Basically potty training can suck it.
I hate it. What’s really WRONG with diapers anyway?
We’ve spent the last few days with Carson in underwear, except for outings (more about that later) and bedtime. We’ve also spent the last few days going to bathroom every 10 minutes.
Carson has peed on the potty ONE flippity-flapping time in these past few days. ONE.TIME.
I KNOW you’re supposed to wait until a child is “ready.” Well what the hell is ready anyway? He can pull his pants up and down. He knows if he’s peed or pooped in his diaper, though he will vehemently deny the existence of said waste. Sure he’s screamed things like “NO UNDERWEAAAAAAAAAAAAAR! and “I want to wear DIAPEEEEEEEEEEEEERS.” But he’s a headstrong kid with his own ideas and his own plans of how to do everything, though. Sometimes he just needs a little nudge.
And hoo boy, I’ve been nudging. Smiling while nudging, OF COURSE, and being patient while nudging, OF COURSE, but NUDGING.
Nudging is exhausting.
We started by going to the potty every 30 minutes as recommended by some STUPID potty training website. What this STUPID potty training website failed to mention was that 30 minutes is probably too long. Since I know that the definition of insanity is doing the same thing over and over again while expecting different results, I decided to head to the pot every 10 minutes instead. Have you ever hung out at a toilet EVERY 10 minutes before (besides after a night of excess in college)??? It’s still not fun.
Anyway, once he does actually potty train (like when he’s going off to COLLEGE, I’m guessing), how will we ever even leave the house? I mean, when a kid says they gotta go, THEY GOTTA GO, LIKE NOW! I’ve been imagining leisurely trips to Target being canceled because I had to pull over at a gas station, frantically trying to unbuckle TWO children from their car neats, screaming, “HOLD IT! Don’t pee, Carson! Wait!!” Running, dragging one toddler by the hand, the other in my arms, into the gas station just in time to see a wet ring form around Carson’s crotch.
And even if he was able to hold it?? Where is Ella supposed to hang out while I’m holding Carson over the toilet, attempting to keep his pristine hiney from touching the nasty, germ-infested toilet seat?? It’s not like she’ll politely stand right beside me, heeding mommy’s stern warnings not to touch ANYTHING. One kid crawling on a gas station floor while the other heavy one is being held over a toilet. This may very well be my version of hell.
It just occurred to me that I’ll have to always have extra clothes on hand so that WHEN this does happen, the leisurely Target trip won’t be canceled due to wet crotch issues. STILL. Potty training! I despise it.
Oh, Jen. Don’t hold back. Tell us how you REALLY feel.
It sucks. It is hard enough with just one little one to worry about. It never occured to me how difficult throwing the younger sibling into the mix would be. I feel for ya.
Misty´s lastest post..Shred Hangover
Potty training DOES suck. I finally told MG that it was illegal for her to wear diapers after her 3rd birthday. She had a couple of accidents, but since then she’s been fine.
We keep a small potty chair, plastic grocery baggies, toilet paper, and wipes in the van, for when we’re on the road and there’s nowhere safe/easy/clean to stop. It has come in very handy. Of course, it’s not as easy in cold weather…
You also learn really quickly where all the clean bathrooms in town are.
I put Claire in the cart (at Target) and make her sit in it (in the handicapped stall) while MG pees. Also, do you know anyone who has ever gotten a butt disease from a toilet seat? They’re not so bad. Hovering is silly. It’s much more important to wash your hands well afterward.
Have you tried rewards? M&Ms? Or stickers? How about a big prize at the end of, say, a week with no accidents? Something he can work toward? If I remember right, he’s older than MG, so he’s more than ready.
Good luck!
Amy
Amy´s lastest post..Happy New Year!
Yeah I tried. I lost. I drank.
She’s just not ready, even at two and a half.
Pushing her is getting me nowhere fast – nowhere except Very Frustrated and Also: WHERE IS MY VODKA.
I’ll try again in a few months when I forget the horror of these past couple weeks.
