It’s so hard to even begin to write about an experience such as BlogHer, particularly when there is so much being written about icky things that happened at the conference in relation to swag hoarding, swag mania, and pushy women inappropriately interacting with the PR folks. I certainly don’t want to further highlight bad behavior, because I HATE giving credence to to those that crap all over the rest of us that were NICE and either looking to make business/money-making connections or to simply hang out with friends. On the flip side, NOT mentioning the bad things seems sort of like non-disclosure or like I’m completely ignoring the ENORMOUS elephant in the room wearing a pink boa and Crocs, donning a bTrendie bag stuffed with e.l.f cosmetics and Tide samples, and holding an ever-buzzing vibrator.
So there was some very unsavory behavior by a small number of women who attended the conference. I’ve mentioned it and now I’m moving on because I’m not allowing a few rabid attendees to rain on my personal post-celebratory BlogHer parade.
I hope that for those of you who haven’t yet attended BlogHer and are considering attending in the future won’t let the negative things you hear about the conference sway your decision. It must be said that BlogHer is what YOU make of it and choose to take away from it.
Done.
Now I have a kind of embarrassing confession to make about LAST year’s conference. (I swear this totally relates to this year’s experience, so just hang with me for a second.) Last year I was either 1) delusional or 2) cocky and I kinda sorta inflated my “importance” as a blogger and was pretty sure most people would know me that the entire conference would be spent fending off my fans and having to deal with squeeing upon sight. Of me. Which, wow. I, uh, can’t believe I’m confessing this.
I just thought more people would know who I was and when I met people who didn’t know me, it felt weird and shamefully unexpected. There was that awkward silence after introductions and unless the other person was an ace conversationalist, there really wasn’t a conversation at all because I was unprepared for giving my spiel about my blog and most times I failed to remember to ask about their blog. I walked away from that conference unsure of myself, wondering why I continue to blog. I walked away from that conference humbled. It wasn’t that I didn’t meet great people or have fun! I did! It was just that my expectations were WAY off and that is what marred my experience.
To continue with my embarrassing confessions, last year I didn’t really understand that it was okay to miss some sessions. I mean, I PAID, I paid LOTS of money to attend, I HAD to attend the sessions, right?? Being studious and thirsty for knowledge meant that I missed out on lots of the behind the scenes stuff that went on.
This year was completely different and it was all because of my more realistic expectations of what to expect. Instead of expecting people to know who I was, I fully expected most people to NOT know me. Instead of focusing on me!, me!, me!, I went to the conference with the mantra, “don’t forget to ask them about themselves or their blog!” Instead of attending every session, I didn’t.
I got out of BlogHer what I put into it, I know I already mentioned that point, but it’s so important that it bears repeating. What I wanted out of the conference was to hang out with my friends and to make some new ones. Simple. And I’m so glad I allowed myself to do just that, rather than being a wallflower or worrying that people wouldn’t (or would) know who I was. Had my goal been to learn a ton about blogging, I would have been able to do that because the sessions were fabulous (or so I heard from many different people). If my goal was to make some contacts with PR people, I could have done that. All I would have had to do was try.
My experience started with a drive to Cincinnati to meet up with Shannan, Amy, Lu, and Andi to drive to Chicago sponsored by GM in a Chevy Traverse. A road trip with four friends was pretty much, um, awesome. Once in Chicago, and after getting lost, no thanks to Jane, Shannan’s GPS, or OnStar (darn tall building blocking satellite reception!), we ate at Dick’s Last Resort. Anyplace that hands out highly inappropriate hats and serves Big Ass beer is my kind of place. We proceeded to get lost again on the way to the Hyatt and the Social Luxe party, but whatevs, we eventually made it and scored some pretty fabulous swag (KODAK VIDEO CAMERA
That night I helped host the People’s Party with Megan, Alli, Katie, Janet, and Jenny. (For those of you who helped stuff swag bags, THANK YOU, our party may have never actually started without your help. A single line in a blog post is not nearly enough of a thank you, so I hope that twoish lines will convey my appreciation.) I was so tired after the party, I stopped by the Room 704 party for just a few minutes. Luckily in those precious few minutes, I “got” to see a naked woman walk through the lobby, so that was, interesting.
