It all started about a month ago when Carson woke up in the middle of the night from a nightmare. He had dreamed that his bed was crawling with bugs. For weeks, every night before bed and sometimes in the middle of the night, he’d scream until Tate or myself would check his bed for bugs.
About the time that his nightmare occured, I started noticing centipedes in the kids’ bathroom. (I suppose it’s possible that there really had been bugs in Carson’s bed, but at the time, I’d only seen centipedes in the bathroom.)
Tate and I tried to avoid any accidental meetings between Carson and the centipedes. One evening, while the kids were in the bathtub, a centipede suddenly dropped from the ceiling in the bathtub. Trying not to freak out, I plastered on a fake smile and in my best sing-songy voice said, “Oopsy! There’s a little bit of lint that fell in the bathtub,” while shooting GET THE FRACKING BUG OUT OF THE TUB THIS INSTANT!!!!-looks at Tate.
Which, by the way, have you ever seen a centipede??? Oh the heebie-jeebies! So many legs, so icky!
Before bath time each night, Tate would check the bathroom, doing a thorough “lint”-sweep. If ever we saw a bug, I’d try not to squeal while picking up the “lint” with the biggest wad of toilet paper I could get. “Oh my! So much “lint” in the bathroom!”
Tate and I thought we were so clever.
Which brings us to this morning when I was awakened by Carson yelling from the bottom of the stairs. “MOMMY!!! MOMMY!!! HURRY!!! THERE’S A PIECE OF LINT ON THE STAIRRRRRRRRRS!”
I rushed downstairs to Carson to find him looking horrified and pointing at the bottom step.
“Mommy, I was getting ready to come upstairs and I saw this huge (pronouced “hooge”) piece of lint. See it? It’s right under there??”
I crouched down and saw the “lint,” an enormous centipede staring back at me in all it’s zillion-leg glory (and evil red eyes, that I *might* have just imagined.)
So I guess we weren’t so clever after all. And I’m thinking that I need to call an exterminator today.
“Oh my! So much ‘lint’ in the bathroom!” AHAHAHAHAHAHAHAHAHAHAHAHAHAHAHAHAHAHAHAHHAHAHAHAHAHAHAHAHAHHAAHAH!
priceless.
There are just certain creepy crawlies I can’t handle and centipedes are WAYYYYY up on the EEEEKKKK! list. Keep in mind my boys keep a snake in the living room so I am pretty laid back about uglies but Yikes I would have to move out until the problem was solved. Uuugh.
I’m the least scared person I know. Bugs? fine. Mice? Okay.
But centipedes? Make me squeal like a girl.
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I’m so glad that you are calling in the “bug guy”!! You live in a wooded area now, and bugs happen! We do a quarterly spray (3 times just outside) and we don’t have a problem any more. You will all sleep better with no more LINT.
OMG, we had those things all over my old job. A cosmetology school. I hate to generalize but most of our students were young women with a very strong EEK! reflex. Made the days interesting, someone always screaming for the maintenance guy to come get the latest intruder. *shudder*
I thought you were writing about centipedes one would find outside – shiny black shell with a bazillion legs. When I got to the link part, I thought, pshaw, I know what one looks like. Then I went back and looked. And yeah, that’s so not cool. Either way, having one of those in my house would freak me out, but the house one just seems way too fuzzy and icky.
Janine´s lastest post..What’s next? Mini fridge? Shaving? Sleep treading??
Ah, the joys of life in the south. I had all but forgotten about centipedes and giant hissing cockroaches til we relocated back below the Mason Dixon Line. YUK!
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Oh I admire your fortitude in being able to feign the cool and calm response. I got wigged out just READING about the centipedes. Tell Carson he’s not alone, I lose all composure around lint too!
Jo@Mylestones´s lastest post..A Trying Season and A Season Trying
I have seen a total of 3 of those suckers in my bathroom – and they freak me out. Ugh!
And now his preschool teacher is going to wonder why he calls them “lint”!
Cathy´s lastest post..Happy Monday – The LAST Snow Storm
Centipedes may be the only thing in the world that creep me out worse than spiders. EEEEEWWWWWWW. damn. I get the shivers just thinking about it.
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I use the largest wad of toilet paper whenever I have to pick up ANY bug. ARGH!!!
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Blech! This post gave me the heebie jeebies. Now I’m scared that there will be lint in my bathroom.
Smart kid. You could try calling them warm fuzzy bunnies and I would still squeal when in contact with a centipede. Nice try though. A for effort.
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It’s so funny that he just accepted the new term for the bugs!
Parents are rarely clever enough!
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I’m impressed that you haven’t packed up and gone to a hotel until the ickies are gone. It’s making my skin crawl, just thinking about it. Reminds me of when, years ago, I lived in a very old house in Bristol, TN, and we had silverfish (earwigs) in the attic apartment where I lived, and one dropped on me once and I am not sure I have recovered from that yet.
Hope your bugs go away soon!
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See, they really do believe everything we tell them. I think Raid is on sale at Menards this week.
Darn kids always figuring things out! At Halloween, when Sabrina would ask what we were eating (stolen from her stash), we would say “chicken” because she hates it. Then one day, I had a mini-hershey bar and she started whining for “chicken!”. Heh.