You know what else sucks about potty training? Once you’re potty trained, no one cares about it. No one is impressed. And if you casually work it into a conversation at a cocktail party, like “I don’t mean to brag, but I was potty trained by 23 months” people look at you like you’re insane. Unless they’re just jealous?
Marinka´s lastest post..As You Probably Know, I Have Model-Good Looks
I am SO with you on this. We haven’t even really started with potty training (Maggie’s not yet 2 yrs old) but just thinking about the future logistics of it all… am I crazy to think that diapers are just EASIER?? I mean, the mess is all contained, and I’ve changed enough diapers now (and some NASTY ones too) that they don’t bother me, plus I can do it in like 30 seconds.
Maybe diaper-wearing in kindergarten can be a new trend we start with our kids?
Jen´s lastest post..cute things about my kid today
Dude. Potty training DOES suck a big hairy one. Even once you get them trained, they have to pee in every random stall in the tri-state area. I mean I guess I just assumed, you’ve pissed all over one toilet seat, you’ve pissed all over them all, right? WRONG. I thought only dogs marked their territory.
We’re quite a sight– my four year old, my two year old, and my HUGE pregnant belly trying to squish in to the bathroom. We have a no-touching with the hands rule (and I mean ANYTHING,) but I plunk them right on the seat to do their deeds.
It gets better, it really does. Somewhere training and 3 1/2 the novelty wore off and my son just took care of business without fanfare.
The Other Dawn´s lastest post..Housekeeping
Oh no. I am so sorry! We are getting ready to start now (reading the books, occasionally wearing pull-ups, etc) and I dread the day it begins in earnest.
iMommy´s lastest post..Starting the 2009 Chapter in Our Lives
There was a time when I judged people who didn’t have their kids potty-trained by age 2, but now I realize they are effin’ GENIUSES. It is sooooo much easier to just change a diaper than it is to deal with a kid screaming, “I need to potty!” in the back seat of your car while you are stuck in traffic with NOWHERE TO GO. *ahem* Not that it has ever happened to me.
(Seriously, what the eff? The kid goes DAYS without asking to go, but then is frantic to go the second I’m stuck in traffic? What IS THAT?)
Burgh Baby´s lastest post..Not Exactly What I Would Call "Layering"
My absolute best advice. Hold your hand over the automatic flusher until he’s off the potty. Or else you will NEVER get him to pee in a public potty again. Scares the jeebers out of them. And sometimes me!
Heidi´s lastest post..Crossing the Red River into The Lone Star State
Don’t feel bad!!! BH JUST THIS PAST MONTH OR TWO GOT POTTY TRAINED. Did I mention he turned 4 on the 31st?
That’s right…he was almost FOUR when he finally decided to potty.
FOUR.
Yes, there will be accidents…we had one on the train one day going on a family outing and of course that train had no bathrooms. Bless him, he peed all over himself and was soo embarrassed. Though we were able to change him expertly in the seat with no one noticing.
Yes, you will need to carry extra clothes (don’t forget shoes and socks…BH was sitting on his feet when he peed himself). Maybe even a few extra clothes. BH has his own bag now with several pairs of underwear and pants and socks just in case.
He hasn’t had any accidents though other than the train incident.
I can’t give you any tips. I am not really sure what clicked in his head. We did get him to pee with a timer…you also have to make sure to give them plenty to drink…the poop was the worst and I am not sure what finally occured to him that potty was better.
I feel your pain though, be patient and don’t rush it. He might be FOUR as well when he decides to go…
*hugs*
Sandy´s lastest post..Deep Breath
Potty training = test of parental sanity.
We’re doing potty training with boy #2 right now and let me tell ya – the “big brother does it! doesn’t it look GREAT?!?” works wonders for the little one’s motivation. Until he decided he needs to pee standing up, too, that is. GAH.
both of my girls started potty training themselves … at just over a year old.
don’t ask.
i didn’t DO anything. (unless cloth diapers have something to do with it? i’m sure it feels colder and worse.)
really. it’s also a wee bit sucky from this angle too, ’cause when you are one? you have to pee all. the. time.
so, yeah. i know about the “pleasepleaseplease don’t touch anything!” request.
best of luck to you.
jen´s lastest post..marriage potential.