The rest of the days were a blur. There was a session or two that I attended, the community keynote, which was utterly awe-inspiring. I attended the Nikon party and Mamapoprocks! and may have drank one or twenty seven alcoholic beverages. There was lots of giggling and very serious conversations (note the sarcasm), many a photo was taken, but not with my camera because I, welllllll, I don’t actually know why. I got to eat some great food, drink THE BEST glass of orange juice of my life, see the Budweiser Clydesdales, and fall over dead at the “sale prices” at Nordstroms on Michigan Avenue. Eventually at some point I completely lost my ability to stay awake.
I didn’t get to meet every person I meant to meet, but with merely 3-4 days and 1500 people, meeting everyone was impossible. I didn’t make it to every party I wanted to attend, but sleep did win out eventually. I didn’t get to talk long enough with too many people, but the time! There was not nearly enough time! I didn’t get to see as much of Chicago as I’d have liked, but again there just wasn’t enough time.
What I did get to do was to hang out with some really great people and make some new friends. I spent time with people who made me laugh until my stomach hurt, people who made me think, people who were beautiful, and people with whom I consider my dearest friends.
(Photo credit: Shannan from Mommybits)
Did I mention that I got out of BlogHer what I put into it? Good.
Deb
July 28, 2009 at 9:07 pm
Perfect post! Best ending line ever. Congratulations on a terrific party. I’m sooo glad I finally have met you.
slynnro
July 28, 2009 at 9:07 pm
Great to meet you, even if it was for like two seconds.
slynnro´s last blog ..So I went to this thing in Chicago….
DesignHER Momma
Twitter: designhermomma
July 28, 2009 at 9:10 pm
I too had a fab time. Missed the neeked lady – but I’m ok with that.
One of my favorite times – catching up with you Saturday night. good food, relaxing, and you were one of the only people there that knew me! Yah!
DesignHER Momma´s last blog ..Blown Away in Chicago? It was more like a Tornado hit me.
Scary Mommy
July 28, 2009 at 9:10 pm
This year was such a learning experience for me. My expectations were way off, and I can’t wait for next year to do it the right way! So glad to finally put your beautiful self to your blog.
Scary Mommy´s last blog ..BlogHer High
Margaret (Nanny Goats)
July 28, 2009 at 9:40 pm
I, too, am glad I got to at LEAST say hello to you, for 2 seconds. Which, by the way, is the secret to meeting 1500 people in one weekend. In case you were wondering.
Margaret (Nanny Goats)´s last blog ..Chivalrouslessness in Thieves. And that Rachel Ray Giveaway.
Trishy
July 28, 2009 at 9:44 pm
SOOO Glad you had such a fab time! Your pictures are adorable!!
Jen
Twitter: jayesel
July 28, 2009 at 10:08 pm
awesome
I can’t wait to go next year. I’ve put it off for the past few years (well, 2 yrs ago I had a newborn so that was actually a valid reason!) and every year I’m KICKING myself for not just going, already. It looks like so much freaking FUN and I need more of that in my life, dangit! If you go next year, I so want to meet you 
and I won’t pretend like I don’t know you! LOL
Jen´s last blog ..another ‘whhhaaaa! my kid is growing up!’ post
Joe @ IrrationalDad
July 28, 2009 at 10:25 pm
Jealous. I, unfortunately, don’t know any of you fab bloggers in real life. So, if I were to attend such an event (and it sounds like an awesome time), I’d end up being the dude sitting at the table all by himself, playing on my Blackberry while all kinds of fun happened around me.
Glad you had a great time!
