Playgroups are No Place for Children

The Fortuitous Finding of Wheel of Fortune

Written on November 26, 2012 by Jennifer in Extended Fam, Hallmark, Pictures

It all started with my kids first ever episode of Wheel of Fortune. Wheel! of! Fortune!

It’s our family’s tradition. Every year I search the TV listings to find all of our favorite holiday shows. Frosty the Snowman kicked off this season and while we were waiting in front of the fire, with hot chocolate in hand for it to start (another part of our yearly tradition), we watched Wheel of Fortune.

Carson and Ella were enthralled!

“You mean, there’s a game on TV where you guess letters and WIN REAL MONEY?!?”

In between wowing them with my unbelievable puzzle solving skills (“How did you KNOW that, Mom!!!”), I told them about my summers as a kid where I’d go spend at week at my aunt and uncle’s house in Oklahoma City. Part of the tradition of my visits was to watch Wheel of Fortune every night after dinner and then take their dog, Vanna (yes, really), for a walk up the street to get frozen yogurt.

Carson has mentioned before that he thinks it would be awesome if we lived closer to family. Both kids would love to be able to spend a week during the summer at Uncle James and Aunt Melissa’s house, watching Wheel of Fortune and eating frozen yogurt. We’d love if someday their cousin, Riley, could come visit us for a week in the summer. For now, though, we live too far away and they’re still a bit too young for that to happen.

I worry a lot about my kids feeling like our extended family members are strangers and vice versa. It takes a lot of effort, but as often as we can, we drive the 500 miles to visit. We try to FaceTime every weekend. On holidays even when we can’t be there, we talk about Aunt Kate and Nanny and Papa and Nana and Paw Paw and James, Melissa, and Riley.

But it’s not the same as living close by.

I went up to the attic to search for my old Wheel of Fortune board game. I could picture it stowed away in one of many plastic totes, saved from elementary school days and later used during speech and language therapy sessions with my students. After searching a few totes, I finally found it, but underneath it, I found a true treasure.

I found this:

It’s a birthday card from my Papa, sent to me sometime around 1991 I’m guessing since the stamps were 29 cents. It’s a first generation (probably?) recordable Hallmark card. The battery is dead, but I remember that the message said something like, “Happy birthday Jenny! Sorry we won’t be there, but we’ll see you Easter.”

He passed away several years ago, so I haven’t heard his voice in years. Even though the card isn’t actually working, the memory of his voice came back to me. I can remember exactly the way his voice hesitated during the message and how as soon as I heard it, I knew it was something I’d save forever.

Now I just need to find a battery….

A few weeks ago, Hallmark sent me an “Until We Hug Again” recordable bunny. It’s been sitting on a shelf for the past few weeks while I tried to figure out exactly what I would do with it and who would be the lucky recipient, but after finding Papa’s card, I know exactly who’s getting her.

I’m going to have Ella and Carson record a message for their cousin, Riley. We’re going to tell her how much we love her and wish that we could see her everyday.

We want her to know us, even if we’re 500 miles away.

I’m really glad we stumbled upon Wheel of Fortune the other night.

A HUGE thank you to Hallmark for inviting me to be a part of their Life is a Special Occasion campaign this year. While I am compensated for my work, all stories are original and true.

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Turtles and Bumblebees of Halloweens Past

Written on October 30, 2012 by Jennifer in Hallmark, Little Monkeys

Last Friday night, I worked a local trick-or-treating event, handing out candy. Ella and Carson came along and sat beside my booth and watched as droves of costumed children trick-or-treated along the trail.

They announced nearly every child as they approached, a kind, snark-free version of Fashion Police.

“Look! It’s Ironman!”

“I like your zombie costume!”

“Mommy! It’s Thomas! We have that costume.”

“What’s a crash test dummy?”

“Another Batman, like me, Mom!”

“Hey! That girl’s a butterfly!”

Later that night, we talked about all the costumes we saw and recalled our costumes from Halloween past. They were shocked to find out that even I used to dress up when I was a kid.

“You mean, they had Halloween all the way back then? Was that when George Washington was president?” Carson asked. Kids, man.

I told them about my angel costume and pioneer costume that my mom had sewed for me. They were really impressed that Nanny had made my costumes since I prefer the easy way out with shopping. I also told them about all the years that I dressed up as Madonna.

“What’s Madonna,” asked Ella.

I searched through old photos of them dressed up for Halloween and we spent a cold and rainy afternoon looking at all of their costumes.