Just a thought, I’m well aware you are there and you know best, but if he can’t hold it 30 minutes, maybe he’s really not ready. If he’s not ready it is a frustrating, aggravating, horrible thing, but when they are ready, in my experience, it’s pretty easy. I have 4, One was potty trained just before 2 and a half, one was three and a half. It’s not worth fighting the battle if they’re not ready.
When they are ready, and they do get it, it’s not as bad to go out as you’re thinking. But yes, always have a change of clothes with you–at least in the car–always.
Mom24@4evermom´s lastest post..Finally! 20/20 Hindsight!
Good Luck!! I waited until they were 3 (boys)and then started. With #1 it was a struggle, I finally bribed him telling him I would take him to soccer if he was potty trained. Then it was instant (2days). #2 wasn’t so easy it took a while, we used m&m’s and it worked well. I also set the kitchen timer and would take him in every 15 min. I am not looking forward to #3.
The biggest thing is they know they have total control of the situation. And when you want them to do it they won’t just out of spite.
I wouldn’t over pressure him. Like someone else said if he’s going every 10 minutes he may not quite be ready..yet.
Are you in a rush to get him trained for pre-school? If not than I wouldn’t rush him.
Not that I’m giving assvice or anything..not me never.
Jean@workingmomma247´s lastest post..A Simple Womans Day Book
I’d buy a little Bjorn potty and keep it in the car — I’d rather do that than try to keep one kid off the floor while carrying another.
I’ll be at that stage soon. Solidarity, sister!
@ Amy, It’s not just that I’m worried about a dirty seat, but rather his size. He’ll fall right in a regular size toilet!
The idea about a potty seat in the car is genius! I hadn’t thought of that!
Wait until summer and let him start peeing outside. Boys love it.
Buy yourself some M&M’s or Skittles and bribe the living bejebus out of him.
Knot
Knot´s lastest post..A Tale Of Courage
I hate potty training. That’s my my mother trained my son and why my 3 year old daughter is still not (anywhere near) potty trained. My mother-in-law is convinced that I’m doing her permenant damage but a) she’s just barely three b) my mother-in-law is an idiot and c) did I mention that I REALLY hate potty training?
Jen´s lastest post..Will poop for painkillers
I am so with you this one. My two and a half year old actually got off the potty and peed on the rug not once but twice in our one day of attempted potty training.
@Knot, Oh we have m&m’s! He’s also been bribed with pennies for his piggy bank. (Which incidentally, I’d normally not “pay” my kid to poop, but he doesn’t have any idea what money is for, he just likes having something to put in his piggy bank!)
@Beth Yeah, Carson sits on the pot, nothing happens, but two minutes later he’s peeing on the floor.
@jen I definitely think cloth diapers have a lot to do with potty training success. I really wanted to use cloth diapers, but Tate said he wouldn’t help change diapers if he had to use cloth diapers (because I guess poop in cloth is somehow grosser than in a diaper???). At the time I was deluded into thinking he’d really help. Ha!
When the 2nd kid came along and I brought up cloth diapers again, he said it would be silly to invest in cloth diapers for just one kid. GRRR!
I hear your pain! I potty-trained my daughter at 2.5–by force. She was NEVER going to admit to being ready–she doesn’t work that way. Books? whatever!! –my G didn’t care if Elmo pees on a potty or not. Don’t waste time or money on pull-ups (at least for training) They are diapers–kids know this. The hardest part is when they get distracted and don’t want to go. The easiest part is that they don’t go quite as often as we do–so outings are not that dangerous…seriously, G goes once for every 6-7 times I do (must be all the coffee). And balancing baby while G perches precariously on a nasty park potty–been there. not fun. oh well. Good luck!
