My son, the teenager. Or man. Not sure there’s really a difference.

Both kids were safely buckled into their seats as we drove away from Carson’s preschool.

“So!  How was your day, Carson?”  I asked, as I ask everyday when I pick  him up from school.  I already knew the answer.

With major huffing and puffing, Carson replied, “I don’t want to talk about it!  Stop asking!”

This has become his standard reply.  Occasionally I’ll get a noncommittal affirmation that he had a good day or that he played with his best friend, Mary Grace, “on the monkey bars,” like,  DUH MOM.   At first I was concerned and would press for further details.  “Did something happen?!” I’d ask, being careful not to say,”‘did anything BAD happen,” fearing that I’d give him the idea that if something had indeed happened, that it was somehow bad and that he’d possibly become the school hating Carson from the years before.

Though I’m not certain, I’m pretty sure nothing has happened, in fact I think he really loves school.  He’s just choosing to be noncommunicative, like a teenager or man.  (I’m not sure there’s really a difference.)  Carson would just rather not talk about his day at school and it annoys him beyond belief that I’d ask, day after day.

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When Tate and I first met, he used to spend an inordinate amount of time quoting movies.  I think it’s a standard mating ritual for males, trying to show their potential mate their incredible comic and memorization abilities.

I heard lines from Caddyshack, Fletch, and Spies Like Us nearly as often as I heard, “hey baby, wanna make out!?”

“One mocks what one does not understand,” was AND STILL IS (help me) one of Tate’s most favorite movie quotes.  (Spies Like Us.)

Lucky for me (not), Carson has started quoting movies and expects great laughs each time.

“How about some delicious, hot schmoes!  [dramatic pause] They’re s’mores, Buzz,” he’ll say, looking expectantly at me, hoping I’ll be as impressed as he is with himself. (Toy Story 2)

If that one doesn’t get the laughs he was expecting, he moves onto the movie Cars.  “GOOD-BYE!! Okay, I’m good,” and on cue I laugh and laugh, heartily and artificially.

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So let me see if I understand.  The only way I’m going to get Carson to communicate with me for the next twenty or so  years is through movie quotes?

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