Carson, only three days old on his first Halloween, didn’t really get in the holiday spirit. By his second Halloween, he was quite adorable dressed as a baby bumblebee.

Ella’s first Halloween: A Pumpkin. Carson dressed as a baseball player, but I can’t find any pictures! (Bad Mommy!)

Ella: A darling, but fierce lion. Carson: Thomas the Train.

This may have been my favorite year, when Carson and Ella dressed up as Mario and Luigi. It was also the last year that they let me choose their costumes.

Ella: Raphael, a Teenage Mutant Ninja Turtle, a costume she randomly picked, but loved with every fiber of her being. She truly embodies the ninja spirit, don’t you think? Carson: Lightning McQueen

This year’s costumes took months of planning and thought to choose. Costume catalogs arrived in the mail sometime at the end of August and both children pored over the book, dog-earing pages. Costume selection has been serious business. Ella wanted to be a horse, then she wanted to be a My Little Pony specifically, but she also wanted to be Sonic the Hedgehog. Carson waffled between the Sonic costume and Batman. Oh the agony of final decisions! In the end, Ella went with Sonic and Carson went with Batman, but not without moments of regret.

They’re already planning next Halloween’s costumes.

“Maybe you could sew us something like Nanny did when you were a kid?”

Kids, man.

Thanks so much to Hallmark for inviting me to be a part of their Life is a Special Occasion campaign this year. While I am compensated for my work, everything I write is original stories from my life.

Check out Hallmark’s adorable Scooby Doo Interactive Storybuddy and their Shadows and Shrieks witches hat door decor this Halloween season. They’re even offering a 30% discount using code BLOG30 on your order from Hallmark.com!

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Too Much

Written on October 24, 2012 by Jennifer in Little Monkeys

Nearly 6 years to the day when he finally got his first tooth, which happened to be the day after his 1st birthday, he finally lost his first tooth. It was a much anticipated event, with days of wiggling and waiting. The tooth fairy came and brought a Sacajawea coin, which according to Tate is the coolest thing ever.

Carson turns seven on Sunday. S-E-V-E-N. That is just simply not possible. Six blew my mind, but seven? Somehow he’s in first grade and reading chapter books and doing word problems and asking unbelievably insightful questions. It’s like he’s a kid, or something. It’s INSANE.

For the past several days, he’s been a little sick with a sore throat and fever. His voice is hoarse and deeper. Combined with the missing tooth and impending SEVENTH (??????!!!!!) birthday, it’s just too much.

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Dynamo

Written on October 2, 2012 by Jennifer in Pictures, Quirky Me

I hate when I get that little voice in my head that tells me that I’m not good enough. I’m pretty sure everyone has that voice sometimes, it’s just something about being human, I think.

I’m not the best writer. I’m not the most popular. I’m not the best photographer. I’m not the fastest runner. I’m not the prettiest/funniest/most organized…

Something about me: I crave being recognized for the things I do, whatever it is. Usually I’m okay with not being the best, as long as I hear, “good job.”

The past year has felt like a blur. I finally was offered paid writing jobs, I started my own business (sort of/halfway), I ran a half-marathon. Sometimes I felt like I was on fire, but most of the time I felt like all I was doing was putting out fires. I certainly wasn’t the best at anything I was doing. Especially when it came to Carson and Ella, I felt like, I don’t know, I felt like I failing them somehow.

I thought that being a working mom would be that best of both worlds thing where I was finally recognized for my work. Being a mom is absolutely one of the greatest things about my life, but it’s not something that is exactly applauded. You don’t get gold stars for getting all the laundry done or a check in the mail every time you manage to get to soccer practice on time with shoes, socks, shin guards, a soccer ball, and a water bottle.

Funny thing, though, getting those paychecks didn’t fill up that part of me that craves recognition. In these past few months, where I’ve been utterly overwhelmed and unhappy, I thought a lot about what I really want out of life and I figured out at least one thing that I’m sure of. I want to be really good at being a mom. I don’t mean that I want to be a better mom than you or the mom that you see on Pinterest who is gorgeous, takes perfect pictures of her very clean children in her immaculate home, can fashion a work of art out of recycled thrift store finds, all while preparing dinner from scratch. No.

I want to be a really good mom to Carson and Ella. To do that I had to give up a few things. I quit one of my jobs. I gave up a few responsibilities. I decided to respect my time. I decided to stop feeling like I have to apologize for not being good at everything. (Well, at least until that voice in my head starts up again. It can be a bit pesky.)