Annjeanette Martin´s lastest post..Dabbling in Fashion
You know, Dr. Phil says to just let them run around totally naked for two days. He said they won’t be able to stand it getting on them and will start using the potty.
And I imagine that you’d be using a steam cleaner for the next month.
Betsey Booms´s lastest post..VH-1, Here I Come
Amy from Pretty Babies just sent me this link for a possible solution for Ella while Carson is peeing in a public restroom…funny, brilliant, and so wrong all at the same time.
http://www.sfgate.com/cgi-bin/blogs/parenting/detail?blogid=29&entry_id=12882
@Betsey If it was summertime, Carson’s naked hiney would be outside all the time for training! ha!
I’ve heard Dr. Phil say that, too, and I’m sure it works, but at quite a nasty price!
How old is he? Just barely three or almost 4? Drew “got” it around 3 and a half. If you’re concerned about outings, have him wear a pull-up for them… then you don’t have to deal with the public bathrooms. Ella will be SO MUCH EASIER, I promise you.
Moriah @ Please Pass the Salt´s lastest post.."I’m 5 now, Mommy."
I’d love to let my boy run around outside naked to try and start training. Except it’s minus a bajillion here and he’d freeze it off.
Teri´s lastest post..History
I hate potty-training. We finished with our daughter about a year ago, and gah, now I can’t remember what worked and didn’t work with her, and now we have to try and potty-train my son,
. He’s like yours and is like “I too small” when it comes to underwear, no matter if he’s got to choose them or not.
Your kids are pretty close in age, right? Then hold off until Ella’s ready and get yourself a two-for-one deal out of it.
All of this stress and heartache is so not worth it!
Slacker Mama´s lastest post..the upside of insomnia
I started trying to PT my oldest son when he turned two. It was horrible. He was all gung-ho to wear the Thomas underpants (tons and tons of Thomas underpants) but actually using the bathroom didn’t appeal to him at all. I can honestly say I potty-trained him for a solid year and he finally “got it” at three years, three months.
With Son Two, I didn’t even bring out the underwear until he turned three. I put the plastic potty in the bathroom and sometimes he’d be curious and want to sit on it and I’d let him and sometimes he’d pee and I’d tell him how great that was, but that was it. At three years, three months, he had pretty much trained himself.
They sell some sort of foldable potty seat to put over potties, but I don’t know how sanitary that would be to carry around.
andria´s lastest post..I’m Back!
I started both of my boys before they realized they should be fighting it. Luckily it worked and we were done with diapers by a little over 2 years old. I hope this next one is as easy as I am finding I was blessed with easy to potty train boys. With boys, it is so easy for those all of a sudden potty emergencies… empty plastic water bottle. “Winkies” fit right down in there and they can pee to their heart’s delight and just cap it till you can dump it! We also bought the portable potty that you put grocery bags in so they could poop. I can’t stand taking them into stalls because they just have to touch everything.
Good luck!
Shanna´s lastest post..The new year
You are at the very difficult and exhausting and kill-me-before-I-kill-someone times in your life. AKA potty training. Right now, it would be EASIER to leave him in diapers forever. But soon – or maybe never – it will all be behind you. At least with a boy and considering you’re in Tennessee with my Northerly Fellow Hillbillies, you’ll be right at home by just letting him pee on the side of the road.
Auburn Gal Always (Keri)´s lastest post..opinions please
All I can say is this is EXACTLY why I never rush it! Diapers are nothing compared to going into every bathroom cause your kid thinks its cool and swears they have to go. And if they are my daughter they can actually make pee come out EVERY DAMN TIME! So I can’t get mad at her. Rylee just turned 2 and I will not even attempt to potty train til next summer sometime. Good Luck!
Rachel´s lastest post..I can only imagine what I look like at this point
I just flew to NY for the 15th alone with my kid and this is the first time I didn’t take an extra set of clothes. She’s 5 and a half now.
I used to wake mine in the middle of the night and take her to the potty b/c that is what some dumbass book told me to do. I did for three months. I nearly killed myself.
