Category Archives: meme

Where I’m from

I am from hand-me-down couches,
from newsprint on Silly Putty and a dusty bottle of brandy-colored Chanel No. 5.
I am from dog hair covered rugs where Virginia Slim smoke hung heavy in air, held in place by the dim, lamp light.
I am from the tall pine tree whose sappy branches we climbed, from spiky evergreen bushes, their needles stuck in my bare feet.

I am from opening one gift on Christmas Eve and hot tempers with quick fuses and red flashes,
from Jacqueline Lane and Georgia Emma and Vicki Ann.
I am from the never forgets and the rarely forgives.
From life isn’t fair and he doesn’t know what he’s missing.

I am from kneelers and holy water, RCIA and catechism,
from baptism, first communions and reconciliations, with more questions than answers

I’m from the flat Kansas plains, from Southern plantation owners who became poor Southern sharecroppers, I’m from Denmark and Scotland.
I’m from sugary, tart cranberry ice and pink salad with canned cherry pie filling,
from Coors with pull tabs and two olive martinis
From the man who sold vacuum cleaners in the dust bowl, the burned hands in Vietnam, and the arthritic hands showing me here’s the church, here’s the steeple

I am from cedar chests filled with locks of hair in envelopes, 4th grade report cards, and macaroni and Elmer’s glue artwork.  The pack rat’s proof of worth, memories of smiles in photographic form.

(Found this via Stephanie at Adventures in Babywearing.  I loved hers so much that I decided to write my own.  I hope you’ll play along, too.  The template to make your own can be found here.)

Out of the Mouth of Babes

Braden wants to know 8 things about me, Ella. 

My really pretty Mommy talks way more about my brother, Carson, which is so completely unfair.  So here’s about 20 posts worth of super exciting tidbits about me.

Ella! 

1.  I’m in lurve (see how I know how to use the bloggy lingo!) with my thumb. 

2.  Just within the past few days, I’ve finally learned how to sit up and roll around the room.  My lovely Mommy thinks it’s great and is feeling a great sense of relief now that I’m coming out of my blobdem.

3.  I could watch my brother Carson all day long.  He’s so funny and entertaining.  I hardly cry when he snatches my thumb out of my mouth or drops Thomas on my head or pokes my eye.

4.  My favorite foods are booby milk, peas, green beans, squash, mixed vegetables, carrots, pears, applesauce, prunes, bananas, apricots, sweet potatoes, rice cereal, and oatmeal.  I don’t like avocado.

5.  I have the cutest hat in the whole, entire world…see…


My talented and charming Mommy wishes she had one, too.

6.  Lately I’ve been sleeping all night.  Naps are overrated in my opinion since I might miss something fun that my awesome and hilarious Mommy and Carson are doing. 

7.  Whoever invented the game “Patty Cake” should be awarded the Congressional Medal of Honor or an Oscar or something.  I’d play that all day if my gorgeous Mommy would let me.

8.   I’m supposed to tag 8 people, but my smart and sassy Mommy says, “no,”  unless you’d like to play along, that is. Instead of tagging, I’ll give you one more picture of me looking cute.

Extreme Haiku Kitchen Edition

Haiku Friday

Lights in my kitchen
Tate put them up, he’s so proud
Praise Tate! I can see!

My nice, neat pantry
There’s a place for everything
Don’t mess it up, please!

Bottom pantry shelf
Looking at it gives me hives
Hell has broken loose

Here resides my brain
Appointments, birthdays, phone calls
My calendar pal

African Violets
One alive, one dead, that’s odd
I should just pitch it

I don’t kill all plants
My bamboo plant is awesome
Good luck in Bama

Look!! Pretty, black stove!!
Got you for $200 bucks
I love a bargain!

Damn kitchen counters
Always messy, full of crap
This gives me hives, too

Hmmm, see the fryer?
This could explain my big ass
But I like fried food

Doodaddy tagged me for this 8 things about my kitchen meme…this was merely a break from my meme hiatus, which resumes……Now.

Update…Phoenix also tagged me for an 8 things about me meme, so BOO-YA! Three birds with one stone!

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To play along for Haiku Friday, follow these steps:

1. Write your own haiku on your blog. You can do one or many, all following a theme or just random. What’s a haiku, you ask? Click here.

2. Sign the Mister Linky below with your name and the link to your haiku post (the specific post URL, not your generic blog URL). We will delete your link if it doesn’t go to a haiku. If you need help with this, contact Jennifer or myself.

