Guess who has Internet access and is gloriously happy about it!?!?! I’ll give you three guesses, but the first two don’t count….
That’s right, genius! ME!
(And it’s not even stolen, which makes me a little sad because that would have been a far more exciting story to tell.)
Anyway.
I would like to take this time to give myself a swift kick in the arse since I packed away my camera at the bottom of a tote and couldn’t take pictures of a few of the things I saw on the drive, because BOY OH BOY did they make me chuckle. Sadly, this would have been a much better post with pictures. It’s the kind of thing that it’s funny if you’re there, but maybe not so much when you are just reading about it.
Anyway.
There was a sign along I-65 in Alabama that said, and I’m NOT EVEN LYING, “Go to church or the devil will get you.” This very helpful message was accompanied by the picture of the devil that looked suspiciously like the devil from those cans of icky deviled ham. Um? Can you say COPYRIGHT INFRINGEMENT!? I say that copyright infringement yields a far worse fate than not going to church. I suspect Jesus would agree with me.
Another sign that I saw on I-65, but this time in Kentucky, and I’m still NOT LYING said, “Jim Bob’s B00bie Bonanza next exit.” Okay, it didn’t actually say “Bonanza,” but I can’t recall exactly what it did say. That’s not even the point, though. The word “b00bie” was on a billboard and that’s some funny stuff right there. I was going to stop the car and have Tate take a picture of me and the kids in front of Jim Bob’s B00bie Bonanza because that would have been KLASSY.
Speaking of adult entertainment, there sure is a plethora of A*DULT BOOKSTORES! and A*DULT VIDEOS! too choose from along this nation’s interstate system. In one particularly thick patch of A*DULT ENTERTAINMENT offerings I saw a sign on the left-hand side of the road that said, “Turn here for all your A*DULT ENTERTAINMENT needs!” On the other side of the road, just opposite this sign was a message warning of eternal damnation, “You pay for porn in HELL.”
Wooooooooooow. That’s quite a deterrent.
See how this post would have been much better with pictures?? Meh. Sorry.
Exciting update….here’s a link to another blog that posted a picture of the church/devil sign!! (Thank you Google. I love you.)
Mama DB
January 27, 2008 at 3:57 pm
Your header is pretty awesome!
The devil sign is scary. I’m glad you guys made it okay though. I am disappointed that you didn’t at least stop at the b00bie bonanza. tut. tut.
Mama DB’s last blog post..Ray of Sunshine
Loralee
January 27, 2008 at 4:12 pm
Thank goodness my b00bies and I will know where to go when I go road triping through Alabama AND know the state of our immortal soul after we get there!!
You are a regular Public Service Announcement.
Loralee’s last blog post..Sideblog:Best Bra Buy
FENICLE
January 27, 2008 at 4:22 pm
Welcome to the Hoosier state. I love the banner! I’m way down there on the map of Indiana in the lower left hand corner in Evansville….a little too close to the Kentucky border.
FENICLE’s last blog post..Hello, You’ve Reached The Morris’s
Carrie
January 27, 2008 at 4:29 pm
HAHAHAHA that is hilarious!! Scary… but hilarious. I can’t believe they’d put it up… but as you said, you were driving through the Bible Belt… Oh my.
kind of reminds me of the time my family and I stayed in the same hotel as the Jehovahs Witnesses convention.
Carrie’s last blog post..When shopping in New York, always wear nice underwear
Swistle
January 27, 2008 at 4:32 pm
Ha ha! Or the devil will get you! And bring you to hell where you can pay for your porn! Somehow I never pictured “The Battle Between Good and Evil” taking place on billboards.
Swistle’s last blog post..Making Baby Food: Encore!
Devilish Southern Belle
January 27, 2008 at 4:32 pm
You must have driven through Nashville; I hear that city has the largest ‘adult’ store in the country.
So….are you there yet?
Devilish Southern Belle’s last blog post..How important, exactly,
Sandy
January 27, 2008 at 4:55 pm
haha That’s funny. HEY that reminds me of a pic DH and his cousin took while on a trip to Ohio…it said:
PLAYGROUND –
NUDE GIRLS GIRLS GIRLS –
Free food – Free Pop –
XXX Video 24hrs 7 days
I actually have a picture of it..I posted it on my page just fer you. HAHA
Sandy’s last blog post..Crazy Road Signs
Jean
January 27, 2008 at 6:23 pm
Thats classy if I do say so myself. Littering the highways with such bible thumping garbage. I’m surprised you didn’t see 300 foot high crosses along the way, or maybe that’s an Okie thing.
phyllis
January 27, 2008 at 6:45 pm
lol…love your new banner. welcome to the midwest, darlin’!
phyllis’s last blog post..aren’t you excited? and five places I’ve Been This Week
Shelly
Twitter: shelly_overlook
January 27, 2008 at 7:20 pm
Love the new look! So glad you’re there and you made it, barely unscathed it sounds like. What an educational journey your children have had through our country! How are the new digs?