It will always be there, the craving to be recognized, especially for what I do as a mom. It’s not something that will actually happen, I know that nobody will really notice all the tiny details that go into being their mom, but I do know that focusing on my kids is exactly what I’m supposed to be doing right now.

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Summer is Where My Heart Is

Written on September 24, 2012 by Jennifer in Hallmark, Quirky Me

According to the calendar, fall officially arrived last Saturday. I guess that I like fall, with it’s pumpkins and leaves, football, soups, and cool weather. It’s just that fall also has a less glamorous side with it’s school, homework, soccer, and overtired children. Now that my children have morphed into actual school-aged kids, I find myself longing for the lazy days of summer where could sleep in and there was absolutely nothing planned except a day of swimming and firefly catching.

Right now my calendar is a bit full, to say the least.

(This is just one of my four (!!!) calendars. OY.)

Please note the red arrows, pointing to a little something at the bottom right of the calendar. It says “Destin,” and this is where I kindly thumb my nose at fall, pack up the kids in the car and head for sunny beaches. With all the stress I’ve been feeling lately, being able to see the promise of a beach vacation has kept me going.

This is what I’m looking forward to the most:

1. Sleeping In
2. Ignoring my computer
3. Forgetting that I have four calendars
4. Eating seafood platters
5. Sitting on the beach
6. Playing in the waves
7. Being lazy
8. NO HOMEWORK!
9. Spending time with my kids
10. Smelling like sand, sunscreen, and pina coladas.

Sure, fall has it’s good points, too, but summer is just where my heart is. I know summer gets a bad rap with it’s heat and humidity, and I’ve certainly done my fair share of complaining about having to entertain the kids during those long summer days, but summer has always been and will always be my favorite season.

Ella sits with Nugget, her Hallmark Interactive Story Buddy

As much as I’m going to enjoy our trip to Destin, fall will be here waiting for us when we get back. I don’t want to spend our whole vacation fretting about what’s waiting for us when we return — because that’s how my crazy brain works — so I’ve also made a list of fall things that I’m looking forward to the most:

1. Cool weather that’s perfect for running
2. Hanging out around the firepit on cool, fall evenings and roasting marshmallows
3. Soup! and chili!
4. Decorating for Halloween
5. Helping the kids choose Halloween costumes
6. Lazy Saturdays and Sundays spent watching football and eating my favorite food, appetizers.
7. Getting to wear cute boots
8. Shopping for new fall clothes
9. Honey Crisp apples

(Can you tell that I like to make lists? In addition to my four calendars, I make lots and lots of lists. It’s almost an illness.)

Carson dreams of being Batman for Halloween as he listens to his Superheroes Recordable Storybook from Hallmark.

So in two weeks, I’m going to live like it’s summer and hopefully return refreshed and ready to embrace fall.

What are you most looking forward to this fall?

(PS: I don’t usually announce to the world when I’m going to be gone on vacation, but Tate is not able to get away from work that week and he’ll be staying home. Would be robbers, you need to know that I have a vicious dog with very sharp teeth and I would highly recommend staying away if you don’t want to have your shoes chewed off. Don’t say I didn’t warn you.)

(PSS: Yes, I know you can see my children’s real names on the calendar. You can’t google names within an image, which is why I use pseudonyms anyway–I don’t want people to google their names and wind up on this website– so no worries!)

Carson and Ella received the Interactive Story Buddy and Recordable Storybook, courtesy of Hallmark.

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Something’s got to give, but I don’t know how to give up

Written on September 4, 2012 by Jennifer in Quirky Me, working mom

Today was Pajama Day at school and I just plain overlooked the reminders that came home with BOTH kids on Friday. I finally realized it was Pajama Day as we sat in the drop off line before school and saw all the kids going in the building wearing their pajamas and fuzzy slippers. Of course, I deflected all blame and swore up and down to my kids that it wasn’t that I messed up, but it was that the teachers didn’t include it on their Friday notes. And of course, when I got home the first thing I did was re-read the notes home from both teachers on Friday and saw that, yep, they’d both said that today was Pajama Day at school.

Crap. (I actually said something a little worse.) (And I took pjs up to school for the kids to change into because I knew it would make their days.)

Last week, I published a post on my local family website that had completely inaccurate information. Not only was I MORTIFIED at my error, I was also completely ticked off at myself for not double checking my work and allowing a huge error to be published.

I’ve been just a little overwhelmed lately. By lately, I mean, for the past year. Somehow I’ve not quite mastered balancing this whole working thing with getting stuff done at home thing. Every Sunday night I absolutely dread the week, knowing how much there is to accomplish between writing assignments, homework, gymnastics, soccer, cooking dinner, laundry…well, you get the picture.

