Comments on: Drop Kicking a Four-Year-Old Bully

By: Anji

Anji — Sun, 03 Aug 2008 13:20:41 +0000

Maybe I’m just a total bitch but I would have yelled at the parent.

I have a very well-spoken British accent, which immediately makes people listen the hell up. I probably would have gone with something like “Excuse me, are you watching your child? Because he/she is bullying the other children horribly and has just hit/scratched/whatever my kid and several others.”

Then I probably would have gotten into an argument. I’m a fat chick with a shaved head, other mums generally don’t try to get physical with me.

Anjis last blog post..Boris

By: PRM

PRM — Tue, 29 Jul 2008 19:12:54 +0000

I am a mom of a BRINDLEY…..I adopted my daughter at age 4 and it has been a constant battle for me to teach her respect and boundaries.

I know people look at my daughter’s behaviors and just figure I am not caring or trying or I’m a horrible parent…but I am doing everything I can!!!…and I appreciate DEEPLY anyone bringing it to my attention so I can handle it. I can’t always keep my eye on her every second, and she is sneaky enough to pay attention to when I am watching and when I am not. She will wait and watch for the moments when I am distracted and then take advantage of that moment.

I have even began having to go to school with her or show up there at random times just to prove I am always paying attention.

The behavior only gets worse when she is SUCCESSFUL at her manipulations and bully-ing…..PLEASE for the good of the child, STEP IN and bring it to my attention.

The “what are YOU gonna do about it” attitude comes from her experience in her first home where no one did anything about any poor behaviors…..And I cannot leave that question unanswered…I want my child to know that boundaries exist even if I’m not watching.

She’s 7 now and the bully-ing has mostly stopped….but every once in awhile it starts up again and takes me by surprise. Time-Ins work WONDERS for that behavior….I also appreciate anyone kind enough to give her the “No one will like you if you don’t learn to be nice” Lecture…The more people she hears it from the better chance it has of sinking in!

By: MzMelanie

MzMelanie — Mon, 28 Jul 2008 19:56:47 +0000

I usually only correct children if they physically push or hurt my son. I do try and get their own parents involved. If that doesn’t work and I’m put into a situation where I have to correct someone else’s child I have no problem doin it to protect my own from physical harm.

By: Ted

Ted — Sat, 28 Jun 2008 12:06:40 +0000

My daughter’s name is Brynlee It seems to me as if the parents of bullies actually enjoy seeing their children act this way. I think you handled it perfectly. Where were the parents of the other children, and why didn’t they say anything?

By: Susan

Susan — Sun, 25 May 2008 14:04:49 +0000

Lol, I can totally relate. I too, am an SLP for the schools, and cringe every time I see a situation like this. I want so badly to discipline, but bite my tongue many times (And you know how hard biting your tongue is for an SLP). Susan's last blog post..Super Stylish Saturday

By: an ex stay at home dad

an ex stay at home dad — Mon, 19 May 2008 12:22:22 +0000

I have been on both sides of the parenting dilemma. Usually I thank a person who steps in to say something to one of mine. And repeat what they said.

And as an umpire for 10 and 9 year olds, I have learned a voice and a look that kids will listen to. (Get close, speak with authority, treat them like adults.) “That’s enough, gentleman.” And they will know what you are talking about.

I have been also thanked by other parents as I have corrected theirs. (Little things like batting a baseball outside of the batting cages)

By: Let’s Hear From Our Judges | Playgroups are No Place For Children

Let’s Hear From Our Judges | Playgroups are No Place For Children — Wed, 07 May 2008 15:14:45 +0000

[...] sweet tea in her kid’s sippy cup? A little girl that I think is dressed like a tramp? A mom not watching her brat kid at Chick-Fil-A? Oh, I’ve [...]

By: frootbat31

frootbat31 — Sat, 19 Apr 2008 14:09:13 +0000

I would’ve said something to the mother if I saw her bullying all the other kids. Yes you took care of your own child, but where were the mothers of all the other children? I believe it takes a village to help raise a child- this is more true than ever in today’s society.
If the mother didn’t handle her daughter, then you can complain to the Chik-Fila manager to ask them to leave. Your child (and yourself) have a right to enjoy the place without being bullied, harassed, or otherwise upset.
in my ever-humble opinion.

By: Auctions

Auctions — Mon, 10 Mar 2008 06:04:30 +0000

This is a tough one. Their is not much one can do in this kind of situation. You did the right thing though. You made both parties happy. our child was safe and you didn't hurt Brindley either. It's ultimately upto the parents to teach and discipline their children. Auctions's last blog post..Phyllis

By: Mia, The Childcare Lady

Mia, The Childcare Lady — Sat, 08 Mar 2008 01:42:53 +0000

No, its hard to do, but the right thing to do is to stick your nose in.
I would have gone something like “Hi, excuse me, sorry – I’m so jealous that you guys have some one to chat with :big smile: no, no, we’re just leaving – I just needed to let you know that your little Brindley was a little out of control out there. You should probably keep an eye on her so she doesn’t hurt one of the little kids when she pushes them over. :another big very genuine smile: :leave:

(I’m very good at being very friendly and very genuine and telling people stuff in a non accusatory manner.)

Its so hard to be a mother of a ‘bad kid’. Mostly they are in denial that their child does anything wrong, mostly they think its ‘just normal’ because they lack perspective.
So, I think a good tactic is to give them a small feedback that there is a problem. Can you imagine if everytime she was out at a playground someone quietly mentioned her child was a problem?

I’m of the boring school of thought that we are all building the future everyday in how we let our (their) children be. If everyone ignores the fact that her child is a demon on wheels, how can she bear full responsibility for the molester and bank robber the child will grow into?