Shelly’s last blog post..Ring Ring
Sarah @ Ordinary Days
January 27, 2008 at 7:26 pm
Is it sad that when you typed KLASSY I immediately thought of the Classy Chassy, one of Indy’s very own fine dancing establishments?
Anyway…Welcome to Indy!! Love the new header.
Sarah @ Ordinary Days’s last blog post..Hot Mama Revolution: Make-Up Review and Drawing
Lisa
January 27, 2008 at 7:45 pm
So funny! On our recent trip to NY we also saw a sign for Big Jim’s Boobie Bungalow on I-65 out of Alabama! Big Jim sure has his hands full- uh, no pun intended!
Lisa’s last blog post..Bag Lady
Dawn
January 27, 2008 at 7:47 pm
“Hoos-yer mommy” beautiful.
Dawn’s last blog post..Weekly Winners
MammaLoves
January 27, 2008 at 7:55 pm
It’s going to take me a while to think of you living in IN.
PS–Just because you moved doesn’t mean you don’t have to go to BlogHer.
I sooooo want to meet you.
MammaLoves’s last blog post..And He Didn’t Even Need the Liquid Kevlar
Jenni
January 27, 2008 at 7:58 pm
I’m sorry, you’re just going to have to turn around and go back for pictures. Really.
Jenni’s last blog post..Scrolling Saturday- Modest New Mom, Oxymoron?
Anglophile Football Fanatic
January 27, 2008 at 8:18 pm
Yay for being back!! Woo hoo! And, your new header cracks me up. I have driven cross Indiana up one side and down the other quite a bit. You need an Irish football up their with the IU basketballs tho!
Anglophile Football Fanatic’s last blog post..My First Weekly Winner
Crazy Road Signs « It’s An Insane World Out There
January 27, 2008 at 8:38 pm
[...] 27, 2008 by Sandy Jennifer at Playgroups are No Place for Children is moving out of state and posted about some crazy roadsigns she encountered. I thought I would [...]
jen
January 27, 2008 at 8:38 pm
wow, so if you don’t go to church you’ll be getting lots and lots of deviled ham! YUM!
Glad to see you back
jen’s last blog post..a head-scratcher
Devan
January 27, 2008 at 8:46 pm
That’s hilarious. I’ve seen the DEVIL sign so I know what you mean. hehe
Devan’s last blog post..Good news!
Sadie
January 27, 2008 at 8:49 pm
Welcome to podunk!!!
Too bad on the camera thing…soem of those would have been High-lar-ee-us to see!!
Glad the trip went smooth and that you gained internet access so quick!!! Hope you get settled in nice and smooth!!
Sadie’s last blog post..WeeklyWinner
Cathy
January 27, 2008 at 9:06 pm
Woohoo…You’re back. And really you weren’t gone long at all. So glad to hear you have internet.
Can’t wait to hear how much you love Indiana.
Cathy’s last blog post..My First Weekly Winners
Blue Momma
January 27, 2008 at 11:18 pm
That devil sign is on I65 north of Montgomery! I laugh every time I drive past it!
Come on, you’ll miss Alabama won’t you? (Said as I cry because you got out and I didn’t).
Blue Momma’s last blog post..Lab Rats R Us
Lynn
January 28, 2008 at 8:30 am
Ah, I know those signs well. I think bungalow is the word you’re looking for. I know there’s a “B00bie Bungalow” down there somewhere. Classy, no matter what the name, huh? There’s also a “Used Cows for Sale” sign somewhere between my house and my sister’s but I think it’s along the Bluegrass Parkway, so you wouldn’t have passed it.
Glad you made it safely to Indiana, and hope you make many happy memories there.
Irene
January 28, 2008 at 10:01 am
I actually haven’t driven in Alabama, but I have been through many parts of West Virginia (almost the same thing).
It is SO funny because it seems that in some of the southern rural areas, on one side of the road are the signs for the church going folks, on the other are the adult bonanza stores. The question is…which came first????
Irene’s last blog post..Great news!!!!
Queen of Shake Shake
January 28, 2008 at 10:40 am
Isn’t that sign somewhere around Birmingham or northwards?
I swear I’ve seen it too but maybe there’s more than one. Wouldn’t be surprised.
