Some days are orderly and scheduled. We wake up early, I shower, we have a goal and a plan for the day. It could be as small as a trip to Target or even to the post office. Breakfast is served, followed by a snack around 10, lunch at noon, naps at 2. The house is tidy, free of stray toys underfoot, the beds are made, I’m wearing make-up, I may not even look at the computer until late afternoon when the children are napping.
On these days I feel accomplished. The children watch less TV, I interact directly with them more. These are the days that I feel the best, or at least better.
But then there are most days.
These are the days where I have nothing planned. We eat breakfast, I forget to shower, later I forget to serve a snack. At 12:15 I realize that I’m late serving lunch and that I’m still wearing pajamas. The majority of the day has been spent either in front of the television or in front of the computer. I don’t like these days because wearing pajamas seems like a great idea in the morning, but by afternoon, it makes me feel like a loser. I don’t like these days because I feel guilty for not having some fun and educational activity with the kids.
In the event that I do decide to get myself and the kids out the door, it’s usually too late because by the time I’ve showered and found the children’s shoes, it’s nearly noon. It would be foolish to take the children out at lunchtime or this close to naptime.
On these lazy days I rush to get the house in order, dishes washed, mail put in it’s proper place, toys thrown back in the playroom before Tate comes home. I’d hate for Tate to see that we basically did nothing for the entire day. These days kind of embarrass me.
I’m trying to forgive and allow myself to enjoy, or at least not beat myself up, on these days. Of course, I’ve been trying this for three years as a stay at home mom, but really for probably longer I’ve hated these types of days.
Despite most of my days being seemingly unproductive, my house is still somehow mostly clean, aside from some handprints on the windows, some dust on the end tables, and crumbs under the children’s chairs. I sometimes completely forget about laundry that has become increasingly wrinkled waiting in the dryer, but more importantly, my family wears clean underwear and socks everyday. I provide 3 mostly healthy meals everyday, and sometimes I even remember snacks.
When can I allow myself to be at peace with this life and not feel like I must DO and FACILITATE everyday? What’s really so wrong with not showering one day when I won’t see anyone but my children and husband? Pajamas all day at least mean that I don’t dirty more outfits.
What are your days like? Do you allow yourself these lazy days?
Our days are mostly like this too. When you figure out how to make peace with it, please write about it
Katie´s lastest post..DWTS/ WDPT Weekend
Oh my, you just described most of my days! Pre-school days I am forced to leave the house, so at least I feel slightly productive. My favorite days are the days my husband is off and we spend together running around everywhere.
mandy´s lastest post..Please Pray
we all have days that are less than we want. I am right there with ya. It is like the way to view the nutritional intake of a toddler- over the course of a week..some day s they will eat nothing and some a lot- it all evens out. ox
amy´s lastest post.."Patches! We don’t need to stinkin’ patches!"
those days sound a LOT like mine. i am a little bit lucky, though, because my kids nap earlier in the day, so i can usually cram an afternoon outing into the day. and i shower at night after they’re in bed, so i don’t have to worry about that… but unfortunately, my husband works from home and knows just exactly how many lazy days we have :-/
oh yeh, and i pretty much never have days where i’m dressed before noon. it just doesn’t happen.
MommyNamedApril´s lastest post..Who Says You Can’t Buy Friends?
I don’t know if I “allow” myself these days or if I sometimes just can’t fight the apathy that comes with my SAHM “job.” Most (really, most) days I’m up early and showered and ready for the day. But I do have days when I realize that nobody here cares if I’m clean or wearing “day clothes” and I feel a bit bored and defeated by being a slave to snacks and naps. Fortunately those days are few.
Teresa´s lastest post..Not about the shoes
When I’m at home with the girls, a lot of my days are like that. In fact, I probably could have written that post… it’s tough! It’s hard to be “on” all the time.
That is exactly why I work full-time. I would never allow myself to just be Ok with it — and I’d just feel like a loser all the time.
SAHM’s put way too much pressure on themselves, you included young lady! ; )
I feel like its my job to provide security, love and evidence values to my children. I am not their playmate or their pre-school teacher or craft teacher or a coach. Their amusement is their responsibility and they learn by trying again and again and by being with eachother. I don’t know if it’s guilt about not making a financial contribution or the pernicious influence of the media or both, but it looks to me like Mom’s are trying to hard to all things rather than allowing themselves to just be the best of what they are?
juliet´s lastest post..Ignorance