3. Pick up a Haiku Friday button to display on the post or in your sidebar by clicking the button above.

May the Meme R.I.P

I’m taking a hiatus from doing memes for awhile, but for one last hurrah, I’m doing this 5 things meme.

Auburn Gal Always tagged me for this one and since she’s one of my blogging bff’s, I wanted to end with hers…

5 things I want to do before I die:
1. Go to Hawaii and stay in a private bungalow, complete with butler, right on the beach
2. See my children’s’ children
3. Have thin thighs, either by exercise and diet or surgical removal of the lard firmly attached to my ass
4. Take a cooking class, preferably a private lesson with Alton Brown
5. Learn how to take a decent photograph

5 things I can do:
1. Belch like a man, you’re impressed, I’m sure. (You should be.)
2. Pick up things off the floor with my toes. Very handy when you have an infant who always seems to be nursing.
3. Poop in front of an entourage. Again, you’re impressed. Yadda yadda yadda.
4. French braid my own hair. Too bad it’s not 1982. It’s a worthless skill in 2007.
5. Sing the lyrics to most songs. Not well, though, the sound of my voice can be equated to the sound of a very ill peacock.

5 things I cannot do:
1. Run a 5K, but just you wait.
2. Use a brush to blow dry the hair in the back of my head.
3. Make a stollen the way my MIL can.
4. Watch movies where something bad happens to animals.
5. Eat raw onions. I also feel that nobody should eat raw onions. Not only are they disgusting, they make you stink. I’m calling my congressman about this very issue.

5 things that make a man attractive to me:
1. Sense of humor
2. Attention to the little details
3. Ability to fix things
4. Devotion to children
5. A large penis (Come on ladies, I’m NOT the only one.)

5 celebrities that I crush on:
1. David Beckham
2. Josh Duhamel
3. Alton Brown
4. Patrick Dempsey
5. George Clooney

This now concludes (for the time being) my relationship with the meme.

R.I.P.

RaNdOm FaCtS AbOUt MoI

Worker Mommy from Because I Must Blog, tagged me for the 7 random facts meme.

I could refer you all to my list of 100 Spine-tingling Facts about me and instruct you to only read numbers 1-7 or 7-14 or 65-71, but that’s too much clicking for you, my gentle readers, I don’t want to cause any undue stress. So that’s out.

I could just type “I’m bat shit crazy” seven times. But that would be, uh, bat shit crazy. So that’s out.

Instead, I came up with these gems about Tate and I since we’ll be celebrating our six year wedding anniversary on Saturday.

1. I was hoping to get in on some making out action the first night I hung out with Tate. Instead we watched Sportscenter. Either I’m a hussy or he’s a gentleman.

2. We met at a wedding. He was an usher, I was a bridesmaid.

3. I approached him at the beer table. Where else?!

4. I have every email, except for one, that he’s ever sent me.

5. After a date early in our relationship, I puked from drinking too much and caught it with my own hands. He still liked me after that.

6. All of our first pictures together are the kind where you take a picture of yourself. We didn’t know anyone else in Knoxville to take pictures of us.

7. The first time we did it, it was scary. In fact it hasn’t gotten any less scary since that first time. Get your mind out of the gutter, sheesh! “It” refers to buying a house. We’ve bought 3 homes in our 6 year marriage.

My tagging days are over. Too much copying and pasting and clicking. It wears a girl out. So if you want to play, gofer it.

Old Women and Restaurants in Memes, Oh My!

Michele at I Got Two, Babe must be crazy.

She thinks I’m going to age! Ha!

I’ll be 29 forevah!

Oh wait, you all know that I’m 32. Shit.

So here’s a meme about me as an Old Woman.

When I am an Old Woman I hope to:

Travel. Travel to places with white sand beaches, crystal blue waters, and pina coladas. Travel to Ireland. Travel to Australia. Travel to Canada.

Have season ticket box seats to St. Louis Cardinals games.

Live close to my children and grandchildren.

Be healthy and fit. And beautiful (even with wrinkles and flab). And a breast lift.

Finally have read the classics instead of just having skimmed the Cliff Notes.

Volunteer my time to worthy causes for women and children.

Have a housekeeper and personal chef.

When I am an old woman I will not:

Be on a low-carb diet.

Offer assvice to those younger than me if they haven’t asked for it.

Own an RV. Or a Buick.

Guilt my children.

Become Old Lady Playgroupie to the neighbor kids.

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Jean at Working Momma 24/7 has me figured out.