Queen of Shake Shake’s last blog post..I Had Some Friends But They’re Gone…
justmylife
January 28, 2008 at 10:41 am
Did you run across the Naked Diner? I am serious a resturant where the waitresses are nude. I wonder if they have to wear hair nets down there too. Glad you enjoyed the billboards along the way, it is amazing what you see.
justmylife’s last blog post..I’m alive and giving Thanks!
AMomTwoBoys
January 28, 2008 at 10:42 am
Scary. Seriously scary.
I’m crying a bit that you didn’t have your camera because those pictures would have been serisouly entertaining.
I’m trying to figure out how I can use seriously one more time.
Oh, I know…I SERIOUSLY love your new header. Seriously.
See, now it doesn’t even sound like a real word. I seriously rock.
AMomTwoBoys’s last blog post..In Case You Didn’t Love Him Enough Already…
Auburn Gal Always
January 28, 2008 at 11:00 am
My BIL pastors a church right there near that sign. It’s not HIS sign, but I’ll bet he gets some unfortunate associations with it.
There’s some good fishing in that lake where the sign is.
Auburn Gal Always’s last blog post..I am a rock star!
SJSFalter
January 28, 2008 at 11:17 am
And its the crazy crap like this that makes me slightly interested in moving back to the states. The joy of road trips. I would have been cracking up and yelling “pull over buddy, we got a photo op I cant let you pass by” at which point my husband would floor the gas pedal.
SJSFalter’s last blog post..Nights
Anne Glamore
January 28, 2008 at 11:28 am
That sign is just north of Prattville, if it’s the one by the water wheel. One year there was a big storm that destroyed part of it, but it was fixed within moments.
I think the Boobie bungalow is north of Bham.
(In my fulltime lawyering days when I went to every single county for hearings I was an I-65 whore)
Anne Glamore’s last blog post..How We Parent – Just Because You Asked
Kimberly C
January 28, 2008 at 11:29 am
I have a picture of that sign! I will have to find it sometime, isn’t it just north of Montgomery?
Kimberly C’s last blog post..Apparently I want for my husband to hate me.
Meredith
January 28, 2008 at 11:30 am
We saw some funny billboards driving from Arkansas to St Louis a few years ago — “Who’s your Daddy?” Then below it, it said something about getting paternity tests. I felt like we were watching an episode of Maury Povich. I’m not sure which interstate or state they were in, but I thought they were hilarious.
Miss
January 28, 2008 at 1:54 pm
Oh if only you had the camera! LOL I guess those signs made for quite the interesting drive.
Miss’s last blog post..Things that are pissing me off Vol. 1
Jerseygirl89
January 28, 2008 at 3:41 pm
Have you ever seen the GI-Normous Jesus on I-70 in Illinois? And then a few miles later there are signs for adult entertainment. People miss so much when they fly places.
Jerseygirl89’s last blog post..Warning: Adult Topics
Christina
January 28, 2008 at 9:38 pm
Yay! Glad you made it safely, and you have internet access!
Those signs sound hilarious. You should come to Ohio and drive down I-75 sometime. There’s a giant Jesus statue (like 150 ft. high – see Heywood Banks song “Big Butter Jesus”) coming out of a pond on one side of the interstate. And on the other side of the interstate at that exit? Hustler Hollywood. Oh yeah.
Christina’s last blog post..Haiku Friday: Cooking Plastic Cupcakes
Laura McIntyre
January 29, 2008 at 5:21 am
You americans have the funniest signs, no matter where you go here the best you would see is “little chef , 3.5 miles”
Laura McIntyre’s last blog post..Blogthings
HRH
January 29, 2008 at 7:21 pm
OMG. That is so funny. I loved the post and will go see the newly posted picture, but I came for Mom Two Boys comments which were seriously good too. This was a total win/win blogtrip.
HRH’s last blog post..The information General Mills is withholding from the mommy public…
Siobhan
January 30, 2008 at 12:45 am
Okay, I HAVE to comment, just because you said “ARSE”. Some states are so funny with their ‘homemade’ billboards. What’s the direct line to the FCC?
Siobhan’s last blog post..Makes Scents
Not That I Have Any Wrinkles, You Know, But If I Did… | Playgroups are No Place For Children
February 1, 2008 at 2:42 pm
[...] Sorry, No Pictures Comments protected by Lucia’s Linky Love. [...]
Matt
July 25, 2008 at 8:05 pm
More good stuff from a woman that certainly knows how to deliver. Thanks for all the laughs…
Matts last blog post..Best Flashlight Store