haven’t seen in a while (and occasionally family I do see often) they will call me Worm. At least all of yours (for the most part) are a part of your name.

    :-)

  31. slouching mom
    November 17, 2007 | 2:36 pm

    Y’know, I like the name Jennifer precisely because it can be so many things. My name? Sarah? No options at all.

    (I know what you mean about the childhood friends vs. recent friends dichotomy — my brother’s name is Dan, but my mother and I still call him Daniel. And we are the only ones who are allowed to do so, LOL!)

  32. Jackie
    November 17, 2007 | 3:16 pm

    I have a friend who decided after college that she wanted to be called Rebecca. It’s hard because I’d always know her as Becky.

    I have another friend, Michelle, who’s whole family calls her Shelly. When I get an e-mail from her her contact name is Shelly – I always have to think about who the hell that is before I delete it as spam.

    I like Binky Bitch – I definitely think you should keep it.

  33. Jean
    November 17, 2007 | 3:23 pm

    I thought I was the only with this issue. All my life up until I met my husband I was Jeanie. C. liked Jean better and it was more adult. So it’s really weird talking to old friends of mine cause they still know me as Jeanie. When Im replying to their e-mail, I almost have to force my self to sign it with the added ie. It’s almost like I have a double life. It was really awkward at my high school reunion. Crazy how many of us have this issue.

  34. Bren
    November 17, 2007 | 3:33 pm

    My hubby has the same issue. His name is David and people like to call him Dave. He hates it!

  35. janet
    November 17, 2007 | 3:34 pm

    i cop to being one of the “jen” commenters. i apologize humbly. but i read about 6 blogs written by jen, jennifer, jenn … i get cornfuzzled sometimes.

    my boys were all have names that can be shortened but it was never my intention to do so. they, on the other hand, all decided before the age of 10 to shorten them and won’t answer to anything else.

    my daughter’s name IS a nickname. suck it up, kid. :-)

  36. Sexy Housewife
    November 17, 2007 | 4:42 pm

    My parents were anti-nickname and I am anti-nickname. You can’t be afraid to to tell people what you prefer to be called. A lady I know recently decided to go by her given name rather than a nickname. She said my mother gave me my name for a reason and that’s wo I should be.

    As far as your blog name, that’s the beauty of the internet…you can be whoever you want to be. I plan on being Sexy Housewife even after I go back to work, have no kids at home, and turn ugly.

  37. OHmommy
    November 17, 2007 | 5:29 pm

    I am not alone!

    Sometime during grade school my name was shortened to Paula. YUCK! Can you imagine? I started college as a Pauline. At my wedding my Paula friends and my Pauline friends were shocked.

    I like to change names. I

    changed my daughter’s name when she was about 3 months old.

  38. mrs. mustard
    November 17, 2007 | 6:49 pm

    Keep the Binky Bitch!
    And as for nicknames, I wish I could relate, but when your name is Sarah, there isn’t much room for name-games.
    Although I have had Sarah-Beara (which is just odd, to me).

  39. AnGlOpHiLe FoOtBaLl FaNaTiC
    November 17, 2007 | 7:05 pm

    You must keep Binky Bitch. I am sorry if I’ve called you Jen & it upset you.

  40. Milk Maid
    November 17, 2007 | 7:14 pm

    I always refer to you as “Jennifer the Binky Bitch” in conversation. And, yes I do talk about you and how funny you are- it’s all a good thing. I titally understand the name game though. I used to have a really boring normal name and I changed it back to what it was before I was adopted. That still confuses the poo out of people. I forget who I am half the time– just call me the milk maid.

  41. Christy
    November 17, 2007 | 9:50 pm

    Christy to friends, Chris to family. I so get ya!

  42. MH
    November 17, 2007 | 9:56 pm

    I do have to admit, I think of you as Jenny. But, since your first e-mail to me said, “I go by Jennifer now,” I try to remember that!

  43. mamaDB
    November 18, 2007 | 12:07 am

    Yes, can totally relate. I’m a Danielle. Have always prefered Danielle. In 5th grade I had a substitute teacher that was older than dirt. She was mispronouncing names left and right and I dreaded when she arrived to me and called me “Darfnell”. That stuck through middle school. High School they tried to label me “Danny” but I didn’t allow it. My Dad still calls me Dan. I’m okay with him doing it. But that’s it.

  44. Nesting Momma
    November 18, 2007 | 12:20 am

    I am a Donna and never ever had a nick name….Donna bona at times huh…gave myself Nesting Momma but Donna is the real deal. Bye for now Jennifer the Binky Bitch….

  45. Suburban Oblivion
    November 18, 2007 | 12:43 am

    I never thought about it, but I think I call you Jen on your answering machine!

  46. Pregnantly Plump
    November 18, 2007 | 1:44 am

    I understand the whole nickname thing. My name is Meredith. Close friends and family can call me Mere, but that has to be earned. People who call me Mary get a glare. In 4th grade I had a teacher who called me “Marry-it” the whole year. In 7th grade I was Mereducky for a while (I can’t remember how that came about.) And in college, my sorority sisters called me “Pottymouth.” I was fine when they called me that in our house, but got embarrassed when they yelled it out while I was walking across the quad.

  47. Shelly Overlook
    November 18, 2007 | 2:13 am

    How about if I just call you Hottie and call it good?

    My name is Shelly, not derived from Michelle, just plain Shelly. I had a third grade teacher who tried to explain to me that Shelly was a nickname, that my real name was Michelle. Bitch. She never did believe me.

  48. Treadmillista
    November 18, 2007 | 2:36 am

    My DH has a similar problem, although as he’s aged it has become less pronounced. His college and younger friends call him by his nickname, everyone else calls him his actual name. It is weird when the two worlds meet.

    Even better is one of his cousin’s who has just one name, but it is pronounced differently by different factions in her life. It was weird at her wedding! Carrie the normal way, and then Car-ie.

  49. Karly
    November 18, 2007 | 4:21 am

    KEEP BINKY BITCH! I love that nickname.

    And take it from me, having an un-nickname-able name sucks. My name is Karly. You can not shorten that. YOU JUST CAN’T. And yet people do. People try call me Kar or Karl and I want to hit them. Seriously? Kar? Karl? WTF?

  50. Swistle
    November 18, 2007 | 4:40 am

    I think you can change it if you want to, Al.