Jessica Bern´s lastest post..Dumb and Dumber and DUMBEST.
There are many words that come to mind when I think about potty training, none of them you want left in your comments. My 29 month old wants nothing to do with it. The bathroom has become a war zone, panties and pull ups are met with screams of no no no. Yet 5 minutes later she’ll be telling me “I big girl mommy”. Lucky me, I get to start this process all over with my son in about 10 months.
Stacey´s lastest post..Come on Daddy
Hi! I come over from Barefootfoodie.
I would like to share with you what worked for us when we went through a horrible potty training experience. We called it “Naked Weekends” Just make sure you have everything you need for the weekend – no last minute running to the store. Wake up. Strip the kid. Keep the Kid that way all day. Oh yeah, we bribed with cake. A BIG ICE CREAM cake, at the end of the weekend, IF he went potty.
Something to ponder on…
BTW – Love the blog and will try to catch up!
Average Girl´s lastest post..HAPPY NEW YEARS
OMG this is giving me heart failure. How are you supposed to get ANYTHING done when you’re in the bathroom every 10 minutes? How are you supposed to have a life? DOH!
Shelly´s lastest post..The Reveal
See, now don’t you feel pissed off that no one told you this shit when he was born? BUt, yes, extra clothing is a must. Or cash to buy more. And we went to a carnival one time pulling a wagon and in the wagon? A potty seat. And we definitely used it. Seriously, getting a potty chair for the car isn’t a bad idea for emergencies – that way you can get him to go right away without getting Ella out of the car. Then just pour out the pee-pee onto the ground. I know, gross. But, is it grosser than having his pristine buns sitting on the germy toilet of a Shell station?
Texan Mama´s lastest post..My New Most Favoritest TV Show
Yup, we saved A LOT of $$ while potty training the kids because we went NO WHERE while we did it!
abunslife´s lastest post..Back to Life, Back to Reality
I feel your pain! Trying to start with my Ella, who’s 2 and a bit…She seems ready but it’s exhausting! Especially with #2 on the way. Not fun.
I DESPISED potty training. I felt like this was when people would figure out I had no idea what I was doing! We did the portable potty in the car (I had the same issue–what to do with the younger sibling) which worked great. My son actually did better when we were out–we’d go to the mall and just stop at every bathroom we came to and he’d usually go. He was always too distracted at home by all his “stuff” and would have more accidents. Good luck and I hope he gets it soon!
This is EXACTLY why I am in no hurry to potty train girl the third. She turned 2 in Sept, which is waaaay too young, in my book. She loves to go on the potty at home, but I’ll be goddamned if I am ready to sit in every public bathroom in Tiny Town while she may or may not pee there.
There is a silver lining to diapers. In fact, I loooove a diapered child.
Throw in the towel- you will all be happier. =)
Marie Green´s lastest post..Photo a Day Project
Yes, potty training does suck. BIG TIME.
We have had a portable potty in our car for almost a year now and will probably have it there for a few years to come.
It is priceless. Seriously.
Devan´s lastest post..The Resolutions
WE have a travel potty in our van too! It is the BEST.THING.EVER! here is the link for it. and the change of clothes is not so bad. just stick it in a ziploc and put it in your trunk or under a seat. here is to hoping things get better!
I’m miserable just thinking about potty training my twins. . . .especially with a brand new baby. And we just made the leap to cloth diapers so they can stay in diapers for years to make sure I get my $$$ out of them for all I care!
BlueBella´s lastest post..Our First All Nighter!
potty training. I detested potty training so much it made me not want to have anymore kids. Seriously. Then I got a puppy which is just as bad. I Lived outside for weeks. I feel your pain.
kristin´s lastest post..Hula Girl
It’s official. Bub is wearing diapers forever. It was actually official after someone told me that advantage of having a boy is that they can pee in a old water bottle in the car (in a bottle? in the car?!) This just solidified my decision.
Mama Bub´s lastest post..Send Help