I am not the only adult in this family that sometimes has to share a shower with a very splashy two year old boy. Most weekends, Carson pesters Tate to join him in the shower.
This thrills me, as it means I get to shower completely and blissfully alone! However the thrill was recently completely obliterated when I learned what those two hooligans had been doing with my washcloth during their shower.
Before I tell you the horror, let me explain my washcloth “procedure.” I have a washcloth that I use for my face. ONLY my face. I do not use this washcloth on my nether regions or my feet or ANYWHERE else. ONLY my face! *ahem* As you can tell, I feel very strongly that this –dare I say sacred– washcloth be used for nothing other than cleaning my face.
So when Tate casually mentioned that he and Carson had used my sacred washcloth on the shower drain so that they could make a puddle for splashing, I was horrified….Especially horrified since I had just finished showering and washing my face with a washcloth, that unbeknownst to me, was contaminated.
“What’s the big deal?” Tate asked, while looking at me as if I had an alien doing the cha-cha on my forehead.
“What’s? The? Big? DEAL!” I roared. “The big deal is that MY washcloth was on the shower floor, gathering the filth that was dripping from your body. Hello! Formunda cheese and ass matter! And to make it even worse, it was touching the drain! ARGH! The gross, hairy draaaaiiiiin.” (Okay, so I’m over-dramatizing, slightly, but believe me when I say I was extremely irritated and disgusted.)
In all seriousness, though, I really don’t want my washcloth touching the shower floor or shower drain or being innundated by matter that might possibly be dripping from our bodies. Also, athlete’s face is a real concern. I think that the only logical solution, and the only solution that would set my mind at ease, is to get a fresh washcloth before every shower. Also, I will hide all the clean washcloths in my super-secret hiding spot to assure their sanitari-ness (I just made up that word). And maybe consider seeking help from a professional about my obvious issues.
All right Tate and Carson, let’s get ready to rummmmbbbbbllllle! Do you think that what they did with my FACE ONLY washcloth was gross?
(By the way, you all look extra lovely today, my Internet friends! So thin! And my! How perky your boobs look!)
First of all, thank you. I AM having a “good boob day”!
I feel your pain. My youngest son takes his showers with my husband every morning. ( This has been going on the majority of this school year ). I just found out a couple of weeks ago that my beloved shower poof has been used on my son’s bum. And not just the outemost regions, but actually in between the cheeks! I was thoroughly grossed out at the news, but the best part of the revelation? The look of utter surprise on my husbands face that there would be anything wrong with this pratice! Gross, gross gross!
Lord – all the comments I couldn’t even read because I had to get down here and say
EWWWWWWWWW!
One time wash cloth user here. It grosses me out when water sits all day accumulating little bacterias in their warm-moist-prime-retail-space environment.
(I’m only just realizing how deep my issues may go… hmmm.)
Good luck with the athlete’s face!!!
Danielle’s last blog post..Loveland Miscellany
How gross is that! I completely understand the “face only” wash cloth concept. I have a “face only” scrubbie and have been know to buy a new one when someone else uses “my” scrubbie to wash just their face with it. I cannot imagine how far I would fly around the room backwards if I saw it being used to remove other body filth and such!
Scarlet O’Kara’s last blog post..She Likes It! She Really Likes It!
YIKES!! Don’t touch the washcloth!! I know what you mean, though…hubs and I have arguments just like that sometimes, too…about very similar issues!!
Sadie’s last blog post..Hell Week…
I hear ya! And now I’m getting even more paranoid about my washcloth. I think I’ll get a fresh one too, just based on your story!
Becki’s last blog post..Thursday Thirteen – Seventh Edition
I totally understand!! I would be so upset if I found out I had used a contaminated wash cloth on my face. Maybe irrationally upset, but that’s just me.
I wash my face with my hands…but you never know where those have been either.
Poopsy’s last blog post..oh, go fly a kite.
O.mah.gawd. No you di-int just say fromunda cheese and ass matter.
That is without a doubt the funniest freakin thing I’ve heard in a while and my favorite part of the whole post. I must share that little gem of a phrase with my hubby at once
Oh and sorry about the washcloth
Worker Mommy’s last blog post..Thanks, for the complete and utter waste of time
That is so grim! But as a bonus, I get to add the super-fantastic funny phrases “fromunda cheese” and “ass matter” to my vocabulary.
andi’s last blog post..New house rules
Having a few (OK, MANY!) hangups about cleanliness and germs myself, I am freaked out by the thought of my FACECLOTH being on the DRAIN!!! Ewww!