I waited seven years to send both kids off to school. I dreamed about the freedom I’d feel with all those hours to myself. It’s not really like what I was expecting. Homework, school volunteering, and after school activities are so time consuming. During those hours that the kids are in school, I try to work, but now that we got a puppy, there isn’t any uninterrupted time for me to work. I’m constantly taking the puppy out to go potty, playing with the puppy, rushing to get errands run to get home to the puppy, rushing to write posts that have errors in them before I have to take the puppy outside again…

Tate reminded me the other day that I don’t have to do all of the things that I take on. It’s my choice to work, which yeah, I realize that I’m BEYOND lucky that it’s my choice, but I still do feel like I have to work. I feel like I should help earn money, I feel like “just” doing mom stuff isn’t enough (this is not a jab at stay at home moms, just how I feel about myself, okay!?), I feel like I’ve started some things that I don’t know how to stop. I even made a list of what I do everyday in order of importance.

1. Kids (and remembering things like freaking Pajama Day. GAH.), Husband, Mae
2. Running
3. Friends
4. Laundry/Cooking/Grocery Shopping
…

There were 19 things on my list. Several of the things, like “Friends” are high on my priority list, but actually rank a lot lower in the time I actually devote to them. Then, the last four things on the list are things I’d like to just quit, but I don’t know how to just quit, because just quitting isn’t that simple (of course, it’s not).

Sooooo, I’m not actually going anywhere with this, but I just needed to say it. In writing. Something’s got to give, but I don’t know how to give up.

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The Story Behind the First Day of School Outfit

Written on August 20, 2012 by Jennifer in Hallmark, Little Monkeys, Pictures, Quirky Me

Ella looked so cute on her first day of Kindergarten, didn’t she? Let me tell you, it was a long, uphill battle getting to the cute. For a few weeks leading up to Kindergarten the prospect of her looking cute, or even presentable, for her first day of school was dismal. She had her own ideas about what she wanted to wear–and I had a completely different idea.

It all started sometime in July as I was started to get her fired up for Kindergarten.

“…And we’ll have a girls day and get our toes painted before school starts!” I told her enthusiastically. “Then we’ll go shopping and find a cute new shirt for school.”

“Okay, but Mom? I already know what I want to wear for school. I want to wear my elephant shirt!”

Oh, the elephant shirt. It sounds harmless, right? It sounds like it has cute-potential. It seems like one of those battles that I probably shouldn’t pick? Well, you would be wrong. The elephant shirt is this old, ratty, stained shirt from a certain big box discount store. It’s size 3T and even on tiny Ella, is way too small, nearly showing her belly. It’s a shirt that’s perfect for a day playing in the dirt or painting, but not for the first day of Kindergarten.

Nevermind that the elephant shirt is her favorite shirt. I hate to squash the emerging fashionista, and I swear that I’m not a fashion tyrant, but I responded with a hearty, “Uh, no. No. And no. You can’t wear the elephant shirt on your first day of Kindergarten.” This was one fashion battle that I was going to win. I’ve learned to not argue with Ella about what she wears. She is a girl with very specific tastes about her clothes and I’ve accepted that even though it sometimes kills me a little when she refuses to wear a dress, but on this occasion, I just had to put my foot down.

If you have a child, particularly a daughter, who has specific ideas about their clothes, then I’m sure you can imagine how well Ella responded. I’ll give you a hint: Not Well. She cried. She pouted. She whined. She almost annoyed me enough that I strongly considered giving in.

“But Mommy! It’s my favorite!”

“Ella!” I insisted, “I’m offering to buy you a brand new shirt! Who doesn’t like new shirts?!”

This went on for probably longer than it should have (weeks), but I held firm. No way could I allow her to attend her first day of school in that elephant shirt. She finally relented when I took (okay, dragged) her shopping and we found a pink shirt with birdies and flowers that she agreed to wear it for her first day of school. Victory was mine!

I’m sure you can guess what she wore for her second day of Kindergarten. Whatever.

Just for fun, here’s a picture of me from my first day of first grade. I’m the one on the right and I’m wearing my most favorite Hawaiian shirt with blue slacks. Slacks! So much more presentable than the elephant shirt, that’s for sure. Too bad there’s no picture of me holding my Dukes of Hazzard lunch box.

Thanks so much to Hallmark for inviting me to be a part of their Life is a Special Occasion campaign this year. While I am compensated for my work, I love getting to share these special occasions. Because life truly is a special occasion, each and every moment.

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