I love to eat. I especially love to eat out.

She tagged me for a restaurant meme.

Here are the rules:
1. Link to name of person that tagged you.
2. Include state and country you live in.
3. List top 5 favorite local restaurants.
4. Tag 5 other people and let them know they’ve been tagged.

Lower Alabama, US of A

I can’t do just local, as in Alabama local. I’d be remiss in not mentioning some of my favorite local haunts in my former residences.

Watch out, I’m a rule breaker!

1. Mexican Villa, Springfield, MO. You haven’t lived until you’ve had the Burrito Enchilada Style. Sure, those around you will be cursing you for the odors you’ll emit, but I swear it’s so worth it.

2. Trailhead Brewery, St. Charles, MO. I wish I could eat their chicken nachos everyday. So delicious, with multi-colored chips (which all taste the same, but they seem better than uni-color chips), beans, smoked chicken, cheese, black olives, and jalapenos. Oh and the beer! How could I not mention the beer first! I’m sorry, beer, you know I love you.

3. Calhoun’s. Knoxville, TN. Great ribs, spectacular Spinach Maria, and beer. A great place to go before University of TN football games.

4. Krekel’s, Decatur, IL. This place is a dive! Greasy burgers, fries, and milkshakes! No wonder I gained so much weight when we first moved to Decatur!

5. Big Ed’s Pizza, Oak Ridge, TN. The best pizza in the entire world. ENTIRE WORLD. I’m not even kidding.

The dilemma is now on who to tag. I know several of you are suffering from over-tagging, others of you covet the tag. I don’t know who does and doesn’t wish to be tagged so…

Here’s who I tag:

1. You
2. You
3. You
4. You
5. You (you didn’t think I’d forget you now did you!?!)

Tagalaga Ding Dong

Instructions: Remove the blog from the top, move all blogs up one, add yourself to the bottom.

Families are like fudge
A Beautiful Life
Absolutely Bananas
Smiling Mom (thanks for the tag!)
Playgroups Are No Place For Children

What were you doing 10 years ago?

I had just graduated with my undergrad degree from Southwest Missouri State University. That fall I was to start graduate school in Speech-Language Pathology. I’d just moved into my very own apartment all by myself. I lusted after a hot guy named Craig (give me a moment while I reflect, mmmm). For money, I worked at Ruby Tuesday as a hostess. I loved my 1991 black Mitsubishi Eclipse. Most evenings I could be found at Jordan Creek, Harpo’s, or any other fine establishment that served beer.

Five Snacks You Enjoy

1. Salt and Vinegar Chips
2. Tortilla Chips and Salsa
3. Pizza Combos (but not the ones with pretzels, those are yucky)
4. Cookies and Cream Ice Cream
5. Cheese and Crackers

Five Songs That You Know All The Lyrics To:

1. Hit Me Baby One More Time by Britney Spears (shut up, you know them, too)
2. Greased Lightening by John Travolta (actually I know all the words to all the Grease songs)
3. Lookin’ For Love by Johnny Lee (from the movie Urban Cowboy. Hey, I used to have a thing for John Travolta)
4. Dancing Queen by Abba
5. Fade to Black by Metallica

Five Things You Would Do If You Were a Millionaire:

1. Pay off my Honda Pilot and my house
2. Invest in my kids 529 plans
3. Invest in our retirement accounts
4. Go to Hawaii
5. Hire a personal shopper (maybe Stacy and Clinton)

Five bad habits:

1. Blogging and all related blogging activities too much
2. Not exercising
3. Not keeping up with the checkbook and the mountains of receipts I always need to record
4. Biting my inner cheek when I’m nervous
5. Yelling at my dogs

Five Things You Like To Do:

1. Blog and all blogging related activities
2. Go out to dinner at non-chain restaurants
3. Watch great TV shows (unlike the series finale of “The Sopranos”)
4. Relax on the beach or in our boat on the lake
5. Drink a beer or two

Five Things You Would Never Wear Again:

1. Leg Warmers
2. A perm
3. Very high-waisted pants
4. Cropped shirts
5. A cowboy belt with my name stamped into it (but it was super cool in 1981)

Five Favorite Toys

1. The laptop
2. I don’t have any other toys (unless you count bedroom toys and I don’t have any favorites of those)

Five People to Tag

Jamie at Random Buzzin’
Shelly at Scenic Overlook
Christine at Watch Me! No, Watch me!
Melanie at I’m Really Too Boring For a Blog
Kim at Everyone Else is Doing It