Joe @ IrrationalDad´s last blog ..Daddy as a baby
Condo Blues
July 28, 2009 at 10:33 pm
One of the best things about the conference, even better than swag, was meeting you at the Chevy dinner and hearing you say magic words, “I know you I read your blog.”
That and someone called a wrong number in our car via OnStar. That was funny.
Condo Blues´s last blog ..EcoSmart Organic Insect Repellent Giveaway
anymommy
July 28, 2009 at 10:52 pm
Fun, you just sound like you had fun. That’s fabulous. I loved this post and I love that I got to say hi, although I would have loved to talk longer!
anymommy´s last blog ..Chi-ca-go
mep
July 28, 2009 at 11:00 pm
This year’s BlogHer was my first. I’m still working on my post about it all, but basically my expectations were just to enjoy a fun, child-free weekend with old and new friends and just see what it was all about. I had a great time, though I was more in stand-back-and-take-it-in mode than party-like-a-rock-star mode. I’m cool with that though.
I did spot you a couple of times (your hair looked fantastic), but I am a little shy about introducing myself. Sorry.
Great photographs, as always.
mep´s last blog ..A Date with Drake?
Megan {Velveteen Mind}
Twitter: velveteenmind
July 28, 2009 at 11:02 pm
Blah blah blah great post. I’m just going to copy and paste half of it into my own blog. Now then, business out of the way… holy hell those are really good pictures of you!
Love, Megan
(seriously, possibly my shortest comment ever)
Megan {Velveteen Mind}´s last blog ..End of Days
VDog
Twitter: VDog
July 29, 2009 at 12:26 am
Great post, dahlin.
Next year? We should TOTES take a whole week off for BlogHer so we can do and see it all.
VDog´s last blog ..Boozeday – Apple and Spice
Twenty Four At Heart
July 29, 2009 at 12:26 am
I’m glad we had a chance to meet even if it was brief. It was my first BlogHer and I was exhausted from trying to do everything. Next year I’ll pick and choose a little more carefully! It was a great experience.
Twenty Four At Heart´s last blog ..Snippets
the planet of janet
Twitter: planetofjanet
July 29, 2009 at 12:58 am
so. blogher 2010.
i hope.
the planet of janet´s last blog ..My blogging natal day!
Kara
July 29, 2009 at 7:24 am
Great post.
Rayne of Terror
July 29, 2009 at 7:54 am
I went fully expecting that no one would know me, even though I’ve been reading and commenting on some 200 blogs for 5 years, and was completely shocked when “big” blogger like Ask Moxie and Uncommon Julia and Melissa Ford DID recognize my name. And at the book signing when Kate Harding (KATE HARDING! SO BRILLIANT!) remembered my name and was grateful I’d come to get a book signed, I just about keeled over in a swoon.
I wish I had been able to do more and stay longer, but this 35 week pregnant body reached its limit before my brain did.
Rayne of Terror´s last blog ..34 weeks
Shelly
Twitter: shelly_overlook
July 29, 2009 at 7:58 am
Can’t believe we didn’t have our pic taken. Damn. There just was not enough time. Next year??
Shelly´s last blog ..Wow.
rachel-asouthernfairytale
July 29, 2009 at 8:04 am
Love, Love, Love this!
Damn, those are fabulous pics of you sweetie!
How did I not get a pic with you? argh.
Don Mills Diva
July 29, 2009 at 8:34 am
I wish we had a chance to hang out a little more – your blog is definitely one of my favs…
Don Mills Diva´s last blog ..So maybe I’m not such a Diva after all…
lceel
July 29, 2009 at 8:47 am
I felt so stupid after I said, “I know you”. I am so glad I had a chance to meet you. You are truly a lovely person – and not bad looking, either.
lceel´s last blog ..Wordless Wednesday – The Ladies
Headless Mom
Twitter: HeadlessMom
July 29, 2009 at 11:15 am
Well done. It pays to know what you want and do exactly that!
