Getting Through to Those Who Are Social Niceties Impaired

We have met every single person in our neighborhood.  It truly isn’t much of a feat considering there are only six other homes so far in my neighborhood.  Every person we’ve met is extraordinarily friendly (and I’m not  just saying that because several of them know about this blog and might be reading…**Hi neighbors!**)

Although that good for nothing Mother Nature didn’t bless us with the promised nice weather this past weekend, she has attempted to make up for it with the most perfect weather imaginable these past three days.  With this good weather, our family and most of my neighbors have taken every opportunity to get outside.  We wave at one another as we go for walks, or pedal by on a bicycles, or are outside watering the newly planted flowers.

We are a jovial bunch, me and the peeps in mah ‘hood.

I mention all of this because of ONE woman who lives in an adjoining neighborhood who has also been riding her bike in our neighborhood.  I certainly don’t mind if she rides in our neighborhood, it’s not as if we are a gated community trying to keep people out.  In fact there are lots of folks who meander into our neighborhood, waving and smiling as they walk past.

Except for that ONE woman.  I have said “hello” to her every evening, waved, and made eye contact.  Her response?

Nothing.

She just keeps pedaling away, without so much as a head nod to acknowledge my greeting.

The first time I thought that perhaps she didn’t hear me, possibly due to some sort of hearing impairment and NOT some sort of asshattery.  The second time, when I’m certain we were looking at one another, and she ignorned me yet again, I considered the possibility that she was blind and hearing impaired.  Seeing as how she was riding a bike and avoiding all the construction debris in the road, I feel confident that she is not blind.  I suppose it’s still a possibility that she’s hearing impaired, but my suspicion is that she’s social niceties impaired.  Or in other words some sort of asshattery is indeed at play here.

The next time she smugly pedals past my house, I’m tempted to yell at her, “Didn’t your mother teach you manners?!”  or “What’s your PROBLEM, HUH!?” or “HEEEELLLLOOOO!!!!!”  Of course, all of these sentences would be preceded by the always attention getting “Hey LAAAADDDY!”

But that would make me as obnoxious as her.

My goal is to get her to reciprocate a greeting.  I’d be happy with a nod, happier with a slight wave of the hand, and downright gleeful if she spoke back.  It’s a lofty goal, I know.  But, I won’t give up.  I’ll wave and say hello every. single. time. I see her until I get that coveted response.

Stick around for updates!  I’ll go make a pitcher of lemonade while you wait to show off my really awesome neighborly skills.