I also am anti-bar soap– ever found a rogue hair on your bar of soap? Ick!
EWWW. You are SO right to be disgusted!!! I have gone so far as to give my husband a very specific, designated pair of nail clippers with which to cut his grotesque toenails (I can barely even type that word w/o gagging) after I found him using my VERY. FAVORITE. FINGERNAIL ONLY. CLIPPERS. So clearly, I have issues as well.
You look fabulous yourself.
And I don’t blame you for being upset. I don’t let Hubby use my special water cup because he always leaves cups – with juice or soda in them – out for days in his basement and I swear they never really recover. So I hide my water cup. I think you’ve got a great strategy now.
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THAT is so friggin’ disgusting… I say, that’s grounds for D-vorce.
~JJ!’s last blog post..In control
just.
ew.
and I’m sorry, but little boys totally pee in the shower too.
so do big boys.
Dawn @ Coming to a Nursery Near You’s last blog post..Something’s brewin’!
EWWWWWWWW! I’d have totally freaked out. That’s beyond disgusting.
Im wearing a new bra..glad to know it’s working!
Indygirl’s last blog post..Dress up
That is exactly why I must wash my washcloths and towels after every use!
erin’s last blog post..Forbidden Love
Oh, I’m totally with you on this one.
I also have a face washcloth and a body washcloth. And if the face one touched anything other than my face — including a drain — well, my reaction would be same.
(I have similar issues regarding kitchen sponges. Eew.)
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I just did a little research because I was confused why some of you were calling the nut sack cheese FRO munda instead of FOR munda…
Apparently, according to Urban Dictionary, they are both correct.
The more you know! *ding*
How do you feel about those lather thingies that aren’t cloth? I am so glad I work at a soap factory and have access to the best antimicrobial/anticrud formulas in the known universe.
And no one has ever commented on the alleged perkitude of my boobage before.
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Ewww!!!! We each have our own color of poof that I replace every 30 days. I grab a clean washcloth for my face before each shower.
Stephanie’s last blog post..Not coming…
My hubby has that same washcloth routine. I can only imagine how the world would stop revolving if baby and I pulled such a stunt…
Note to self: when in need of entertainment, shower with baby and use daddy’s face cloth for drain stop.
I loved the face athlete concern. too funny.
HRH’s last blog post..I have a winner…
I’m weird about my tweezers. They are for my facial hairs and my facial hairs only. So I can see your washcloth dilemma.
Jennifer 1 Tate 0
moosh in indy.’s last blog post..Shake, Freak Out and Roll.
Yeah, I’d defiantly hide a wash cloth. I couldn’t imagine how many creepy crawly germys were crawling over that wash cloth. You might want to stick you face in boiling water to kill all the germs (just kidding on the boiling water thing and seriously that is so gross!) My SIL stands on a wash cloth in the shower because she afraid of germs. If you thinks that a good idea you might want to see a therapist.
Marye~’s last blog post..This and That and the Other Thing
Oh Jennifer, that is funny! I am not a washcloth user but your title Athlete’s Face says it all!
And I agree that the “formunda cheese and ass” part was over the top hilarious!
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Oh, I feel your pain. I have a “special” hand towel that is only to be used by me for blotting my face dry. Imagine my horror when I found that that “special” towel has been used for drying hands of the boys in my house……uggg.
And… when I wash my face at night, I only use the washcloth once, then it gets thrown in the wash. I’m anal like that.
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Sorry I’m late. here via Robinella http://notastepfordwife.blogspot.com/
Have you seen the Butt/Face towels? White on one side for face, etc. brown on other for butt.
Actually quit surprised nobody mentioned it.
I’m so domestic I make myself sick.
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You last two lines just guaranteed I will be visiting regularly!
I came over via your stalker’s post about passing on an award to you.
I was afraid they had put the sacred washcloth between their butt cheeks, how nice it instead was in the drain, uh yeah. Guess it’s time for a new washcloth, maybe you should lock it up between uses so you know it’s still immaculate.
I’m here to help. 
Lisa’s Chaos’s last blog post..a-choo
I came for a visit from Robinella’s.
I am so with you on the wash cloth issue. I have my face only washcloths that better not be touched by anyone. Tate’s response was so much like my husband’s would be. Men!
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