Headless Mom´s last blog ..Thanks BlogHer 09!
Burgh Baby
July 29, 2009 at 11:33 am
Stop making me want to go, dammit.
Burgh Baby´s last blog ..This. This is Why I Plan to Lock Her in the Basement for the Next Twenty Years.
Miss
July 29, 2009 at 11:38 am
Meeting you was a long time coming. I’m so so so happy I got to!! Like, holy crap its you! Totally awesome moment for me.
Miss´s last blog ..The One About the Conference That Wasn’t
Leslie
Twitter: mymommysplace
July 29, 2009 at 12:17 pm
I absolutely agree – you get out of BlogHer what you put into it. I learned SO MUCH, including how to do it better next time.
I’m so glad I had the chance to meet you. You are absolutely delightful!
Leslie´s last blog ..Who Says Bloggers Aren’t Real Writers?
Heather, Queen of Shake Shake
July 29, 2009 at 12:32 pm
Ok, so I wasn’t really that jealous of not going until I saw your hat. Damn it!
Also, you should dye your head red.
Heather, Queen of Shake Shake´s last blog ..Love, Undefined.
Colleen - Mommy Always Wins
July 29, 2009 at 12:38 pm
A-tothefreakin-men!
Was so lovely to see you again!!!
Colleen – Mommy Always Wins´s last blog ..A REAL BlogHer post (and then that’s all…I swear…I mean, maybe)
Laura McIntyre
July 29, 2009 at 12:52 pm
It looks awesome , i imagine just getting the break away from kiddies is fun enough but add in all the rest would be the icing on the cake
melissa
Twitter: rockdrool
July 29, 2009 at 1:10 pm
i loved it…even though i didn’t get to meet you:( and you’re right. you get out what you put in. and it was so incredible!!
sam {temptingmama}
Twitter: temptingmama
July 29, 2009 at 1:16 pm
I’m going to do better next time.
I think I was a little shy about interrupting conversations to say hi but now I know that if you don’t cease the opportunity you may not have it again all weekend. Because of that there are so many people that I didn’t get to see.
But you!? OMG I am so glad that we had a little more time to hang out and actually talk. You’re amazing, adorable and I want to put you in my pocket and bring you to Canada forever!
*hugs*
sam {temptingmama}´s last blog ..Failed
Aimee Greeblemonkey
July 29, 2009 at 2:45 pm
Have I mentioned lately that I love you?
amy2boys
Twitter: amy2boys
July 29, 2009 at 3:57 pm
Cute pics! I like your recap – and your advice, which I’m totally taking for next year.
amy2boys´s last blog ..Are You Ready For Some Football?
Tiffany
July 30, 2009 at 12:01 am
Hi Jennifer. This is my first time commenting but I have been reading your blog for quite some time. First off I’m glad you had a good time and I’m very jealous. But the reason I’m finally commenting is to ask first where you got the shirt you’re wearing in the picture with the funny hats, and second if I can print out the last picture to show my hair stylist. I have wanted my bangs like yours forever and apparently I’m just not describing them right because so far no one’s cut them right. Just thought I’d ask first because I wouldn’t want someone just taking my pictures.
Thanks,
T.
Leighann
July 30, 2009 at 9:21 am
It was so great to see you again! You are such a sweetheart.
Leighann´s last blog ..BlogHer 09: The People
Angie [A Whole Lot of Nothing]
July 30, 2009 at 8:22 pm
Totally right-on w/ the summation. It was awesome meeting you, and you’re one of the people I remember meeting! (Feel honored.)
Next year… Oh hell yes.
Angie [A Whole Lot of Nothing]´s last blog ..Can’t get much lower on the health chain
Jannie Funster
July 30, 2009 at 8:44 pm
I’m so totally going next year!!! I might even sign up NOW!
