I feel safe telling you now that he’s on his way home*, that Tate has been on vacation this past week. And when I say vacation, I’m referring to the type of vacation that took him away from home for 6 days, enjoying the bliss known as being “child-free.” It was a full-on MAN vacation filled with bows and arrows and farting, so although I could have come along, I decided to take my chances with the kids.
I really don’t want to be THAT wife, the one who’s jealous and not supportive, the MARTYR. Considering that I’m going on 6 solo days of parenting, in an increasingly crappy rental, fresh from a move that I wasn’t too jazzed about, I think I’m handling his vacation rather well. Oops, there I go, being the martyr.
Anyway, several times Tate has called while on his CHILD-FREE vacation, complaining about something. My poor eyes have nearly rolled out of my head with his moaning. Seriously, who calls the spouse who’s SINGLE PARENTING to complain about their vacation!? Oh right, Tate did that. Tate, the one who promised to “love and cherish” me, not “leave me alone while he’s goes on vacation, only to call and COMPLAIN.” Oops, and there I go again with that darned martyrdom.
He’s also called a few times with MY honey-do list, because apparently taking care of two toddlers alone for 6 days leaves me with ample time to do grunt work. Before arriving home, I’m supposed to have done something about calling somebody, but I can’t remember because, uh oh!, I wasn’t listening. I’m also supposed to find recipes for persimmons (what???), but gosh darn if the Internet wasn’t down (*eyes roll straight outta my head*).
And since I’m so good at not being THAT martyr wife, I did what any good wife would do. I went shopping. Certainly 6 single parenting days earned me a some new shirts a pair darling little flats, and some EXPENSIVE makeup from Sephora.
*Just in case you’re a creepy Internet stalker and thinking that you’ve got a small window of time to come over before Tate gets home, I think it’s only fair that I tell you about my Rottweiler named Jeffrey Dahmer.
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