Hope your centipedes go away soon! We saw some in the apartment we had when we first moved to TN and I was freaked out by how fast they moved!
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It never even occurred to me that you could have a centipede infestation. Never. Now I’m pretty sure they’re crawling all over me.
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oh my holy hell woman.
yikes.
call the exterminator. NOW.
yeesh. I have the heebie jeebies now, too. ugh.
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I’m not familiar with those. Are they the ones that would suck some blood from a person or animals?
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Bleeeccchhh!!!! I am shuddering. Those are EVIL.
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Ewww..we have had a few in the house too. Crawling on the wall at eye level is my least favourite. It seems like they are so fast and leggy that they might jump over onto my shoulder or something. I shudder just thinking about your house right now.
And Carrie above…silverfish and earwigs are similar but not the same thing. We have earwigs all over the place here, but silverfish are more rare here. Earwigs love to be in damp places like our kitchen wash clothes, the dishwasher, the shower and our pool towels. We even had some crawl into the drain holes in our baby’s life jacket and pinch her when she was walking around last summer. Such horrible creatures. I can’t stand bugs.
Good luck with the lint. You need it.
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What is it with bugs in the bathroom. I’ll find a random spider every now and again. Tres bizarre and yes call the exterminator fast before the “lint” overtakes you.
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Good grief, woman! My skin is going to be crawling for the rest of the day!
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They really ARE smarter than we are!
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Uuuuuuugh NO. Not in the bed. No no no.
And Centipedes? How weird is THAT?
Yuck! Bugs in the house are no fun!
I am literally rolling on the floor. I think it’s more because I KNOW your “sing song” voice and can actually hear it in my head. So sorry to laugh at ya, but it must be done.
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Um. I knew I SHOULD NOT click on that link. But I did it anyway. Why, oh why, did I do it anyway? If I saw one of those in my house I would scream. I might start wearing one of those bio suits they wear in dangerous labs to sleep in. I hope that you get rid of them soon!
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Would have called after I saw the first one. Yuck.
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okay I totally have the heebie jeebies now, I hate when I find lint in the basement-geez, my room is down there now. *shudders*
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Wow, that sounds pesky. Centipedes are predators; they are often fast, aggressive, and nasty biters. We have inch-long red ones in the compost pile. They’re useful there, but I sure don’t spread mulch with my bare hands!
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we call these the fear factor bugs. eeeeew! good read lint mama! cute.
earthmama
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Jennifer-
I was PETRIFIED of bugs in my bed when I was little. Especially ticks. I remember being too scared to go to sleep. I finally begged to sleep with the light on. And I would totally cram the sheets as tightly under me as I could so that in the event there WAS a bug, it wouldn’t be able to crawl under the sheet because it was so tight against my chin and body. I SO get Carson’s fear. Ew.
Yeah, definitely call the exterminator. You’ll breathe easier.
PS – did you get my changed URL message???
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you lost me at “centipede.”
ewwww, gag, feh, yuck, shudder!
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Nothing gets by kids. Absolutely nothing.
Oh man, how could you even touch it!?
We had that problem in ournew house, only with EAR WIGS! GAG!
I am still scared in the shower.
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I am NOT laughing – I swear!
SHUDDER!!! To the 9th degree. I’ll take a spider (shudder) over a centipede, er, I mean LINT.
nth. I meant nth. Siiiigh.
Ewwww! I hate things with too many legs. Lately we’ve had spiders. Spiders have too many legs also. I had the exterminator out today. Spiders give me heebie jeebies.
I won’t say that I’m *scared* of centipedes, but I sure as hell won’t touch them with my bare hands. That being said, I see MAYBE one of those creatures every few MONTHS… how the heck do you have so many?
I’ve awakened thinking there were creepy crawlies in my bed when I was younger… and I swear I could FEEL them crawling on me. The imagination of kids is amazing.
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Yuck! Yuck! Did I mention yuck?
Hey, at least Carson’s nightmares make sense though.
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really wishing i hadn’t clicked on the centipede link
we get silverfish, which i thought were horrible… until i clicked on your link.
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*shudder* When we first moved into our house we would find at least one centipede every night and god knows how many earwigs! AGH! We sprayed outside and it definitely decreased the intrusions, but this year I think I’m going to have hubby spray the sill plates in the basement too. I don’t get creeped out easily, but man, those things are icky and were giving ME nightmares! Down with lint!!
I’ve only had one encounter with the house centipede. You know sitting on the toilet minding my own business and there it was. I about died. It ran off before I came back with a camera. And I never saw it again. Smart call on the exterminator. Indoor bugs are not cool.
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We don’t have centipedes in India – but we have every other type of bug…. and my girls squeal in disgust and irritation every-single-day.
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Dear lord, I wish I hadn’t clicked that link to look at the centipede. If I were living with those, I would have the exterminator on speed dial.
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Ewwwwwwwwwwwwwwwwwwwwwwwwwwww
wwwwwwwwwwwwwwwwwwwwwwwwwwww
wwwwwwwwwwwwwwwwwwwwwwwwww
www
but oh so funny LOL
as long as it’s not happening to me.
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I’ve been there, too. So, so gross.
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