Jannie Funster´s last blog ..Lazy River Sunday (Formerly Titled “Frisky Jim at the Water Park”)
Leighann
July 30, 2009 at 8:48 pm
How was the Traverse? Did you like it? We are looking into getting a three seater. Thoughts?
Leighann´s last blog ..Tissue Expanders 101
Jennifer
Twitter: playgroupie
July 30, 2009 at 9:25 pm
Leighann, the Traverse was great. It was a bit small for 5 adult women with all our luggage! It rode really nicely, had 2 sunroofs, a navigation system…
It’s about the same size as my Honda Pilot, so I think it would work pretty well for a 2 kid family. Anymore kids than that, it would be a bit tight.
Karen Sugarpants
July 31, 2009 at 10:22 am
dammit. sam said what i wanted to say about meeting you, because she is a twat.
i love you madly.
Karen Sugarpants´s last blog ..My Mighty BlogHer Recap, With Canadian On Top
maggie, dammit
July 31, 2009 at 2:44 pm
SO GOOD to meet you!
maggie, dammit´s last blog ..I’ve looked at life from both sides now
Stephanie
Twitter: Stephanie Sheaffer
July 31, 2009 at 10:49 pm
Hi Jennifer! I totally agree with you that “BlogHer is what YOU make of it.” And it sounds like you made it wonderful.
I have to admit I was slightly disappointed when I heard the announcement that BlogHer 2010 will be in NYC. I’m sure it will be a huge success there, but that’s a long trek from Arizona.
I’m hoping for a west coast venue for 2011…
Stephanie´s last blog ..“hand me my notepad…I thought up another way to change the world”
the new girl
August 1, 2009 at 8:07 pm
You were TOTALLY on my list of people with whom I wished I could have spoken for more than 3 seconds. It was great to meet you, though, and you are lovely.
the new girl´s last blog ..You Tell Me: Grad School Vandal Or Literary Genius?
jen
August 1, 2009 at 10:04 pm
definitely the best blogher experience that i’ve read thus far. thanks for sharing.
jen´s last blog ..i {heart} faces … at the beach …
MommyNamedApril
Twitter: MommyNamedApril
August 2, 2009 at 2:12 pm
*jealous*
MommyNamedApril´s last blog ..Sunday Citar
Michelle
August 3, 2009 at 12:37 am
Looks like a blast!
Michelle´s last blog ..Colorado Here We Come
Amo
August 3, 2009 at 6:38 am
I have to admit, I was honored when you called me and wanted to see eachother! Thanks for making me go to the keynote.
I was so overwhelmed with it all, to be quite honest. I was in a ‘my husband spent a ton of money on me and I’m suppost to be learning something at all these sessions, but the people I really want to meet and hang out with ARE NOT in the sessions!!!urgh!’
But my post is very positive, because I did have a good time.
Amo´s last blog ..My BlogHer Recap. (No, you didn’t miss a thing. *Ahem*)
Lee of MWOB
August 4, 2009 at 12:31 am
Great post and thanks for the insight into your BlogHer brain from last year. I KNEW there were benefits from being basically unknown and I reaped them this year. I went with no expectations about people knowing me or what I should do…and the whole experience for me just ruled. Learned a little, met cool peeps, partied a lot! but most of all …. I was inspired. And that inspiration was all I could have asked for….
Next year though?: I want to meet you.
Lee of MWOB´s last blog ..BlogHer ‘09: The Top 10 Things I Learned as a First Time Attendee
Trenches of Mommyhood
Twitter: sarahviz
August 4, 2009 at 11:18 am
This is why I can’t wait to meet you someday.
Trenches of Mommyhood´s last blog ..Sarah’s Summer Faves
Anna See
August 6, 2009 at 9:36 pm
this helped me understand blogher a lot better. still not sure if it’the place for me, but connecting with other women and meeting blog friends face to face sounds great.
Anna See´s last blog ..If You’re Under 35, I Apologize for This One